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Sleep is for the weak part four, we're officially hardcore.

1000 replies

gingerninja · 03/07/2007 21:01

Yes ladies we've got a shiny new thread to share our woes of chronic sleep deprivation, to hail all that is gloreous when something works and throw our arms in the air when it all goes wrong again.

One bad night doesn't impress us, we're awake more than we sleep cos we is 'ard I tell ya.

OP posts:
EffiePerine · 09/07/2007 09:24

Amber: one of the reasons DS seems to be settling better is that he can get himself onto his tummy to sleep - if he's on his back he flails around as soon as he wakes up.

Meg: sounds like it could well be teeth. Have you tried Calpol or similar?

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 09:34

EP, i'm hoping once he gets used to it, ds will like sleeping on his tummy.

hope the naps go well meg. if ds is heading for a meltdown i always put him to bed earlier, but try to stick to the times as much as possible. at least then one of us knows what we are doing!

gingerninja · 09/07/2007 09:37

cupcake, ahh. Sounds lovely the thought of him saying that though I know it's hard when you're tired.

Tam, I caved in at about 2 in the morning. She was brilliant until 10.30 We'd gone to bed at 9.30 and she woke up 3 times between 10.30 and 11.15. I went in, laid down with her until she was asleep and then crept out. Just as I was shutting my eyes she'd start again. All in all I went in about 5 times. I actually fell asleep and woke feeling really uncomfortable so got up and she woke so I just took her to bed. Crap I know but I'll give it another go tonight as it seems less painful than trying to keep her in her cot.

The last two nights have been very unsettled again. More so than normal and she humpfed and shouted even when in bed with me so I'm guessing that it's the fourth tooth making an appearence. They come in twos don't they? Another 5.30 wake up too which is a killer. Thing is, her naps in the day have become so good and so regular that if I try and get her to go back to sleep after her morning milk like we did at the weekend the naps are all squint and I feel totally out of control again. [control freak emoticon]

for all those difficult nights.

OP posts:
Tamdin · 09/07/2007 09:47

ginger don't think of it as caving in but that you managed half the night and tonight you might manage half or even the whole of the night.
i'm good at dishing out positive words but am feeling totally defeated today too for some reason.
ds no worse last night than usual but starting to feel like he's too old to be carrying on like this = crap mummy

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 09:51

Tam - you're such a good mummy don't you know it!

Ginger, feel like i'm a control freak too trying to adhere to nap schedule. turned down friend for lunch because of it. sigh.

and LO just had 30 min nap this morning - pathetic work. i went up to find him shuffled up to the top of the cot grabbing onto the fitting for his mobile which we don't even use anymore.

one question to everyone - toys or no toys in the cot? does it distract them from going to sleep. or entertain them so that you don't have to?

Tamdin · 09/07/2007 09:54

ds has always had a soft bunny rabbit and a floppy elephant in his cot so i leave them there now as familiarity. sometimes when i check on him at nap time i find him asleep with his head on the elephant.

Tapster · 09/07/2007 10:00

Well its bye bye from us. Another successful night, despite a very hectic day yesterday as it was her christening. I turn down lunch invitations all the time because of strict nap schedule - I'm sure thats one of the reasons she has started to sleep through. The downside is that you feel like a prisoner to your LO sleep but still better than being sleep deprived. Take care, I really hope not to be on here again soon.

Right I've tackled the sleeping, now I have to try and get her to eat more solids....

XcupcakemummyX · 09/07/2007 10:02

i remember turning invites because of naps

osshsous from max the letters

MegBusset · 09/07/2007 10:02

EP we did give Calpol at 11ish and he did then sleep (only for two hours, mind). No other obvious signs of teething, mind.

Amber, the problem with naps is that LO normally only sleeps for 30-45 mins so it's a question of how long he can manage to stay awake in between. And if he only has 3 naps then that could be just 1.5 hours of sleep in total during the day... I'm sure he needs more, but try telling him that!

MegBusset · 09/07/2007 10:05

xposted - Taps, so pleased for you.

Tamdin · 09/07/2007 10:12

Goodbye taps come and say hello from time to time. so peased for you all though

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 10:27

yeah meg, i remember trying to go on tired signs to put LO to bed, but he was a half hour sleeper too, so would end up having 5 naps a day which felt ridiculous. somehow magically his naps extended to 45 mins, and now sometimes he does an hour or 1.5hours. i don't know how it happened, i think it just automatically does.
to be honest, i only started a proper nap schedule at 5 months because someone asked me when his naps were, and i realised i had no idea!

MrsThierryHenry · 09/07/2007 10:27

Morning all, so sorry to hear about your bad nights.

