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Original poster

SLEEP REGRESSION part 2...Roll up, roll up folks! Swap tales of woe, ideas, enjoy solidarity and get support here

999 replies

cakebaby · 27/02/2014 20:05

Thought I'd start a new thread as I couldn't see another one yet (will get HQ to delete if already up and running).

Tis good to talk.....

OP posts:
missmargot · 18/06/2014 21:54

I think putting him in the living room is a great idea, anything to help you both get some sleep and really no different to him being in his own bedroom.

I don't blame you for going for the easiest option, I know how exhausting DS is and I can't imagine having a toddler too.

K1spoony · 19/06/2014 04:04

So, just when everything seemed to be getting better I'm having one of those nights! Last night I got 8-6, with one feed at 10.30! Was so excited as dd had been getting better every night. Well, tonight I have lost track of how many times I've been in to resettle, it was 3 within the first hour of her going to bed. Maybe it's the heat, but she doesn't feel too hot, but the room thermometer is 24.5 which I guess is pretty warm. There have been a lot of break ins near me, so in worried to leave the window open once we're all in bed cos her room is at the back. Ah, the dilemmas!

Mirrhi · 19/06/2014 08:02

The first morning since I can remember that DS sleeps past 6.15am and what happens? DP sets his alarm for 6.30, then decides not to get up then, and DSS decides for the first time ever he wants to get up by his akarm so sets it for 6.45 at full volume! GAH!

keepitgoing · 19/06/2014 09:44

feek I couldn't cope with back and forth myself. I sleep in dd's room after her first wake up..

mirrhi gah!!

k1 there will be ups and downs for a million reasons but hopefully the good nights get more. last night dd kept dozing and waking though not crying between 3&4.40... argh. but then slept till 7 where it's been 0530 recently

Mirrhi · 19/06/2014 10:10

I can't do this. 40 minutes of him getting more and more distressed despite me keeping the times short between comforting him. I can't do it. Itjust feels too brutal.

There has to be some other way. But what? Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad [ sad] Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad Sad

BB01 · 19/06/2014 12:06

Have you tried similar but staying in room, Mirrhi?

Mirrhi · 19/06/2014 13:53

Yes, I stayed in the room today, tried shushing, talking to him etc but made no difference :-(

K1spoony · 19/06/2014 16:35

Dd normally just car naps during the day, which usually drives me mad! But yesterday she had 2 hours in the afternoon, maybe that's why she kept waking? Who knows?!? It never seems to be the same from one day to the next!!

CuteLittleToes · 19/06/2014 18:58

feekkery I'd try living room too. It might take a few days to notice any difference though.

keep looks like you're doing great, I bet your DD starts sleeping through consistently very soon - fingers and toes crossed for you!

mirrhi that's tough... Don't know what to say, hang in there!

cakeis my DS slept better with me too, but he started going longer stretches once I stopped cosleeping and night feeding...

So DS fell asleep all by himself last night. I was out, and my DM put him to bed, but he was wide awake playing with his teddies, waving arms around, etc. so she just left him to it. When she came back he was asleep!

He didn't sleep much better though, asleep by 9.30, and woke up almost 2am, so not too bad... Then however he woke up at 4, 4.30, 5, 5.45 and awake till 6.30 Sad I then had to rock him until he fell asleep and he slept for an hour...

No 2h naps but he napped for 1h15mins 2 days in a row, which is good.

BB01 · 19/06/2014 19:04

How long did you give it while you stayed in the room with him, Mirrhi? I only ask as it took ages for us the first time (and still does if I do it instead of DH) but then started getting much quicker. Sounds so hard for you.

Mirrhi · 19/06/2014 21:31

I was in the room with him for almost an hour, but it was too tough hearing him cry in the end so I gave in and rocked and cuddled him, then put him down and shush patted him til he fell asleep.

I really don't think I can carry on with it. He's only 6mo, it just feels like he can't possibly understand why this is happening,. It must just feel like I'm abandoning him and he's no idea why. He must feel distraught.

missmargot · 20/06/2014 07:10

mirrhi that's so tough! I don't blame you for feeling like giving up. Have you read the Baby Whisperer? Her approach is a bit softer I think.

I'm at the end of my tether this morning. DS can sleep through. He did it for over a month. He has done so twice this week. Yet last night I was awake from 1-5am. His cough is getting better but his sleeping isn't. From 1-3:30 he was mumbling and grumbling, not quite crying and possibly doing it in his sleep but keeping me wide awake. Then he cried, I fed him and he was apparently really hungry, then he had a baby disco in his cot for another hour.

We are two weeks off six months but I think he needs to move into his own room now. I will miss him and I'm sure I will be cursing the decision when I'm up and down the corridor to see to him but hopefully I will only wake if he cries rather than at every little sound.

keepitgoing · 20/06/2014 09:02

mirrhi the cuddling then shush pat sounds like a good approach. why don't you start there and then just try and reduce the cuddles, then the shushing etc. don't do anything you're not comfortable with.

