4 month sleep regression- oh.my.god.

[hazel88]

So my DD has just hit the 4 month sleep regression hard. It sucks. It really sucks. for a short while she had been doing 6 hour chunks for the first part of the night followed by 1 or 2 wakings after. On the rare occasion she would just wake up once for a feed then that was it. BLISS. She's now waking up more times than I can count and I'm wondering if she'll ever sleep better again. I know about the 4 month sleep regression inside-out but would really appreciate experiences from others who have either gone through it or are going through it. I need some sanity restored...please?!

Whereismy, oh no

I too have begged DP at times to stay home and he has. I've been crying down the phone telling him I can't do it anymore. Even 1 day where he stays home and takes over all care of DD has made a big difference in the past. I feel like I can breathe, recharge my batteries and start again.

With re to light...we have blackout curtains from The Range and close them at every nap and for bedtime. We do most nappy changes downstairs during the day apart from when I check her after a nap so she knows the bedroom is for sleeping.

With re to feeding to sleep, during the day if she's dropping off on the bottle I jiggle her around and talk to her to keep her awake, then burp her and then take her up for a nap straight after so she knows that during the day she can't feed to sleep. The bedtime bottle she often drops off though and I've learnt my lesson not to do the same thing as she then refuses to sleep! I just let her drop off then she rouses as I get up from the bed and burp her then put her down.

DD is already on her 2nd nap - been up since 5.15

Hazel , he just put a sock in ! I was r very pleased with his domestic skills ! Just rocking dd constantly as she naps in car seat , she seems so awake ! Ds keeps waking her up with his noisy toys. I need to start trying the cot. I have the wonder weeks app, it's very interesting.
I remember having breakdown days with my ds, the first time is a massive shock to the system , nobody tells you how hard it actually is .
I still swaddle dd , sometimes I find a hand popping out so she can escape it.
My dds sleep got worse after the 12 week jabs, I think it was a couple of days after . Hope you are not feeling to tired today . I need more coffee but can't as breastfeeding ,don't want to see her even more wakeful sending you all thanks for all your help xx

hazel thanks that makes me feel slightly better! I feel like a right twit now it's daylight and everything's relatively calm, but I'm so glad he's home today.
Is your DD still fussing today? I find that really tricky, my DD is usually so chirpy and it's sad when they're not themselves isn't it!

Sycamore that sounds like quite a settled night, fingers crossed you've cracked it! Yeah I agree, massive shock, and I still find lots of people with kids/babies look at me like I've sprouted another head if I say it's so hard.

I covered our bedroom window today, til I can get some blackout curtains, and DD's next nap was a whole 50 mins!!! Which I think is ideal - not too long like yesterday's, long enough for me to have my 1st bath since she was born!
Just put her down again, properly swaddled this time, if she can do another 50 mins I'll feel like I've reached the pinnacle of motherhood, we'll see.

I rang my HV earlier, hoping she'd identify something I'm doing really wrong but she couldn't really suggest much, should prob feel reassured but would love someone to tell me 'no, do this instead!' ha I guess that's cheating though!

Oh, spoke too soon, exactly 30 mins again! Hmmmm

our HV is absolute crap!! her nickname in our house is 'chocolate teapot'. Yep, DD is quite fussy today. there's alot of mouth and nose rubbing with alot of drooling now, maybe it's teething as well she dribbled loads in her sleep when I was out so I used my napkin to wipe it, only to smear a load of ketchup over her face

I totally sympathise with you on the DP being at home. whenever mine does I'm like honestly she's not normally this calm!! I always struggle the most after a shitty night then have to face the day alone. I've seen many posts on here about women feeling suicidal when they're struggling with their LO, you're not alone to feel low when things get really tough. it's only natural.

I think all of my friends but 1 have had dream babies, so when I've been honest and open about how I feel they look and speak to me like I'm overreacting and that's just what babies are like. DD had colic and had reflux, and is now going through this- none of their LOs have. when my dr or HV asks how I'm feeling I'm not honest as I know they'll slap the PND label on it which it isn't. if anyone has a baby who has colic or then doesn't sleep they too will have days when they fall apart, it's HUMAN!!

