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SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK PART 8 -- Pack the bags under your eyes and join us!

974 replies

RoRoMommy · 15/11/2007 20:04

Well...I had to think of something! DH's suggestion "Eyes wide shut--the art of sleepwalking"

OP posts:
MegBusset · 10/02/2008 21:57

Oh Ginger I really hope you get some answers soon. Is DH in pain a lot of the time? It must be so hard on both of you.

All fine here, stayed at my dad's last night and DS slept fine, but decided that 5.45am was wake-up time, yikes. We are still in the tricky two-to-one naps zone, it seems to depend on what time he wakes in the morning really. But it seems to be getting harder for him to get to sleep in the day. I've a feeling he will be one of those who drops naps altogether at an unreasonably early age.

Hope everyone else is OK

Hi to the newbies -- I don't post as often as I used to as never seem to find the time, but really I can back up what Ginger says, see if you can find a way to get through the really tough parts, and things do tend to get better over time.

bealcain · 11/02/2008 07:50

hello girlies, old and new! got married on 2nd feb, so have been very vey busy....got my ds2 back from mum last tuesday night and he's slept through since,......yay thank fuk for that! still having to wake up though, this little one is sitting on my bladder in the middle of the night! grrrrr

charliemama · 11/02/2008 08:32

Wow Beal congratulations

You have been missed and I'm glad you are back safe and well and married!!!!

Should we call you Mrs Beal now?

I checked your profile, I need to see pics!!!

ChezP · 11/02/2008 08:46

Thanks for welcomes, last night seemed like progress - didn't have to resort to CC, DS went to bed at 8pm awake although v sleepy and settled whith a few shushes and strokes which is a first. He woke at midnight, gave him the last oz of his bottle which he hadn't finished then dummy, shush, stroke head and he settled in about 10 mins, he then woke at 315 and I was prepared for the long haul hour and a half with CC but he settled quite quicklywith some hand holding and shushing and then he rolled over and muttered to himself for a while and was back to sleep after about 25 mins with alot less help from me. finally he woke at 550 and rather than do battle to get him to sleep he came into bed with me in the spare room and after 25 mins of fidgeting he went back to sleep til 730.
Once I am back at work I think I would just get him up at 550, but since I am still on leave I want to enjoy this time withough feeling knackered all the time.

Hopefully this indicates that my work over the last 10 days to help him to self settle in the cot without a bottle is finally paying off - time will tell I guess.

bealcain · 11/02/2008 17:07

i'm actually mrs. robinson now!! lol

chezp just read back over some old posts...am so glad things are better for you....550 is such an awful hour these days....not sure if i want it to get light earlier or not. it would be nice to wake up and it be light but then what do i say to my 2yo when he wakes at 4 and i say "still dark outside time to go back to sleep" aaahhh

yetihed · 11/02/2008 21:13

Thanks to everyone for taking the time to share your experiences- I am feeling much less like it's my own fault. I am going to take on board what you all seem to be saying- no instant solutions, keep chipping away.

I can see what you mean about going back to work adding extra pressure, glad I don't have that to face yet. I've decided not to change anything til after DS's final immunisation on Friday- that usually buggers things up anyway. Glad you had a better night Chez- long may it continue.

Ginger- sorry to hear you're having such a tough time. Puts all the sleep problems in perspective.

Congrats to bealcain!

gingerninja · 11/02/2008 21:17

Congratulations Beal, that's great news. I have wondered where you were. Hope you're taking care of yourself.

Meg and CM Thanks, he's not in pain as such (well his neck is quite painful but it is the visual disturbances that persist that are really getting him down. He has lots of visual snow (like TV static) flashing lights, dizzyness, lots of after images (when you look at something, look away and it's still there), bright light really hurts but vision in dark conditions is very poor so is finding it very hard to concentrate and to focus. He's very spaced out, (he says like being permanently hung over) and is constantly twitching. Hopefully have some more answers at the end of next week when we see the Dr again.

Anyway, DD had her MMR today I foolishly read up on it so have worried myself silly. She was a bit unsettled going to bed so we'll see what tonight brings.

Take care everyone

ChezP · 11/02/2008 21:48

Thanks all. Don;t want to jinx things but are gradually improving.
Put him down tonight more awake than yesterday and although he fussed for 10 mins he went of in the cot, no bottle and with me just sitting near by, bit of forehead stroking and hand holding, but least interaction ever. Will have to see when he wakes and what happens but I am feeling better about it - was ready to put him outside in a box marked help yourself by the end of last week. But I think my hormones have been all over the place too as stopped BF at the beginning of the month (he got teeth and learnt how to use them), and have had first monthly which was very heavy and lasted 12 days - not good. So was feeling very run down generally. Feel stronger now and more able to cope.
Ginger - sounds horrible what your DH has to deal with - I got vertigo a couple of years ago - nausea, visual disturbances, migraines and dizziness and disorientation - was very unpleasant indeed - thoughts with you. xx

IAteRoseMaryConleyForBreakfast · 12/02/2008 08:45

Hi folks, another speedy one as decorators are coming sometime soon so house is in turmoil and have lots of furniture shifting to be doing!

ginger I'm so sorry to hear things aren't so good with your DH. I'm thinking of you though - hope your neurologist can shed some light on things.

beal - wooohooooo! I'm so pleased for you, I hope you are enjoying (restful) married life

Sleep up and down here, largely because I'm back at work and routine is all to pot and my milk supply is doing odd things and it's all a bit stressful. I'm pondering chucking in the towel at work already (this is day 7!) but we can't live on thin air so I've got some thinking to do!

