4 month sleep regression- oh.my.god.

[hazel88]

So my DD has just hit the 4 month sleep regression hard. It sucks. It really sucks. for a short while she had been doing 6 hour chunks for the first part of the night followed by 1 or 2 wakings after. On the rare occasion she would just wake up once for a feed then that was it. BLISS. She's now waking up more times than I can count and I'm wondering if she'll ever sleep better again. I know about the 4 month sleep regression inside-out but would really appreciate experiences from others who have either gone through it or are going through it. I need some sanity restored...please?!

Morning ladies

ohthegoats - its reassuring to hear that your DD's sleep improved without any need for intervention. Im starting to believe that they will just grow up...and sleeping will improve on its own.
In the past couple days my DD has gone from waking every hour without fail, to maybe only once or twice a night. Is sleeping stretches of 4 hours and will fall asleep with just a bit of a rock/pat. Her naps have also naturally extended. She was a classic 20-30minute catnapper, but just lately she'll have 2x 1.5hr naps in a day plus a 45 minute. Ive still fed her to sleep and co slept when necessary - again its just riding it out, sleeping when they do and lots of coffee indeed. I dont think this is it indefinitely - I expect rough nights still, but I do think she's a starting to come out on the other side finally.
Sorry ive not had a chance to reply to your messages individually, had some really shitty news this week! But it sounds like your all doing fine. Keep hope, it does get better! Do whatever you have to to get by! X

mariloulou so sorry to hear you've had some bad news

That's amazing about DD's sleep, I'm so happy for you and feel reassured as what your LO has gone through and how her sleep has improved so well sounds typical of the 4m regression to whuch there is an end! Really hope you're over it now and can finally get some much-needed rest!

So did you make any changes at all throughout? Did you co-sleep alot, feed any more or rock any more etc? What did you do during the wake ups? Did you stick to usual feeding times and just put DD back to sleep?Has everything just changed naturally?

Yep, 8 months. And 30th May was the worst night of the lot, so it might not slowly get better, it might just happen randomly 'overnight' so to speak. Went from awake every half hour on 30th, to awake twice between 7pm and 7am on 2nd. She's been like that ever since, last night was food at 11.30, then awake for more at 5am. Back to sleep for an hour, now banging my head with a rubber duck, so probably we're up now!

I think it's controlled crying or patience. Be aware that patience may be for years.

Sorry hazel I didn't see your message before mine!
Ive made little change as far as I can see. Ive still got some bad habits that im truing to resolve but as it stands, DD wakes early,like your DD. Always has done. AnyAnywhere from 5-6am. Usually 5.30 though. Shes asleep an hour later. I usually rock her or push in pushchair. Shes been napping over an hour just lately. If shes stirred ever so slightly ill rock the pram a little more and shes off. ( she doesn't open her eyes during a stir )
she will have porridge, which shes had from 4 months, and after 2 hours ill feed 7oz bottle and ill either rock or pram again for a sleep. Ive recently introduced a small lunch, which she will have around 12.30-1pm. Then it's bottle at 3-3.30pm 7oz and sleep again. Dinner at 5, bath at 6, bed by 7 with final 7oz and usually she will fall asleep with it. Ive had that loose routine for months but its only just recently its structured out abit.Again this happened naturally.
When times were rough and she woke alot during the night,I would try hand on tummy,then DD on side with patting, then rocking and putting back in cot and if that didn't work I would co sleep. I actually didnt Co sleep that much, if I did it was only part way through the night, say after 2am. She tends to become a little more unsettled from then.
I try to get as much fresh air down her lungs during the day, yesterday we spent 1.5hrs at the park, though she didn't sleep for much of it I believe theres something inthe air ththat helps!
ive stopped reading those god awful "how to fiz your baby" books and just went with it. My more relaxed approach felt better all round. DH reminded me every night that it won't be like this forever - and it wont. Yes some babies seem to struggle with sleep for months and months and perhaps sometimes a helping hand is needed but alot of the time it sorts itself. The worst point for us was exactly around 16-17 weeks. It was just ridiculous then. Now at 21 weeks im definitely seeing a bit of let up. Im still going to feed to sleep if it happens and ill probably still rock her if needed. For now it works, not always ideal but thats another bridge hey :)

Did you use CC ohthegoats?

mariloulou that's great,,thanks for the advice

We're at 17 weeks and past week has definitely been the worst. HELL! I feel like everything you said a few days ago is me at the moment- considering cc as I'm so desperate but I just can't bring myself to do it. She's too tiny and needs her mama. It easy to feel like you can't cope anymore or that this will never end when you're in the thick of it,,but I bet it's easier to see a more positive perspective when it begins to come right

Just tried to have a nap when DD did but by the time I nodded off she was up again!