I understand what you mean too about it being awful to see them unlike their usual self. DD has not long got over colic and was then such a happy little baba. however today she just seems sad and absent praying we all have better nights tonight

Hello, can I join?

DD is 5 mos old today but was 2 weeks early so seemed to hit her regression at 4.5 mos. it's been 2-3 w of it now - argh! I am going back to work FT in August and dreading feeling like this!

Last two nights she has been much easier to settle, and not woken till I go up to her at 11.30. Then dream feed and back down without a murmur. I keep thinking yes, I've cracked it! But then from about 2am it's every 90 min.

I'm bfing so just feeding back to sleep ATM. I keep having what DH calls 3 am resolutions where I suddenly say, this is ridiculous! She had milk 1.5 hours ago! I will rock her till she sleeps but no milk!

.....then 20 min of rocking and screaming later I give in

Hi revoltingpeasant, welcome!

My (rather useless) HV suggested that if baby is waking every 90 minutes it's more like that they're not able to get themselves back to sleep once the 90 minute sleep cycle ends. Do you always put your LO down to sleep asleep or drowsy? It's gone out of the window most of the time at the moment during this regression, but before I was making sure I put DD down semi - awake, eyes gradually closing, then placing a hand on her tummy or chest and shushing until she went to sleep, I found she had less wake ups this way

Hi revolting peasant , welcome to misery loves company thread !
DD is chewing like crazy and I have got through so many bibs today with all the drool.
I am dreading tonight . DD can't self settle but like last night slept for 4 hours without needing me but after 130am she can't settle herself and I keep feeding her to sleep ( I know I know ) .
Good luck tonight ! Xx

Sycamore it's always after the first chunk that things go pear shaped isn't it?! I'm dreading it too tonight. DD has been so unsettled all afternoon, soaked in dribble and only being happy when you're stood up holding her. Dosed her up on calpol but it hasn't done anything. She keeps choking on all of the saliva in her mouth. Hufffff tonight is going to be a rough one I reckon

Wishing everyone a peaceful night! Will update soon x

and I'm with you on the feeding to sleep at the moment - anything that will work!!

Yes Hazel the second part of the night is always rough !DD is the same , I think I may give her calpol on the first wake up. Can't have teething pain too.
I am not fooled by one ok ish night as this has happened before and the next night was worse .
Good luck !

It lasted two years for my first baby

Blank expression , how did you cope for two years? Did you try any sleep training ?

Blank arrrrggghhhhhhhh!

Thanks hazel that makes me feel better, yeah a few meltdowns are allowed eh. Sorry to hear you had colic to deal with too, that's rough. at ketchup face!
I've wondered about teething too as DD constantly has her fists jammed in her mouth, hope you get some joy with the Calpol tonight

Same here with the 2nd part of the night. We look after DD in shifts as DH doesn't work til late morning, so he has her til about 1/2am while she snoozes peacefully (usually), then when he brings her in to me she'll be up every hour. I feed to sleep too, she's always hungry as she'll only take 3/5 of her milk during the day.

Going to attempt dinner now, having put DD down for the 7th time...
Good luck all!

I read somewhere they have their deepest sleep from 9pm until 1am so this could explain why they can't settle the second part of the night .
I had to give calpol as dd refusing to feed and melting down , she always feeds at this time of night . She is currently asleep on me , I am waiting until she is in a feel sleep to transfer her to sleepyhead . You would think I would know better with my second child re bad habits but it's about survival at the moment !

Absolutely it's just about survival at the moment! You just have to do anything in order to get through this phase. Remember, we got this, we can do it!

Whereismy....7 times, man that's rough Poor you.

I've heard loads of times about teething coinciding with this wonder week and the 4 month sleep regression. They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!!

DD2 is 1 next week, slept beautifully from 8 weeks old up until about 2 months ago, she's waking about 6 times a night now, she's cut 6 teeth in the past month, I'm shattered, I feel your pain op.

