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Original poster

Support thread for sleep training in lockdown

196 replies

Goostacean · 21/05/2020 15:26

Hi all, I was on a similar thread for potty training (for my toddler) in lockdown and it was great to have some support and encouragement from those going through the same thing.

From tomorrow night we’re going to try sleep training our 5.5mo as he currently nurses/bounces to sleep and wakes multiple times a night.

Anyone else in a similar position, regardless of your child’s age? Smile

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normalpeeps · 25/05/2020 19:59

@Goostacean the temperature drops overnight so may be fine. Can always open a window or put fan on if you think it needs it.

Original poster
Goostacean · 25/05/2020 20:03

Unfortunately we don’t have a fan and the windows are Velux so the blinds don’t help if you open the actual window. It’s a loft conversion 🙄

Once our toddler is asleep I’ll open the baby’s door to improve airflow.

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agteacht · 25/05/2020 20:06

I worry about her overheating all the time but I think it's broadly just my paranoia ... I just now err on the side of caution and keep her cooler than I naturally think I should based on that diagram.

NC2605 · 26/05/2020 03:52

DS slept half 8 till half 3! Feeding now. I'm glad I've somewhere to share this news in the middle of the night! Even better is I went to bed at half 8 too so I don't feel tired now. Will he go back to bed now though..?!

Hope all of you are having peaceful nights.

agteacht · 26/05/2020 06:34

That's fantastic @NC2605 !!! Did he go back to sleep? Even if not that's a fantastic step forward, just shows it is working!!

DD slept 7.30pm through to 5.15am! No night feed but a dream feed at 11.30pm. But 5am is a killer, need to get her to sleep longer. I'll be going back for a nap with her in half an hour 😂

agteacht · 26/05/2020 06:36

PS @NC2605 I wonder if it's worth you trying a dream feed tonight to stretch him out past 3. Or get your DH to do it if you are asleep and if you are not EBF? You must feel much better today after that sleep. I need to take a leaf out of your book on the going to bed early front... I just seem to get a second wind after DD goes down...

Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 07:11

@NC2605 Wow, that’s great! What a step change from the previous night. I hope he keeps it up.

@agteacht that’s a good long stretch, we’ll done your DD! What’s your strategy for getting her to wake later?

DS was asleep by 7.30 and woke around 1am and then at 6.45am. At 1am he was desperate for milk so I think a combination of not enough yesterday and the room being so warm (I discovered some idiot —me— had left the heating on for half an hour at 5pm, which was why it was boiling at bedtime...) made him very thirsty. Will try to feed more during the day today. He's not resettling now, so I think we’re up for the day!

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Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 07:12

*well done, not we’ll done. And my strike through never works, grr 🙄

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agteacht · 26/05/2020 07:40

@Goostacean that's fantastic well done to your little one too!!

I have no strategy for the early rising yet... 😂

Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 07:46

My noticing his thirst was borne out by his almost completely dry overnight nappy! Very worrying given how hot it was yesterday- today I’ll be very focused on feeding him as much as possible. Hoping this will have the knock on effect of a good night tonight, but even if not- at least he’ll be hydrated! (Plus I’ve turned the heating off 😂)

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agteacht · 26/05/2020 07:54

Oh that's interesting as we had a much dryer nappy than usual too! Not fully dry but not the overnight soaking one! I hadn't made the connection. I will keep an eye on that too thanks fro making me realise!

OccasionalNachos · 26/05/2020 08:21

Reading with interest - my DS has hit the 4 month sleep regression hard this week. I’d been trying to use the benefits of staying at home to get a nap schedule going a few weeks ago, and it was going fairly well. He fights naps but I’d been able to get him napping regularly in his crib, although not often for longer than 30-45 minutes. He doesn’t sleep consistently in the pram any more, better in the sling but he is taking so much notice of everything that it can still be difficult. So I’m quite glad the crib naps have been working ok, and then if he doesn’t sleep when we’re out for a walk then I donn’t feel too bad.

Night times have been OK until now, but with the 4-month regression he is waking multiple times a night again and I am trying to avoid feeding him to sleep. The downside is that for the last few days before all naps and sleep he has properly screamed rather than just fussing and grizzling. It’s horrible to listen to, although he is clearly fine as he does fall asleep eventually. Is this a normal part of fighting sleep? Do babies get louder as they get older?

Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 09:06

Mmmm, well I’m not hugely experienced in this area but my personal view/understanding is that before 5-6mo they’re a bit too young for sleep training. The 4month regression can be awful so you have my sympathy! My advice would be to comfort and resettle ASAP to 5mo and then try interval/gradual retreat training methods.

DS (5.5mo) doesn’t cry at night, he feeds and resettles immediately, and at nap time the actual time spent crying is relatively minimal. If I get the timing right, so he is fed and tired, there is no crying. I don’t think he’s got louder or more distressed as he’s older.

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Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 19:29

We’re currently treading a very fine line between hydration and feeding to sleep! I think this baby is very smart and knows exactly what he’s doing 😂

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NC2605 · 26/05/2020 19:57

Thanks @agteacht and @goostacean
He did go back from 4 till 6. Amazing. And he has just gone down no fuss about half past. Will see how we go again. I have tried dream feeding in the past but we had such big problems with wind it was making things worse. I still find that I feed him before bed and he wakes an hour or so later and has to bring up a massive burp before he can go back to sleep. Even though i wind him well after a feed and try and get it all out. This was even worse waiting for that hour at like 10 11 12 at night. So now I do the bedtime feed and then try not to feed as long as possible over night to avoid the problem.

