High Needs baby support thread

[LittlePixieMa]

Any of this familiar?

1 baby needs to be constantly held
2 feeds frequently during the day
3 feeds or comfort sucks through the night
4 won't sleep alone
5 HATES the pram and/or car seat
6 takes short naps
7 doesn't like being held / left with others
8 gets bored or over stimulated very quickly

Feeling exhausted and want some support from others with spirited fussy babies

If so join the club

Good to know weaning doesn't make a difference. Had the health visitor tell me it would so I felt the pressure to get her to eat! It's something I know she will do in her own time so am going to try and relax about it...

That's a good night Nails!

This weekend we are trying to sell our house! Got lots of viewers. Which means we need to tidy the house! On very little sleep and with a cold. This is going to be fun isn't it...

Anyone for coffee?
Up every hour last night in floods of tears, he's got a cough and cold. Seems happy enough today no temperature etc but still coughing and snotting. Not sure whether to call the GP or not. ----

Purpleboa I am sure we have posted similar threads about our babies reluctance to sleep... Are you planning on sleep training?

Sugar, I'm not sure. I think we need to but am reluctant to do CIO. Keep hoping it will get better on its own stupidly

Are you planning to?

Hello purple and milk! I'll do a coffee run. I think everyone needs cake too by the sounds of it

We had a nap in his cot today which I'm going to try and get him to do more often. There seems to be a window about 5 mins after he's dropped off in my arms when he's dead to the world and can be moved with no fuss. It's only taken me eight months to learn this!!

This weekend we're seeing family who've just come back from a holiday in India. They've brought back DS a mini maharajah outfit...

Welcome boa. You could be describing my ds. I cosleep with him after his first wake up (which is currently about 30 mins after I put him down, used to be 3 hours) and DH is in the spare room cos he has to drive to London and also gets migranes when he's sleep deprived. Joy! We are planning on jusy hanging in there though and hoping it will get better in its own time and when ds is ready. The gentle sleep book seems to suggest it will! I can't face doing any sleep training. Good luck with house viewings!

captain mini maharaja outfit sounds amazing! Amazing re cot nap too. You know those milestone cards people have. I think we should invent our own. Someone mentioned it further up the thread didn't they? 'Today I had my first cot nap' could be one of them! I tend to use the cot as a play pen but at least that means he is familiar with it I guess!

nails self settling and 11-5:30. Wow! Isn't a 5 hour stretch technically sleeping through?

sugar sorry to hear you have illness too. I took ds to Dr this morning cos I thought he had an ear infection but Dr thinks it's teething. We were up every hour as well. Hope you have a better night tonight.

DS has just fallen asleep on me. Do I risk attempting a cot nap or do I just let him sleep?

Thank you Essie! Yeah, I'm doing the same thing, just hanging in there and hoping it will change so I don't have to do anything! Cos I'm way too exhausted to plan a plan of attack. I figure she can sleep in her cot so she will again! Eek though 30 minutes, I fear we are heading that way. Those few hours were the only time I had for me time and paying attention to my much neglected DH

DD fell asleep during the weekly shop. So I'm in the cafe with cake and coffee while she sleeps. Would be rude to wake her 😁

I'd let him sleep but it depends if you need the loo or not?

Hey everyone!! Welcome all you newbies!!

Baby Pixie is better!! Yay!!!

Junosmum you never know yours may change....... I knew from 2 weeks that he wasn't a 'normal' baby......!! When did everyone else realise they had a high needs monster baby??

Milk woah, you must be knackered. Can't imagine have 2 when this one is soooo spirited!!

Llama did you call the docs? My DS pulls his ears when his teeth hurt....

Purple haha I thought there was a nosy lurker peeking from the curtains!! She sounds pretty high needs!! Much more fun than a dull baby that just gurgles or so I keep telling myself I think by the time I can put DS down he'll no longer need to nap!!

Nails wow, you're so great with the weaning!!! I need to man up and try real food (scared of choking) l, DS gets everything mashed but I known he wants proper man food!!!

Purple careful with sleep training, there's a lot of evidence that methods that use crying raises cortisol and stresses the baby.... The No Cry Sleep Solution has gentle methods that take longer but are kinder XX

Welcome to all the new people!

pixie I think DD was quite feisty from the start! When I was being stitched up after DD was born, she was being held by DP and crying. The midwife said to me 'I haven't heard a baby cry like that in a long time...' 😧
So much changes so quickly juno it's hard to know!
llama I would be excited about the dishwasher being fixed too!
purpleboa I feel your pain! Lots of similarities with my DD there. Since I've been on this thread she's gone from going in the cot for a few hours at night to not settling without me (think this was illness related) now I don't know what to expect each evening! Naps are my main issue, my shoulder is killing me from sling naps. I really do think I need to do something about this!

purple I've done the same in the supermarket, I see it as a small victory that he's asleep and I get to eat cake as well!!

