4.5weeks old and night feeding

[number1]

DS is bottle fed since end of week3 cos i had major problems with BF. he fed well during the 1stweek of bottle but noe only feeds 60-90ml during the day at each feed; he does EXACTLY 3 hours intevals so at nigts we heeds either at midnight then 3 then 6am or 1am then 4am then 7am
either way he starts making really loud noises from 5am and usually gets a top up feed to keep him going
is this normal? i'm trying to get him tofeed during the day at 7am, 10.30am then 2, then 5pm, 6.15 (i split the feeds into two halves, b4 and after bath); then he goes to sleep at 7pm but is awake at 9.30 so i can't really do the 10.30/11pm feed
ant advice?

I see where you are going with you feed routine but if your DS wants to eat every 3 hours so 7am,10,1,4,7,10pm what is wrong with that? he would get an extra feed in the day and may go longer at night.

the trouble is that after the 3-4am feed he goes to sleep until 5am then wakes up and the only way to settle him is to feed him; then he does not settle properly and b4 you know it no one gets any sleep from 5am onwards. Should I just give up trying to fit him into a schedule and jsut feed him on demand?
I really struggle for him to take a proper feed at any time as he falls asleep half way through every feed so he never gets his allocated 120ml ( I tried all tricks in the book, no socks, blow in his face, sit him up, etc- no joy, he purses his mouth and nothing goes in)
should I just be patient? Am i trying to push him too quickly? I' worried I'm not good enough at this motherhood thing ....

TBH I think he will eventually fall into his own routine - I was guided by DS and by 8 weeks he slept right through from around 10.00pmish to 6.00amish. When he was 3 months old and started to wake up - we only gave him water in the night (as advised by HV at the time!). It worked a treat though and he stopped waking up...until teething started .

mishymoo, did you try and put your DS into some kind of routine? did you wake him for feeds in the early evening or did you follow his lead 100%?

4.5 weeks is so tiny... would say to forget how often he "should" be feeding, just go with what he needs. There is plenty of time yet to worry about routines!

thanks 4 that, MegBusset. i keep thinking that he ought tobe doing this or the other. too many books telling me what i should be doing....

they suggest routines shouldn't start untill 8 weeks but thtas with day night sleep but generally you would feed on demand babies are like us they may not be as hungry one moment then another could be very hungry so you feed when they want it

if your ds is draining a bottle when feeding it would be worth adding an extra ounce maybe he would be satisfied then my son was on 4 oz if i remember correctly ithought this was too much but hv said was fine and if he drains it add another ounce and feed it to him i found this helped and he was on large bottles but stayed on them at same ounce as feeding slowed down when he got to about 4 mths as introduced rusks and things before bed

i remember having to get up every 2 hours when he was first born and feeds took an hour so was only just getting back off to sleep and he'd be up again that was so tiring but it did start falling into place once i listeneed to hv advice

he isnot draiing bottles and now wakesup every 2 hours! i'm exhauste and all i want to do is cry at all times. hv coming today, lets see what she says.

i really sympathise but (and I'm speaking from personal bitter experience here) at that age, you just have to ride it out. They wake up all the time at night and it's absolutely shattering I know. I made the mistake of trying to get my DS into a routine before 6 weeks and tbh it's a total waste of time - just stresses you out more when you're already dying through sleep deprivation.

Give it another couple of weeks - it will get much better very soon I promise. I would also start doing the day feeds no more than 3 hours apart as MatNanPlus said - 3.5 hours between feeds in the daytime is too far apart.

In the meantime sleep when he does and that means during the day as well. Let the cleaning and cooking wait. And you are a perfectly good mother - small babies are just bloody hard work

Oh and ignore the books that say if you don't get them into a routine before 3 months you'll be making a rod for your own back blah blah

It's a load of bollocks!

thank you all! it's a great support to read your comments.

last night was much better. I had him in the new aptamil easy digest formula and found out yesterday that it must be done with really hot water otherwise it won't go into solution and the milk loses its body, therefore the baby does not feel full and does not get zonked out. I feel really stupid now....

at least he slept a whie longer during the night and fed every 4 hours at night. He woke up every 2 hours but I just gave him a dummy and a cuddle/pat on the chest and he drifted off to sleep again. It does take a good 20/30 min but at least I'm hoping that this will break his habit of snacking every 2 hours. He is now draining the bottles so I know he is not hungry.

HV happy with his weight gain, she reckons I have PND and should go and see someone about it- like I have time in my hands for that now! any time I've got left over is for sleeping.
I was emotional 'cos I was worried but now I'm a bit more confident (a a little bit better slept) I feel much better.

again thanks for your support. I really hope that as he grows up all of this will go away.