Hopefully your babies are both well hydrated but the other thing I found with my daughter when I did this was drier nappies too and I did some reading and as long as you can exclude dehydration and other medical stuff then it can be that they are just dry because they arent waking even a little bit and they linking their sleep cycles well so they are deep enough not to wake and therefore not to wee. Works great for toilet training and my DD was dry day and night at 21 months.

2018isanewyear · 26/05/2020 21:57

Do people change nappies at the dream feed?

Original poster
Goostacean · 26/05/2020 22:28

I don’t change anything except for a poo... I just found it woke him up unnecessarily. But DS currently poos every week/10days. At which point he ruins an outfit every time and has to go straight in the bath...

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agteacht · 26/05/2020 23:38

Ohhhh I hadn't realised the sleep cycle point @NC2605 - that's actually really positive confirmation of how they're settling!!

Totally understand point re: wind.

I do a nappy at same time as dream feed because otherwise she is too sleepy to feed. The nappy change rouses her enough if that makes sense.

@OccasionalNachos I would agree with @Goostacean that I think 4 months is too early. But in 6 weeks time or so. Sorry to say we had a rubbish month 4-5 because of 4 month sleep regression. But we have come out the other side now!

2018isanewyear · 27/05/2020 19:29

Thanks for the nappy advice I've put the next size on him tonight as they always seem really full by dream feed and I fee sorry for him going to bed with a full nappy hope he won't keel now 🤞🏼

I really think he's cracked it, he's gone to sleep again tonight with no tears that 4 nights I think. Really can't believe how he's come one in less than a week. He's was already sleeping through pretty much and no change there so I'm really
Pleased.

Naps are next to tackle which I have been told are harder, going to give it another week though before we start properly although I have been putting him on my bed before I rock him and he's been doing all the right things just not quite got to sleep so we shall see.

How's everyone else's day/evening been?

agteacht · 27/05/2020 19:56

Hey we have had a decent day as well.

Last night she slept 7.30pm - 4am. DF at 11.30pm as usual, thankfully I managed to get her back to sleep at 4.45am until 6.30am. Wasn't looking hopeful initially. She was so awake!!

Then she had three naps, all in cot, all self settled, 90 mins, 2 hours and half an hour. Tried to push her to a later bedtime but she lost the plot 😂
So put her to bed at half 7 and again settled immediately.

For some reason I'm exhausted!! I think it's just the really early mornings. I am also grateful it's worked so easily.

Is this our new normal??

NemesiaPinkLagoon · 27/05/2020 21:46

Just checking in, sounds like you are all doing well 👏

Bedtime this evening was ok, she was asleep in under 10 minutes. It's so hot though, we didn't put her in a sleeping bag tonight. She's 6 months so this is our first experience of hot weather with her.

Good idea to keep an eye on hydration - thanks folks for pointing tv at out.

Wishing you all a peaceful evening, relative of course ☺️

Original poster
Goostacean · 27/05/2020 23:14

Glad to hear everything seems to be going so well for everyone!

We’ve had a bit of disruption as we’ve been staying outside to take advantage of the beautiful weather, so various pram naps rather than in the cot/dark. But he seems okay, settled within 15-20 mins this evening. Last night he was up at 2 and 5, and finally just before 7am (up for the day). Was fussy tonight and only fell asleep around 7.45pm despite clearly being exhausted, so I’m hoping that translates into a slighter later morning for me tomorrow!

I am, clearly, still up 🙄 Been getting various bits of admin done as I don’t seem to get a spare second during the day. I fell asleep earlier for almost 90mins when the children were both napping- meant to get on with stuff but basically just passed out on my bed! Hoping the night wakings reduce to once soon...

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Original poster
Goostacean · 28/05/2020 07:22

Hmm well another night when he’s up at 2.20, then 5, then just before 7 for the day... It’s not really working for me tbh- I’m pleased to have back the time I was using to settle him, but I’m still only getting between 90mins-3h chunks of sleep. (Clearly I also need to go to bed earlier, but I run a newly-founded business too so there there are things I need to get done.)

Can anyone who dream-feeds tell me a bit more about it please? I wonder whether that’s my solution, want to try from tomorrow night when it will have been a week since we started.

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NC2605 · 28/05/2020 07:56

@goostacean sorry that you are still up a lot in the night. Much sympathy having only been in that place up to just 3 nights ago. The only way I coped was going to bed at like half 8 but sounds like that's not easy for you to do at the moment.

Glad everything else seems on track for everyone.

We are still making progress.. last night woke at 1015 and took half an hour to go back but he wasn't upset. Then awake again at half 3 for a feed and back by 4 and then awake for the day at 6.40..so nice to only be waking once in the night.

2018isanewyear · 28/05/2020 07:57

Sorry to hear you have had a rough night.

Really I just make sure whole upstairs is dark and just get him out of cot no changing no talking and go for it sometimes he will have 4 oz sometimes 7oz, I bottle feed though and have done for a few months now so not sure if it would be any different if breastfeeding as when I was I was wasn't so worried about waking him as we were feeding most of the night anyway (not sure how your feeding)

90% of the time he won't wake at all and if he does it's seems more to see what's going on and back goes straight back off.