Well the waking to sleep thing worked until I went to bed (ain't that always the way?). He woke up at 10.50, wouldn't go down without milk so I BF'd him and - woops, he fell asleep on the breast. Oh well. I woke up 5 mins before my next alarm, at 1.40am, but was in such a daze I didn't know what I was meant to be doing and fell promptly asleep. So then DS woke around 3.30 - actually, his intervals are increasing, which is a small mercy. But he woke again somewhere around 5, and yet again in my hazy daze I did what I didn't mean to do - put him straight in bed with us and BF'd him. Interestingly he didn't fall asleep on the breast but put himself to sleep afterwards, all by himself. He's been doing that a lot lately whilst in bed with me, the little cuticle.

Meg - how did you work out your ncss plan to wean your ds off BFing to sleep? I did it a millimetre-sized step at a time, using soothing music as a transitional object - as follows:

Step 1: I'd BF him to sleep every day for about 2/3 days with gentle music playing each time so that he built association btw music and falling asleep (btw doesn't have to be same music otherwise you go mental after about 3 days!).

Step 2: I followed Liz Pantley's suggestion of removing him from the breast at the point when he started taking breaks from swallowing. If he protested for more than about 5 seconds I'd put him back and then repeat after 30 seconds. Eventually he'd fall asleep. I followed this for about 5-7 days.

Step 3: I'd BF him (unswaddled - yes! I'm still swaddling a 7.5 month old, I know I shouldn't...!) in bedroom with curtains open and music playing, then swaddle and close curtains, whilst sitting quietly with the music still playing. No BF at this point - he'd usually go to sleep. But if he protested for more than about 30 secs I'd BF him as per step 2.

I kept breaking it down little by little until eventually we got to where we are now. If he's overtired he finds it harder to fall asleep 'alone' - with me standing by the cot; in which case I'll go back up one step at a time as necessary. He also falls asleep nowadays within 5-10 mins, which is a bloody miracle!

Btw anyone have any ideas how to wean a baby off being swaddled for every nap + sleep? He's just too big for this now, surely!

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 10:28

Taps, well done! but big sigh for losing you.

MrsThierryHenry · 09/07/2007 10:35

Tam, at your ds's night waking after all your hard work to get him to sleep so well. Can't recall whether you said you'd tried waking to sleep (sorry if you have already - am too tired to remember much these days) but a few weeks ago my ds was waking every night at exactly 2am. The waking to sleep thing nipped that in the bud nicely (and then he got a cold, which threw everything out of sync).

Bags - am so encouraged to hear of other women still in fat clothes too. But I'm now determined to let my body burn up its current fat reserves rather than have me add to it with yet another yummy choccy brownie. I don't believe in abstinence, though. Just want to be able to say 'no' every few days rather than 'yes' three times a day...

Taps - well done, good night and good luck!

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 10:42

MrsTH, wow, respect you seem so organised!

MrsThierryHenry · 09/07/2007 11:05

Hah! If only!. Not organised, Amber, just desperate. And I hate the idea of controlled crying so I'd do almost anything else if I think it'll work. If I weren't on mat leave, though, it would prob be a very different story.

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 11:14

i have raspberry muffins in the oven. want some? and before you all think i'm some domestic goddess, i haven't had a shower yet this morning! waiting for LO's next nap to get one in peace.

should we advertise our new blog on mumsnet and see if we get some fans. he he.

MegBusset · 09/07/2007 11:34

Amber: yes please! I just bought a coconut sponge cake for later. Bugger dieting.

Amberjee · 09/07/2007 11:37

mmm,coconut sponge

Lo has just gone for nap a half hour early because he couldn't last the distance. so off to shower in peace. on the upside at least we'll get to go out of the house earlier today.

going to feed my muffins to the breastfeeding group nearby, figure they might need them.

MegBusset · 09/07/2007 11:50

Just put DS down for second nap of the day after 2 hours awake... he looked so relieved to be put down, and went to sleep within seconds!

but

then the blardy recycling lorry turned up right outside... cue sound of beeping lorry, crunching rubbish, smashing glass, shouty binmen, and woken baby

Back asleep now and binmen have f*ed off so hopefully the nap will continue!

XcupcakemummyX · 09/07/2007 11:51

god i used to hate that

EffiePerine · 09/07/2007 11:51

Bye Tapster: so pleased things have worked out!

Tam: no beating yourself up over the sleep issue . Your DS has got much better over time and I'm sure he'll carry on . I'm starting to think that startling improvements will have to wait until he's in his own room, which won't be before we move towards the end of the year.

Napr are completely up the spout at the moment due to teeth and lack of routine! Hopefully we'll get back there soon.

EffiePerine · 09/07/2007 11:53

Meg: for us it's the door buzzer or the telephone . And if DS has been asleep for more than about 20 mins he will not go off again - cue much swearing!

Blog: haven't had the chance to have a good look yet but keep posting!

EffiePerine · 09/07/2007 11:55

Ginger: sounds like an improvement to me . Have been trying a similar ploy though DS not in his own room. We've gone from in bed from about 1am to in own cot till at least 5 or 6am in about a week.

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