Margot poor you. it sounds like maybe he's not well. have you tried a precautionary calpol dose? I take it you don't think he's napped too much/not enough? I agree with you about waking at every sound. I now wear ear plugs and dh nudges me when the monitor tells him she's actually awake as she does moan etc in her sleep

we had crappy naps yesterday. 3x30 mins. but 11.25 hours straight at night! Shock happy as does this mean I shouldn't worry about naps??

missmargot · 20/06/2014 09:30

keep that's great! I wouldn't stress about naps if things are going well at night and there aren't over tired tears during the day.

I did give DS some Calpol but it didn't have much effect. Naps have been going really well which made me think nights would too. I like the ear plugs idea, I think I need some!

BB01 · 20/06/2014 13:16

I agree Mirrhi that doing it the gradual way may work for you. We went from cuddles to patting to sitting next to the cot.

Mirrhi · 20/06/2014 19:52

Yes, I think

Mirrhi · 20/06/2014 19:54

Gah! I think I'll have to do a more gradual approach. Since doing yhe crying version he now starts howling every time I put him down for a nap :-( I feel like I've traumatised him. Horrible mummy Sad

missmargot · 20/06/2014 20:16

You are not a horrible mummy, don't be so hard on yourself. Have you tried the Baby Whisperer, shush, pat and put down the moment they are calm? She focuses on meeting their need but not over fulfilling it IYSWIM.

BB01 · 20/06/2014 21:33

I felt just the same last week Mirrhi, that I'd traumatised her. I actually posted something on Mumsnet to that effect. But I have read up so much on all this and have found no evidence that the sort of thing we're doing will damage them, whereas we know that ongoing lack of sleep and time to yourself can be absolutely damaging to us. So be kind to yourself x

keepitgoing · 21/06/2014 09:20

mirrhi Sad you won't have traumatized him. could you do pushchair naps for a couple of days then try the gradual approach then maybe he'd be better.

Mirrhi · 21/06/2014 12:28

Thank you for the replies and support Thanks
Naps were rubbish yesterday too, only managed an hour and a half all day - usually aim for 2 1/2 - 3. His morning nap lasted 5 mins this morning out in pushchair. DP took him swimming, he fell asleep on the way back and has just woken up after 30 mins so I'm feeding him in the hope I can get him back to sleep afterwards.
I've got hold of a copy of the baby whisperer so started reading it this morning whilst DP took boys out. I've also spoken to DP about night feeds and trying to extend the times between them. I think DP needs to be key in this as if I try to resettle DS he gets more wound up as he knows the milk is there but I won't give it too him
We're going to try tonight with DP going to him instead. Could be a long night....

keepitgoing · 21/06/2014 13:49

mirrhi do you think his naps affect his nights?

keepitgoing · 22/06/2014 15:23

mirrhi how are things going?

Margot when do you think you'll move him to his own room?

bb hope things are good with you too.

I think I will leave this thread for now as our sleep is so much better. good luck to those riding it out, and those trying some sort of training.

missmargot · 22/06/2014 16:23

keep that's great news, I'm really pleased for you. Our sleep has been a lot better too, although we've had a couple of terrible nights this week I'm fairly sure it's down to his cough and he has slept through 3 of the past 7 nights.

We moved his cot this morning and he's had two good naps in there but tonight could be a different story. Although I am really ready for him to move I also know I'm going to miss him.

ellie3009 · 22/06/2014 16:51

Hi all!

Please may I join you? DS is almost 6 months old, and slept well until 4 months when the dreaded sleep regression arrived.
He sleeps in his room, in his cot, and is exclusively BF. Not started solids yet.

Since about 3.5 months his bedtime has been around 7.30pm. He used to sleep until somewhere between 1-3am before waking, then go through until about 7ish, which was fab. At the moment he is waking between 10.30-11.30, so I barely get to bed myself before I have to get up with him again, then he is up again about 4.30-5ish, then normally up for the day at 8.15.

This doesn't sound bad written down, but I am not a good sleeper myself, and it takes at least an hour to get him back down, plus 45mins to fall back to sleep myself. When I put him down after the 5am wakeup I can't go back to sleep until after 7.15 once OH has left for work and stopped crashing about. This means that I have averaged less than 5 hours sleep a night for the last 8 weeks, and it is really starting to affect me. I am basically turning into a bitch, because I am tired and grumpy and I have no patience with OH.

I strongly suspect that DS is not waking because he is hungry and therefore would be able to sleep through. He barely takes anything when I feed him at night. Sometimes at the 5am wakeup it is possible to resettle with no boob.

I really want to move away from feeding at night to try and get him sleeping better and self-settling, but not if he is genuinely hungry. But how on earth do I find out if he is actually hungry or not??? Anyone got any clever ideas to help me?

Any advice or sympathy gratefully received!