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Original poster

10 week old won’t sleep anywhere but my arms help!!

108 replies

YorkshireMam96 · 13/01/2018 09:23

DS is 10 weeks old and since birth wouldn’t sleep anywhere but in someone’s arms. I was able to lie down and rest (not sleep) with him on my chest or next to me in my arms. As the weeks have progressed, now he will only sleep if I’m sat up holding him in my arms. We’ve had to resort to co-sleeping as he will not touch his cot but he won’t even let me lay him down in the bed with me!! Hellllpppp!!! I’m going insane

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eastlondoner · 13/01/2018 22:12

Hi, this problem magically resolved itself with my daughter when she reached 12 weeks. Hopefully it does for your baby too.

Have you read about the 4th trimester? It's just normal for some babies to want to be held constantly until they're about 3 months old.

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 13/01/2018 22:14

Oly5 I've tried using a hot water bottle and he still hates it. I've done looooaads of research on safe co-sleeping but he doesn't sleep any better with me. He won't let me lay down so I have to sit up all night

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Loz604 · 13/01/2018 22:18

I’m sure you are doing an amazing job! I don’t cope well with sleep so hats off to you. Just a thought... is it possible to place an item of clothing or something with your scent on close by (obviously not in the Moses basket) x

TittyGolightly · 13/01/2018 22:19

And I don’t agree that elevated cortisol in short term causes damage

You have absolutely no way of knowing that, I’m afraid. You can believe it but that doesn’t make it true.

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 13/01/2018 22:20

eastlondoner I have researched about 4th trimester but him sleeping with me isn't working for anyone. I haven't slept longer than an hour are time since I was induced 11 weeks ago. I get no help in the day because everyone around me works full time so it isn't healthy that I keep sitting up with him all day

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AndTheyLivedHappilyEverAfter · 13/01/2018 22:20

my HV is rubbish she I’ve asked her and she just said to wait and he’ll get better. I think he may have reflux but ive tried everything including elevating his crib and trying him
In a Moses basket and he won’t have it"

Visit your GP and ask for medication- Ranitidine really helps my DD.

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 13/01/2018 22:23

Do see your GP then,Rule out any digestive / reflux issues
And give yourself pat on back for the great work you're doing

TammySwansonTwo · 13/01/2018 22:26

Oh I feel your pain. My twins are 16mo now but one of them just wouldn't sleep through the night, held or not. The other wouldn't sleep through the day. No family or friends to help, and I was pumping every two hours as my supply was awful. I barely remember it to be honest, it was such a blur (although one of them didn't come home until he was 8 weeks old so only had one at night initially!).

The things that changed things for us were a rockaroo (my twins were absolutely in love with them which enabled me to keep pumping) and white noise played VERY LOUD through a Bluetooth speaker (e.g. As loud as a running shower). Ewan was no match for these two. Often I'd let them doze off in the swing and then transfer them to their cosleeper (have you tried a co sleeper at all? made a big difference for us).

I totally understand what you're saying about the crying - I can't stand listening to mine cry, it makes me feel physically sick and panicked. It's so difficult.

If it's any consolation, they now get put into their cots with a bottle, left to it and they go to sleep. If they wake up in the night which they usually do, they're given water and left to it and they go back to sleep. It won't always be like this.

Is there anyone you could ask for some support? Totally understand if not as I really didn't have anyone. Have you tried Homestart?

TammySwansonTwo · 13/01/2018 22:28

One other thing - have you experimented to see if raising the head of the cot helps him settle? Will he settle in a swing or bouncer (the babybjorn ones are amazing, got both of mine second hand)? If it's reflux it might be the upright position that's helping rather than the holding.

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 13/01/2018 22:32

I'm going to call on monday. I need to try something. Tammy SwansonTwo He wont sleep in a rocker or a swing. I have a sleepyhead but he wont go in it. I have to physically rock him to sleep he wont even let his dad put him to sleep

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Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 13/01/2018 22:35

He sleeps laid down in my arms so its not being laid down. I've elevated his cot many different ways he just wont settle. The thing that makes me think he has reflux is because when I burp him he gags after for about a minute

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Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 15/01/2018 19:45

Update: I’ve swaddled, warmed up the mattress and put on Ewan the Sheep and it seems to have worked for his naps. He has taken 3 naps in his cot today all over an hour! Progress!!!!!

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Loz604 · 15/01/2018 20:00

Yay! Well done 😊 did you manage any sleep?

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 15/01/2018 20:34

Loz604 Thank you Grin sue o not being able to put him down my house was a pigsty so I managed to do washing and tidy

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SophieGiroux · 16/01/2018 06:48

Excellent news! Which Ewan leg worked out of interest?

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 16/01/2018 10:13

The night time was a night mare he slept from 7:15 and woke up at 10 then he wouldn’t be put back down so it was another night of no sleep and waking up every 30 minutes.

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Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 16/01/2018 10:14

SophieGiroux I only use the back two legs

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KTCluck · 16/01/2018 11:20

Oh I feel for you, my DD was exactly the same! She's so stubborn that letting her cry just wouldn't work, she would be hystericaI and I couldn't stand it. I just kept trying with the Moses basket and once she hit 12 weeks or so she was happier to be put down and I could finally get some proper sleep. It does get easier!

SophieGiroux · 16/01/2018 17:54

I hope you managed to get some good naps today. I got 3 hours out of mine by putting her in a swing, I watched her on the monitor and she stirred after 20 min so I thought that was it and then amazingly she went back to sleep!
It's always hard sleeping yourself isn't it because you never know how long they are going to stay asleep. You wonder whether it's worth trying yourself because if it's really short it makes you feel worse and annoyed.

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 16/01/2018 20:29

We’ve had a little improvement today. He’s taken all his naps by himself in his cot. I’ve been putting him to sleep in his cot awake and he’s been putting himself to sleep which he’s never done. I’m just scared now that tonight is going to be horrid again Confused

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littlemissminor · 16/01/2018 20:34

My DD did this and now sleeps in a Next2Me - all problems have disappeared since we got it!

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 16/01/2018 22:39

I’m still on the fence as to whether to buy a Next2me. It seems like a waste as they only last for 6 months and he’s 3 months in 2 weeks

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littlemissminor · 17/01/2018 09:48

We got ours when she was 3 months and although expensive, it has been worth every penny! We will keep our to use for the future too

Original poster
YorkshireMam96 · 17/01/2018 10:16

I don’t plan on having any more babies so I don’t know if it will be cost effective for me

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StephiD3 · 17/01/2018 11:53

You could always sell it on once you’ve finished using it. We’ve got the Next2Me Dream and it’s massive- I think ours will probably last longer than 6 months!

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