Morning all

mariloulou sorry to hear you've had bad news, but it's really great your DD is sleeping better, really hope you're coming out the other side now then. Great that it all seems to have happened naturally, every chance she'll keep going in the right direction!
Particularly reassured to hear about the naps, I wonder if being more structured with feeds is what's going to do it for us, when she's ready!

hazel so sorry to hear you had a bad night. Sleep deprivation is so, so hard, and 7 times is a lot. It won't always be this bad, DD won't be able to sustain it! Will you be able to catch up on sleep over the weekend?

re the snacking, are you already using faster flowing teats? I tried them a couple of weeks ago and they made DD dribble too much, but might give them another go. Just wondering if it'll help with full feeds / taking more in the day.

Whereismy thanks for the advice. You make a really good point about the teats- DD has recently started having a lot of wind when feeding despite using the Dr browns bottles, I hadn't thought of getting bigger teats. it's on my shopping list for today along with a sleeping bag as covers do not stay on!

Yes hopefully a little catch up time on sleep will be on the cards over the weekend as DP is able to do more night duty over the weekend!

How was your night? Better I hope?

Nooooo, no CC here. I worked fairly hard on making sure she will nap in her cot if we're at home, but that was done by having her SO close to sleep by the time I put her down, that she didn't really have a choice but to keep sleeping. Trial and error though, and probably took 2 months. I also read a lot about gradual retreat, but gave up within a couple of days and just carried on rocking her to sleep and putting her down after that.

www.bartshealth.nhs.uk/our-services/services-a-z/h/health-visiting/for-patients/sleep/

I've just been reading this if anyone is interested in sleep techniques. Scroll down to the bottom and click on the link 'sleep training techniques'.

Just tried the bigger teats and she took a lot more in one go! thanks for the idea! still fussy after the bottle but at least she took more and she didn't spill a drop!

Hi all ,
Mariloulou , really pleased you are getting some good quality sleep.
Hazel , you must be shattered , poor you. Thank you for the link , I will take a look.
Last night was much of the same as the night before accept my ds woke at midnight to add to the nights events ! He was complaining he is was to hot ! How will we survive with this forthcoming heat wave ?Got him settled and then dd woke at 1230 and 220am and then up around 520am so I fed her in bed .
Weirdly she has napped really well today .
I
Wonder long we can cope with all this sleep deprivation ! I feel terrible today , very run down.
Hope you are all ok
X

Hi all,

hazel that's great about the teats, yay! Going to try ours again tomorrow. We had a slightly better night last night but mainly due to DH having today off, so he stayed up to do a v late night shift.
I attempted to put DD down for 1h 15mins this eve, she did the usual fall asleep on me then thrashing about as soon as I put her down, I gave up when my back couldn't take any more, sent DH in and he settled her in 9 mins oh well!

sycamore sorry you had another bad night, really hope you get a beter sleep tonight and maybe manage to get a nap yourself over the weekend? Poor DS, I am dreading the heatwave too!

Aaargh spoke too soon, she's awake again!

Sorry to hear you're feeling crappy Sycamore and that you had a shitty night too. Hope you're able to get a break over the weekend.

It was so hot last night wasn't it? DD was sweaty and irritable throughout the night. I've bought a 1 tog sleeping bag for her which is pretty much a cotton sheet and I've removed all of the blankets from the cot, hoping it makes a difference!

The other day you said your hearing had gone funny which was probably due to feeling so run down, how is that now? I had it too this morning when I got up. Only lasted a couple of minutes but was weird.

Haven't managed any rest at all today and the place is a pigsty. Hufffff

Hang in there, hope you have a better night

Whereismy I definitely jinx myself when I say good things about DD's sleep haha.

The other day I boasted to the DP that I put her down in 4 minutes....then WAAAAAA!!

I read some research that proved if over quite a long period of time Dad gets up with baby during the night that they stop waking so much. Hmmm if only it were Dad's always getting up through the night we might all be able to get a bit more shut eye eh?!

Whereismy , thank you ! Typical daddy settles baby so quickly :-) i think sometimes it works as they want mummy to hang around .

Hazel , yes was really hot last night and sticky ! Dd went to bed in a vest and a cotton swaddle , she won't settle without a swaddle but worried she will be to hot , its 22 in there at the moment. My hearing is still a little fuzzy , like I am congested . May go to the doctors next week,

Do your dds take dummy's? Dd has just started taking one but wondering if I should remove it when she is asleep so she doesn't get use to it throughout the night . What do you ladies do?
I hope you all get some rest this weekend. Thank you for getting me through this ! You are all such good support

Dd went to bed at 8 and I am back in there already !