Sorry to hijack but any chance you could tell me more about your discovery about aptamil - have never heard this before and am wondering if it might be the answer to my lack of sleep too!

Aptimil's the formula we switched to from SMA at 3 weeks and it has been really good for our dd - you can buy it in Boots - there's also a hungry baby formula available suitable from birth which we are feeding dd at the 7am and 10pm feeds during her growth spurt.

www.milupa-aptimil.co.uk is there website and there is also an advice line from 8am to 8pm Mon-Fri on 0845 7 623 628.

HTH.

hi number one just wanted to say that your baby is so young at the moment anything is normal. for us between 1-2 months was the hardest in terms of night time sleep as for the first time it isn't just wanting milk that makes them wake up and cry - it is wind or wet nappies or general grouchiness or who knows what too! but i promise it will get better and soon - it feels like it is lasting forever but doesn't. i know you must be exhausted but at the moment tho. good luck.

ok, so now DS is draining bottle after bottle of formula; after the 2am feed he wakes up at 4.30 and does not go into a deep sleep anymore; I know he is not hungry 'cos I used to lift him up and he would feed for 5min and then fall asleep in my arms. so now I don't get him out of bed just put dummy in his mouth, pat his chest and sssh him and he drifts off ony to wake up 15-20 min later 'cos dummy has fallen out.
Do you guys think it is a wet nappy or just wind? He does really loud farts at that time so perhaps that is what wakes him up. the strange thing is that he will not settle until 6am when he is fed again. Isn't this bizarre? I would have thouhgt that once he farts he would settle back into a deep sleep.
I'm totally exhausted and feel tortured by this 4am wake up call.

Wedding cake, the formula we are using is called Aptamil easy digest (it's not aptamil 1). It's whey based and the lactose has been broken down into little fragmenst which supposedly are easuer to digest by babies. It's about 9 quid a box and ou can get it in sainsbury's and Tesco. Apparently this Aptamil easy digest is similar to Cow & Gate comfort formula which we have been advised to try by the HV.

the only thing we notice with this formula is that his poos are green and very liquid. Not sure if this is normal or a sign of lactose intolerance as suggested by HV. Starting on the Cow & Gate formula today so lets see what happesn with the nappies. If no improvement HV wants us to try lactose free milk.

Thanks for the support.

x

My dd is 6 weeks tomorrow and she is starting to go 3 hours between feeds - just!! But I have the same problem if she wakes anythime between 3am-5am for a feed she won't settle again until after the next feed. She will fall asleep on me but then ever time I try and put her back in her cot she wakes up again or starts grunting and wiggling. I tend to leave her to it and try to get some sleep as I know that if she is really hungry or upset she will cry. Though it is hard to sleep as she can be really noisy. I have read somewhere on mn that they do grow out of these noises!!

If your ds is draining his bottle every time it may be worth putting in a bit extra just in case he wants it thats what i do and i feel better for knowing that if there is some left then dd has definatly had enough.

The best advice i have had was from my sister who has a 9month ds. She said to remember that you are the mother and you know your baby better than anyone and should do what feels right for you. If things don't work try some thing else and most of all do not worry and get bogged down about routines etc just take each day as it comes and enjoy your baby as they grow so fast.

i really feel for you. my ds is 6 weeks today and he as has his routine of a bath, feed and bed. He is put down at 8 and doesnt wake till 2-3 then he is changed and fed (all in the same room without any light or sound) by the end of his feed he is asleep. I wind him and then lay him on me till he is completely asleep. He used to wake up when i moved him but last night he went down again which was a relief. He then wakes again at 4-5 and the same happens. At 7-8 he wakes and he is then awake for the day. Apart from a short nap at about 9 or 10.
None of this would not work without keeping the routine of staying in the same room with minimal disturbance. I have tried both!
Are you staying put or moving from room to room?
Have you tried aptilmil 2 if he is extremely hungry or a big baby? My DS is on this but that is because he is 13lbs 8oz at 6 weeks!!
Whatever happens it will get better, so hang on in there! xxx

DS now feeds every 4 hours and seems quite content during the day. He is fed around 10-11pm and then sleeps until 2-3am when he wakes up to be fed again. He sleeps in our room but I get him out of his crib to feed him in the room next door where we have a really good and confy chair. I do't change him or anything and he often falls asleep after his feed which we have now increased to 6oz (he is nearing 10lb); by the time I wind him it is about 3.30 or 4am; then I put him to bed and the grunting noises start after 20min sleep; wriggling and grunting until he starts crying; I tried the shuch pat thing and did it for 4 nights until 6am. totally exhausted but thnking that long term it would be worth it.
DS is now 7 weeks and things seem to be getting worse as he seems to be in real pain from 2am until 6am. He will only settle on me for his sleep and then if I try to put him in his crib the grunting starts again. the grunting is so loud neither myself or DH can sleep through it.
I'm so glad someone else mentions the grunting. I was starting to think that DS had a breeathing problem.
What is weird is that as soon as I pick him up he settles completely. Has anyone experienced this? I'm worried that he will get used to being picked up 1/2 way through the night and then not going back into his crib.
any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated!
on a positive note DS started smiling at us!