I may go back to slinging him in the evening if the 30 min wake up post putting down continues. He's awash with snot this afternoon so I suspect the reason why we've had a couple of really dire nights is cos he was coming down with this. I dread to think what tonight will bring but at least I know his ear isn't infected so I'll just load up with calpol and baby nurofen and ride it out I guess!

DH just gave him a bath and is now reading him a story and there's no wailing so I'm just enjoying the first few mins peace I think I've had in days!

Bon weekend everyone!

Pixie think we realised around the 4 week mark too. I think it was actually easier back then though as he would fall asleep anywhere and everywhere whilst feeding. Then when the world around him got more interesting this stopped and the monster evolved!

Purple I want to implied some sleep training but haven't got the energy right now. I also read more effective to try from 8 months so we have a little while..

Essie sorry may have missed this on the thread, how old is your LO? My DS has had a couple of ear infections that they related to his teething.

Today has been one of those when I actually felt like I couldn't cope. I had to give him to DP and close the door on the world today. Everything is a constant battle which I feel like I'm losing. I know he's under the weather but even when he's well normal things are such a huge task, from changing his nappy to dressing him. He's never happy. It breaks my heart that I have such an unhappy baby. Sorry for the rant, my head feels like it may explode today..

Sugars sorry it's been a bad day. I've said for fucks sake a lot at the constant moaning.

Do you have chocolate and wine?

Sending you hugs Sugar. Can get too much sometimes can't it xxx

Well I've had an awful evening. DH has been out. I tried putting DS to sleep at 8pm, he fed then wanted to play. Then turned into a monster and kept biting my shoulder, then waned to feed but kept clamping down on my nipple very hard. He screamed when I delatched him. He bit me so hard at one point I screamed, which must have scared him as then he wouldn't stop crying. Arghhhhh!! Finally got him to sleep at 9.15

Pixie you poor thing! Does he have teeth? Even without teeth it's painful!

Nails having a small glass to relax the stresses! Thank you

Currently on the third wake up after going down at 7 tonight is going to be a long night!

My mum text me earlier and offered to take DS tomorrow so I have some me time, bath, wash my hair which hasn't been done for 9 days...

for sugar. It can be so hard can't it? I've been there too. Can you pass DS to DP, let him do the cuddles etc for a bit and run yourself a bath? That tends to be my escape when I've had enough.

Sorry to hear little pixie was playing up pixie I think we need signs for them: it is BEDTIME not PLAYTIME!

I think we realised we had a higher needs baby after a few sessions at my mothers group. No one else was using a sling, the other babies would be shushed and rocked and placed happily to snooze in their pram (whereas DS snoozed only on me and raised merry hell if I showed him the pram) and everyone else was having much more success with cots and sleeping than us.

It's hard to know how much is general parent boasting exaggerating and what's truth though. One mum complained she has to wake her daughter at 8am for a morning feed after she's slept the whole night through and asked what we were all doing with our days to keep ourselves busy as her DD slept most of the time in her cot This baby also falls asleep in her high chair after a meal so they have bought a reclining one for her. She is a gorgeous little thing but polar opposite to DS!

Morning everyone....

DD wouldn't let me put her down last night. She was over tired and now I know she's definitely teething! I ended up having an early night with her. I hardly see DP at the moment! 😔

sugar I hope you are taking your mum up on that offer! It's so overwhelming at times.

captain I can't even imagine having a baby like that, it seems unreal I keep telling myself DD will sleep like a champ when she's a toddler, what gets everyone else through the days?!

Has anyone achieved cot naps?? If so, how? DD leans to one side during sling naps and my arm feels like it's going to fall off!

Db4d ds also likes to lean to the side for naps!

It's so interesting how many similarities they share

Captain - wow I can't imagine having a baby like that! I have a friend similar, her son sleeps from 7-7. During the 4 month regression he had a couple of nights where he didn't and she said she didn't know how she would cope because she was exhausted... I was abit imagine having my baby!

Death I took my mum up on her offer and had abit of me time. Ended up taking DS to our walk in center as he's really coughing and wheezy but she said there's no infection of the chest just his tonsils are red and swollen! He's currently going down now with this probably won't last

How's everyone getting on this evening? Wine?

Sugar thanks for the wine. yes he has 5 teeth! Ouch! Not sure how to stop the biting.......

Db4d we're waiting for you to succeed in cot naps and then tell us how!!!

Haha, I came home from teaching a class today, DH was winging how his back hurts from a sling nap. He said 'you need to do daily cot naps so I can put him down when I nap him' Like I haven't tried I've actually given up now as it means I can be lazy and watch to instead of hoovering and why can't he try himself?!!!!! Think he doesn't want the stress of trying!!

Llama how is your DS and the ear pulling?

Pixie 5?! I'm not sure il continue feeding him when he has teeth.. I want my nipple to stay in tact.. Will have to find an alternate way to send him to sleep when that time comes!

DP said similar to me.. You need to stop feeding him to sleep as I can't put him down.. I wish it was that Easy! Lol. It's the only way he goes down and I don't have the heart or stamina to do any CC!