To all the newbies - It Will Pass! (Seriously though, it does!)

EffiePerine · 12/02/2008 11:17

Ginger: thinking of you . Hope you get some answers soon.

For the newbies, here are my waffly thoughts

sleep probs often coincide with developmental stgages. There's a great website called Ask Moxie which has a lot on this: www.askmoxie.org/. There's a summary of what she calls sleep regressions here: moxie.blogs.com/askmoxie/2006/02/qa_what_are_sle.html

I completely agree with her philosphy that there isn;t much you can do to get a young baby to sleep in teh 'right' way. Even if you do (and I've been there spending hours getting DS to self-settle at 4 months or whatever) it invariably goes out the window when they get to the next stage. the hardest phase for me was when DS started standing up (at about 5/6 months) which was when we started co-sleeping and I gave up on the sleep training because nothing was working! DS was waking around every 2 hours (sometimes more, sometimes less) more or less from birth to about 14 mo. I think he's quite a hardcore case, though. At 15 mo we tried CC to get him to sleep a) in the cot and b) without night feeds and it worked really quickly, so I think it was the right time for us. He now sleeps through more or less, though he still wakes up at 6ish or even earlier.

In summary, I'd say that waking lots is normal, esp in the first year, and there is no, NO one way to address this. You try different things and take wqhat works for you. I couldn't have tried CC any earluer than 15 mo, but others have and it's worked well. Others have kept with co-sleeping and other AP techniques and their babies are sleeping through without any other action, so they're all different!

The other thing I would say is try (ha!) not to stress too much over things. If you find you;re dreading the evenings because of the struggle to get your DC to sleep, that you're not sleeping yourself even if your baby does cos you are waiting for them to wake, and if you're worrying and thinking and planning about sleep strategies all the time, really try to step back and get a break, whether it's co-sleeping, napping during the day, leaving the baby with your partner or your mum for a night... the line between sleep deprived and depressed is really, really fine and I think we've all wavered over it at some point.

Gosh, that was a spiel! Oh, and The Blog is here )if you want to contribute, fantastic, email me at personal not business at gmail dot com (no spaces)

EffiePerine · 12/02/2008 11:19

www.sleepisfortheweak.wordpress.com

EffiePerine · 12/02/2008 12:01

I think I'vea dded it to the blog page as well but not sure - did you add it as well, Ginger?

tibsy · 13/02/2008 08:37

hi girls
i hope all is well with everyone

MegBusset · 13/02/2008 08:56

Hi Tibsy

How's things with you? DD still sleeping well?

meebles · 13/02/2008 10:09

Sounds like the thread for me! My DD is 10 weeks and wakes up every morning at 2.30 -3 am. She is impossible to settle back to sleep properly, and is grinning away at me wanting to play, or alternating feeding franticly and dozing for 10 mins.
3 hours sleep a night is a joke. She'll only nap during the day in a sling, and now she's got big enough to see out of the top it's far too exciting to sleep.
....I don't need sleep either, I'm supermeebles!

yetihed · 13/02/2008 11:06

Hi Effie- That was a really helpful post, ta. I am slowly coming to terms with the idea that I can only do a limited amount to help the poor little sausage and that you just have to do whatever you need to, to get through the night.

I was in a bookshop the other day, browsing through sleep books and I read a recommendation that you climb into the cot with the baby- oh, and have a stool ready so you can get out again without bashing your boobs! I am sure there was thought behind it, and it may have worked for some, but I had to chuckle at the idea... I'd squish him!

So, I'm leaving the guilt behind and trying to chill out and 'enjoy' the haziness of sleepwalking through the day and having an excuse to be forgetful! Doesn't stop me trying though.... I've found a great lullaby CD which seems to be helping, and I've booked a session at the cranial osteopath!

yetihed · 13/02/2008 11:07

PS Keep smiling Supermeebles! They should have a supermum icon on here for us to use...

Amberjee · 13/02/2008 12:33

hi tibs! how's things?

gingerninja · 13/02/2008 15:42

meebles, have you tried co-sleeping? Might help you during this tough time. Once I'd mastered feeding laying down I found it a godsend as I could doze on and off. (I didn't manage this before about 4.5 months tho so was totally knackered by then)

IAteRoseMaryConleyForBreakfast · 13/02/2008 17:33

I second ginger - cosleep, cosleep, cosleep - it's the way forward!

IAteRoseMaryConleyForBreakfast · 13/02/2008 17:34

[waves] Hi tibsy!

MegBusset · 13/02/2008 22:47

Hey, just wondered if any of you London-based SIFTWers fancied a meet-up soon... maybe after half term? Was thinking of the Museum of Childhood in Bethnal Green... Amber/Effie/anyone else?

EffiePerine · 14/02/2008 08:34

Meet-up sounds good - was vaguely thinking about next Wed (or is that too soon?). Would love to got to the museum, haven't ventured there yet .

Hi Tibs!

Hi Meebles and any other newbies: would agree re the co-sleeping, it makes a huge difference. Snorting at the idea of climbing into the cot...

MegBusset · 14/02/2008 09:17

I think half-term is next week, or is it the week after?

gingerninja · 14/02/2008 09:18

Half term is this week in Essex. I'd love to meet if it's a day I'm not working