I know what you mean by the grunting - do the arms and legs trash about and they make a straining kinda sound?
I find that putting a dummy in helps for about ten minutes till it comes flying back out. But if i swaddle him and give him a dummy he normally calms.
Dont know if this will work as i know he has to be in a certian mood otherwise he just doesnt stop. So any method you find that helps, please do share. . . . .

Could you take him into bed with you?? It may let you both get a bit more sleep and needn't be for ever if you don't want it to be.

I was taking him into bed with me but that means that I never get to sleep properly cos he wants to sit upright ono my chest so I need to put all the pillows behind me and although I kick DH out of bed so I can sleep in the middle of the bed I still worry that I'll chuck DS out of the bed or roll on top of him by accident
big breakthrough last night though; DH was worried about my lack of sleep so he took DS for the night. DH slept in the lounge in the couch and DS on the pram. Apparently not as many grunting noises; DS fed at midnight and then woke up crying at 4.45 when DH came to get me so that he could get some sleep (DH can't sleep through any of the DS's noises!); I picked DS up and then he fell asleep in my arms, so I waited until he was in a deep sleep and put him back into the pram; he slept until 6am and then I fed him and he slept until 10.15! apparently the midnight feed did go on until 2.30am cos DS unconfortable with wind.
I'm going to bring the pram to our room tonight and see if that helps; as the pram his narrower than the crib there is less room for arms to trash about.
DS has a dummy for sleeping but now I think that the dummy is worse in the long run as when it falls off their mouth they wake up. I think that maybe DS needs a chance to find a way of sleeping on his own and perhaps I'm interfering too much when he is in our room, with dummy etc. we are going to put some curtains up in his nursery and maybe get him to sleep in there; not sure if I can face the cot battle though so the pram will have to do.
i'm so glad others experience the grunts- has anyone tried to lift an end of the crib/moses basket? is that supposed to help with wind?

Yes i prop up the head end of the moses basket, but i must admit that i have never noticed any difference. DH has always swore by it tho.
Last night DS kept me awake for two hours with his grunting and trashing about. I was nearly ripping my hair out! Eventually he tired himself out and fell asleep. I was very tempted to take him out of his basket as he instantly falls asleep on me. But i have to be strong so as he doesnt expect it all the time ( i have been told to start as you mean to go on from 6 weeks)
Ooh well we will see what happens tonight.....

start as you mean to go on indeed. Good on you for persevering and not pickiing him up.
Yesterday we put DS to sleep in the pram overnight again.... we parked the pram outside our bedroom door so that we could hear DS if he cried but not hear every single noise. It was much better. We got some decent sleep in between feeds and wasn't aware of any trashing of the arms or grunting (not sure if it is because of the pram or because of being outside the room).
DS's nursery is at the end of the corridor so not quite ready to put him there but the corridor is no solution though- I felt like such a bad mother.
I read somewhere that we are our worse enemies 'cos at the slight noise we go over to the cot/moses/crib and try to settle our babies when they are just moving about and we end up waking them up; also 'cos we go voer at the slight noise we don't give ourselves a proper break.
I feel slightly more human. Now I want to try propping the head of the crib up like D2Jenx does and seeing if it helps.
I've noticed that DS wakes up during the day with wind related pains so i might try colief. Has anyone heard of it?

I did get some colief from the doctors (who perscribe for free which i good because it is £10 a go) for my ds who suffers from cronic wind but it seemed too much hassle to use as my ds is bf & formula fed so I took the advise of others on here & tried Dentinox after already trying infracol which made him sick. I only use the dentinox in his bottles so 3/4 times a day (can use upto 6 times) & i have been using this now since he was 5 weeks & he is now 10 weeks & it is doing the trick. I am not saying that it is a miracle cure as he does still get wind & thrashes occasionally but he certainly doesnt go red in the face & pull his legs up & look like he was in so much pain like he used to. (It did take a few days for it to start to work.) It doesnt make them sleep through the night either unfortunately mine still wakes every 4 hours & he still grunts all night. Hope this helps you a little bit