Sycamore this site really does allow some good support doesn't it? I mean, it's a group of women who you've never met before but are going through the same thing and know just how you're feeling. It certainly makes you feel better to know you're not alone.

it's 22 in our room too, I have the fan at the ready!

Luckily DD has never been bothered about a dummy but we've used it alot during the witching hour in the past and have tried it again at the moment to try and help sleep. She keeps it in briefly but as soon as she starts nodding off it falls out. It often wakes her if I try to put it in to be honest. I don't know if it helps or not. Obviously I'd rather she didn't need it but I'm happy to go with anything at the mo!

Aaaaaaand she's awake

Wow. What a night. Every night I think it can't get any worse but amazingly, it does!! She was up a few times just after putting her down, then about an hour before her feed was due, then probably about 7 wake ups again with one where she stayed awake for an hour wide awake and refusing to sleep. 3 nappy changes in an hour, and ready to get up at 5am.

Thank the Lord for DP who told me to go in the other room so I did for a couple of hours. I felt too guilty being in there all night so had 2 hours, 2 hours uniterrupted sleep and it was bliss I tell you! I can't imagine what I'd feel like if she went 4 hours! He also did most of the getting up with DD although I was still awake. It's so nice to have the support there.

Last night does make me feel as though this is just a phase, as she fed a lot better yesterday and we stuck to her 2 night feeds which she took most of but not all. it wasn't hunger. It wasn't teeth as she wasn't upset. She didn't want to be in our bed. She just couldn't sleep. Her total nap time was under 3 hours yesterday so we moved bedtime a little earlier. Her brain just seems too wired at the moment to sleep.

At 5 when she woke I tried getting her back down but it wouldn't work so I put her in the cot with her Slumber Buddy Butterfly projector on while I lay in bed. Then all of a sudden the music came on and DP and I looked at each other thinking 'what the hell?!' DD had only gone and pushed the right button for the music haha it repeated the same song for about 10 minutes before she hit it again and it switched off...guessing she doesn't like that song then

I've now got her up and put her on the bed only for her to roll from back to front indepetenly! She's does this once before but that was a while ago.

Hope everyone else had a better night than us!

Also, it got to around 25 in our room last night, it was SO hot! So the fan went on and DD had to sleep in a vest. And next week is going to be hotter, great!!

Morning ,

I typed a really long message last night but somehow managed to erase it all before posting! So annoying .
Hazel . It is a massive support to have you ladies to chat too. Sleep deprivation is so hard. My moods are so up and down due to lack of sleep. Saturday is our day to go out as a family and it frustrates me how exhausted I feel.
Hazel , sorry to hear about your rough night sounds really rough but so pleased your dh helped you out !try and rest today .
My night was awful too , so many wake ups but I think it was the heat and the fact she is use to bring swaddled ( took it off as it was to hot )
Just heard ds wake up so I have to go , will post more later ... Coffee

Oh no, sorry to hear you had a crappy one are you able to swaddle with just a nappy on or is it still too hot?

Think I will try a nappy and swaddle tonight . Not looking forward to this heat wave !! On a positive note ds didn't have any bad dreams last night!

oh hazel that is crappo, especially when you can't pinpoint a reason, so frustrating. They're so tiny and there's probably a million things buzzing round their heads (I've also described my DD as wired and hyper at times, told the HV at 6 weeks I may as well be feeding her espresso!) but it's just so hard, you're not expecting miracles, just a long nap would do it eh! and really hoping for a better night tonight!
That's great your DP is on the case though, you shouldn't feel too guilty about taking a few hours in the other room, it's in everyone's interests for you to refuel!! You prob don't feel like it but it sounds like you're managing so well under the circumstances

The heat is doing my head in too, and we live in a block and there are parties nearly every Fri/Sat night, so having the windows wide open meant it was really noisy Our room was 27 degrees last night! No more swaddling for us! DD is a grumpy mess today.

sycamore sorry you had a bad night, the heat is so hard. Hope you get some rest too!

Whereismy . The heat at night is annoying and it's only going to get worse this week, we are not equipped for this kind of weather ! Poor babies really suffer .
Hazel - I really hope you have a better night tonight. My dd didn't feed much today . She has started to get distracted when we are out , this prob means more pesky wake ups tonight . I feed her every time she wakes as I am breast feeding and doctor said little and often due to her reflux. If she is still waking a lot next week I may try some top up
Formula, we have been prescribed aptimal pepti.
This will get better , it did with ds and then we will be on here chatting about the 9th month regression!
Hope you also got some rest xx

Thanks whereismy

This heat is just too much dreading next week when it's even hotter.

wishing everyone better nights all round x