Hi all.... Yeah well I USED to put DD down awake but sleepy. I used to chuck her in her cot and go and brush my teeth and when I came back she'd be asleep.

Now, not so much

I fed to sleep tonight - it just happened! But I'd say I put her down awake about 50% of the time. Makes bugger all difference as far as I can see.

Yes, agree about the sleep cycles! But what to do? I am right on it as soon as she stirs in the night with dummy and shushing. But she just screeches until she's fed.

So dunno if she is genuinely hungry or just distressed as she can't settle without milk.

missymoomoo your poor DD that's so hard and poor you- you must be like a zombie!!

Revolting peasant I know what you mean about thinking she can't be hungry- DD had 3 feeds in 3 hours last night and she's formula fed taking on average 4oz per feed last night. I thought 'surely she's not hungry'...but nothing else worked to settle her so I too gave in trying really hard not to make it a habit but I said on the previous post, it's all about getting through it and survival at the mo, you've got to do whatever works!

hope everyone (including babies) is getting some much - needed rest x

I bet I look like 1 too ha ha, I'm back at work too, although none this week, she's just nodded off, I'd like to say until the morning but I know it won't be x

Morning all, hope everyone had a good night? How did it go?

DD went down on the first attempt at 7, then woke at 11:30 for a feed and a top up of calpol (suspected teething), woke at 1 as she couldn't get back off to sleep, again at 3:30 for a feed, then 4:30 wide awake so in to our bed to try and squeeze out a little more sleep! So 4 wake ups in 11 hours- aside from the other night we haven't had a night that good in weeks! I never thought I'd consider 4 wake ups to be a great night, but after the previous night of 10 I welcomed just 4! We crept in to bed about 9 and from then I barely slept, all night I was poised on the edge of the bed ready to leap up to settle DD before she woke just so she could try and get some decent sleep! I was up and down like a yoyo placing my hand on her as she stirred but she went right back off again, it was great!!

So although I've had about 2 or 3 hours broken sleep I'm still feeling great as I wasn't up rocking and feeding all night and so happy DD was more settled. She has her 4m vaccinations today so I imagine we'll be right back to a shitty night tonight! Keeping everything crossed for another good one though.

Hope everyone had a good night and are feeling a little more rested.

Hi everyone, hope things are improving for everyone?

missymooomoo wow that sounds hard, how did you get on last night in the end?

hazel how much milk is your DD drinking in the daytime? Mine has 5x 6oz per 24h, 3 in the day and 2 at night. She doesn't seem ready to change yet, I can't even get an extra 2oz into her before bed so I guess I've got to lump it for now!
Sounds like a much better night, well done! Even though you didn't have much sleep I bet it's made all the diff not picking DD up, really hope she's starting to break the pattern, and she must be feeling loads better too which is brill.

Our night was fairly bonkers, DD woke every 2h as usual, but woke at 3.30 screaming her head off for ages, we've no idea why! Poor thing. She eventually fed to sleep, woke up as I put her down, but I left her to it for the 1st time ever, and she went back to sleep!!! (Does it still count as self settling if I rocked the basket for 25mins? I'm saying yes!)

We've been out today and she's still managed to get 2 naps in which is quite unusual, so at least she remembers how without all the white noise etc!

Afternoon everyone. She went sleep at 10.30. We were up at 7 she woke a couple of times but not as many. She's had a 2 hour nap this morning and is currently asleep again

No idea what my plan of action for this evening is yet.

I wonder if I should try her on cows milk now? I feel like baby milk isn't satisfying her now.

whereismy- DD has 6 bottles taking variable amounts but on average probably about 7 oz. She's taken 8.5oz at bedtime for quite a while. hahaha we always use white noise too but DD doesn't need it while out although when I've been desperate I've used it

I'm sure DD is teething. She's been sobbing this afternoon and has slept on me for the first time in ages. she keeps waking sobbing too Poor thing. She's needing mummy cuddles.

hoping for good night's all round tonight!