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Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

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Original poster

Sleep training starts next week.

31 replies

LucyB1 · 29/01/2015 16:06

I'm going to try to teach my 6 month old dd to self settle after being fed to sleep her whole life. My plan is to make her story after her feed. Put her in her cot with bedtime music we always use and sit next to her patting sighing and holding her hand. Does that sound ok? Any tips welcome'

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laurenfalvey · 29/01/2015 22:09

That sounds fab! There is no more you can do. Good luck :) xx

Original poster

LucyB1 · 30/01/2015 00:32

It has to work. I'm sitting here in tears as this is the fifth time I've been up tonight and its only half 12. I'm shattered already and she just. Won't. Settle.

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chloecorey2013 · 30/01/2015 01:15

Ill join you for support? I have a 13 month old baby who i have co slept with since nearly birth and wont go in his cot. It starts officially sunday night, as he is at my mums all weekend

Original poster

LucyB1 · 30/01/2015 08:06

Ahh Chloe I feel your pain. We gave up last night and brought her in bed. Can you let me know what you go and if it works? We plan to start thurs so dh is not to tired for work.

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chloecorey2013 · 30/01/2015 15:29

I tried it wednesday but didnt want to admit i gave up and he ended up in bed i litrally dont know where to strart, nothing works with my devil child haha.

chloecorey2013 · 01/02/2015 18:50

Taking him up too bed in ten! Will fill u in in the mornin how many times i had to put him back in his cot.

Im going with the get him to sleep on me then puttin him in cot when down method. Then just putting him back every time he wakes up.

chloecorey2013 · 01/02/2015 18:51

Wish me luck!

Original poster

LucyB1 · 01/02/2015 20:00

Good luck Chloe. Let me know how it goes!

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FATEdestiny · 01/02/2015 20:27

Lucy

If your LO has always been fed to sleep, would giving him something to suck on help him self-sooth? I'm thinking dummy.

Original poster

LucyB1 · 01/02/2015 20:32

Tied that fate. No go I'm afraid.

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Poolbirthx2 · 01/02/2015 20:36

Watching this post!
I have tried a couple of times with my dd who is 9 months. Have co slept since about 3 months. I have tried everything and nothing works ?? i will give bottle, put down in cot and as soon as she touches the mattress she screams, even when i or my dh or sat next to cot patting, shushing - i always give up and bring in with us just for some sleep

Will be watching this post for any i ideas

Good luck to everyone trying x

FATEdestiny · 01/02/2015 20:44

I am pretty sure my DD would scream the moment she got in the cot if she didn't have something soothing to suck. What about fingers, thumb, hand, a toy, muslin square? A sleep prop may help.

Original poster

LucyB1 · 02/02/2015 19:17

Any update Chloe?

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LouLouF · 03/02/2015 12:54

Has anyone had any luck? I'm in the same boat... DD nearly 6 months old and has always been fed to sleep. She's waking up through the night every couple of hours now, I'm knackered! She will not take a dummy either. She also sleeps in my our bed (bf so easiest option for me!). Would like to move her into her own bed but sort out the self soothing first. Ive tried some methods already but they haven't worked not wanting to leave her to cry herself to sleep either!

Original poster

LucyB1 · 03/02/2015 15:54

What have you tried loulou?

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LouLouF · 03/02/2015 17:06

I've tried feeding or rocking until she gets drowsy but still awake then putting her down and sshhh/patting her, then pick up/put down if she cries to calm her. Have also tried taking her off the breast just before she falls asleep.. This sometimes works, but is so hard in middle of the night when trying not to fall asleep myself! At the moment I'm trying to feed her while listening to lullabies and giving her a comforter, so then (hopefully!) I can gradually reduce the feeding time and she can associate the music/teddy with falling asleep? Also, I'm planning to stop bf soon so this might make a difference, but again I want to do this gradually!

FATEdestiny · 03/02/2015 17:29

There is nothing wrong in accepting that you have a gentle attachment parenting style and so as such you are your baby's source of comfort (co-sleeping, feeding to sleep, baby wearing, rocking, holding etc etc)

Without changing your entire parenting style (which may well cause a lot of upset to both you and baby) then self settling may not be feasible for a long time to come.

I don't mean to be doom and gloom in this. Attachment parenting is very important to some people so having realistic expectations may be useful.

The alternate is more routine based parenting - sleep is based on props, triggers, timing and autonomous settling.

Original poster

LucyB1 · 03/02/2015 21:00

I don't want to be an attachment parent any more!! I want my body back. #touchedout!!!!

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FATEdestiny · 03/02/2015 21:34

That is the main difficulty and to be blunt, it's just not going to be easy no matter how you dress it up.

Your baby has always used you as a source of comfort and so if you now want to change, you need to really work hard at giving your baby something else as a replacement for your comfort in order to get to sleep.

I would strongly recommend persevering with a dummy as a comfort suck. Your baby will find it really hard and distressing to not have anything to comfort suck to sleep if this is what she has always done.

LouLouF · 04/02/2015 16:25

I would love it if she took a dummy! She has taken one on a few occasions but not recently.. That's why I thought a comforter might be a good idea. The rocking/feeding her to sleep wouldn't be a problem but she's waking up every 2 hours, every 45mins on a bad night ( think that might have been because she was teething though).. I can cope with that just now, but will be going back to work soon

Original poster

LucyB1 · 05/02/2015 19:48

It sounds like we are in the same position loulou. I want to stop breast feeding too. Dd won't take a bottle though. Planning on replacing bf with food. What's your plan?

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LouLouF · 05/02/2015 21:37

That's now my plan too Lucy! DD has always taken a bottle at night since she was about 6 weeks, but for the past 2weeks she's started refusing it! Just as I was planning on moving her on to formula I've given her a sippy cup and sometimes she takes it, sometimes not. I've got a night out on Saturday so I'm hoping she takes the bottle from DH with me not being there, or I can see me getting a phone call to come home if he's got a hungry baby that he can't get to sleep lol!

Original poster

LucyB1 · 05/02/2015 21:44

A night out?? Sounds like bliss. I must get her weaned off me soon or else!!!

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timeforsleepnow · 05/02/2015 21:56

Good luck Lucy! We are starting some sleep training with 7.5month old dd tomorrow.

Becky2208 · 06/02/2015 12:55

We're in the same position, DS is 7mo and has always fed to sleep. I want to stop bf ready to go back to work, but he will only occasionally take a bottle, and never from me. He's been waking every 2 hours for weeks, sometimes he'll take a dummy, most of the time he won't. I'm on my knees with exhaustion. Typically, he did his first 4 hour stretch in weeks last night, but I was up all night with food poisoning. Definitely interested to hear what's worked for others. Good luck all!

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