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Original poster

SLEEP REGRESSION part 2...Roll up, roll up folks! Swap tales of woe, ideas, enjoy solidarity and get support here

999 replies

cakebaby · 27/02/2014 20:05

Thought I'd start a new thread as I couldn't see another one yet (will get HQ to delete if already up and running).

Tis good to talk.....

OP posts:
Cakeismymaster · 01/04/2014 22:25

Hi to all the new joiners
My dd is 28 weeks, been in sleep 'regression' since 13 weeks...I second soup in that you should think seriously about giving up bf as it is unlikely it will be the answer. Re a dummy - dd has always been a refuser but recently has started to take a dummy for naps, sometimes. However she absolutely will not have it at night, still refuses it. Similar for bottles - will now have a couple of ounces from a bottle in the day, but at bedtime - no way.
It is getting slightly better, or it could be that I am now used to it! But teething has just started with a vengeance.

Weescottie · 02/04/2014 09:18

Thanks cake and soup. It's good to know it can get better but I hope DS doesn't take 4 months!
Another night of him refusing his basket here and he was awake from about 4 wriggling and squirming due to gas. Those of you who cosleep, what do you do about burping baby. DS gets very windy anyway so normally I'd burp him after each side, if not more often but when co sleeping he just grazes and sometimes I don't fully wake up. I do make sure I burp him when I do wake but this doesn't seem to be working too well.

keepitgoing · 02/04/2014 09:26

I don't tend to need to burp her at night as she is sleepy and drinks more slowly I think.

OK so last night dh was on baby duty till midnight as I was shattered. She was down at 7 after a good feed. Woke 10.15. He tried to settle her but no luck. He gave her 70mls of ebm from a bottle (!!!) and though she kept dozing off every time he put her down or moved away from the cot she woke. Eventually slept on him 11.30-12 when he got me. I fed her and she went to sleep in the cot immediately for 3 hours (this is a good run for us right now...). So wtf is actually going on here.???

Mirrhi · 02/04/2014 11:39

Aaargh, need a moan and a rant if that's okay ladies? Since the clock change bedtime has become more tricky, DS always has a sleep between 3 and 4pm as this is when I collect DSSs from school and the walk in the pram sends him off. This would keep him going til about 6pm when we would start bedtime routine, with him going down about 6.30. Now he's tired and grumpy by 6 but will only nap if I put him down then and is then awake til around 8pm. Normally DP isn't home from work til after DS is in bed but has now been home a couple of times and feels I'm spending too long soothing him and should just put him down awake and let him cry if necessary - his theory is it's pain now for future gain and points out that he's done it twice before and knows it works. We had a long discussion about it and how I feel very uncomfortable with that, preferring to follow more NCSS style. I feel that bedtimes have been getting easier as DS is getting the idea of what's happening, it's just the clock change that's thrown him.
Anyway, in the spirit of trying this I've just been trying to put him down for his nap with less soothing. Result is he's got himself in such a state that he will not settle at all unless being held, he's had tears pouring down his face, I'm really stressed and it feels like a complete disaster. Even once I gave in and picked him up and settled him he won't go in his moses basket - normally when I put him down he has a huff to himself about it then settles down, now he's screaming every time I move near it no matter how asleep he appears to be Sad DP argues that it's for my sake he's suggesting this as he thinks I'm making a rod for my own back as things are. I can see his point and do worry that he could be right, but his style just feels so wrong to me.
Sorry for the rant, just felt like I needed to get it off my chest a bit. On a positive note, last night DS was wide awake after a nappy change at 1.30am, I put him down in his basket and he stayed put, entertaining himself for half an hour before dozing off to sleep all by himself!

Cakeismymaster · 02/04/2014 12:52

mirrhi how old is your ds? Guessing as he's still in the Moses basket he's not past 6 mths? I don't think your dp is right in saying leave him to cry, it won't help he is too little for it to do anything apart from upset him.
Don't get me started on 'd' p's though they just haven't got a clue! Giving out advice like they are the sodding baby whisperer but yet don't look after the baby for more than 10 minutes in an entire 24 hr period Hmm

Mirrhi · 02/04/2014 13:08

Cake he's 3mo, so still only very little. I know DP is genuinely trying to be helpful and supportive, and wishes he was home more to do more, but it does drive me mad when he points out 'well I have done this twice already...' So what?!
You sound like your frustratec by DP too? How's your LO doing today?

keepitgoing · 02/04/2014 13:32

if what 'he's done twice' is go out to work for most of the day.....

keepitgoing · 02/04/2014 13:33

fwiw I usually put did down awake but drowsy since about 3.5m. she still wakes a billion times a night so I don't know what good it does

Mirrhi · 02/04/2014 14:05

if what he's done twice is go out to work for most of the day
Thanks keepitgoing that made me Smile

Yes, I try to put DS down drowsy. Doesnt always work, either he falls asleep whilst still feeding or I do it a bit too early and he's too awake so won't settle, but mostly I manage it. He's more resistive to naps so I tend to have to get him more sleepy for them.

Reading your earlier post, do you usually put DD to bed etc? If she's used to you that may have been part of the problem, then she'd worn herself out so much with your DP she was shattered when you got her?

2blessed · 02/04/2014 14:12

I'd like to join if that's ok?
I have a 15 month old who rarely settles in his cot. Last week he climbed out of the cot. DP went down the leave him to cry route and thats what happened. So we now need to convert the cot into the cot bed. Any advice on tips and tricks we can try greatly asppreciated.
And holding hands with all of the other parents going through lack of sleep...

Cakeismymaster · 02/04/2014 14:35

2blessed probably not what you want to hear but we had to do the gradual retreat thing with ds when we converted to cot bed. Basically sitting with him when he went to sleep then creeping out once he was 'under' ! As time went by the sitting with him became less. I remember when he was about 2 saying 'mummy's just doing some jobs upstairs while you go to sleep' and then I kept popping back in to say 'still here' as he went to sleep. But he was a bit older than your ds I think.
Now he's 9 and has to be dragged out of bed for school!

keepitgoing · 02/04/2014 15:09

mirr I had got her down at 7. yes I think the problem is she needs me, or rather my boobs, to settle. Sad

hi 2blessed sorry you're having problems. no clue or experience of that age yet though sorry

2blessed · 02/04/2014 15:22

Thanks cake and keepitgoing.
I hadnt hoped to convert the cot for a good few months but I just cant take the chance safety wise.
In terms of sleeping, once hes finished his last bottle he tends to climb up on either one of us and have a cuddle to drop off. Occasionally he falls asleep on the bottle. Im finding transferring him very difficult at the moment as Im 7 months pregnant. If he wakes up he usually finds it difficult to settle back in his cot but drops off straight away once in our bed. This is causing a rift between DP and I.

soupmaker · 02/04/2014 19:30

Hello 2blessed. Have you tried giving the bottle in bed? I know it sounds bonkers but worked with our DD1. She'd get a wee story and a cuddle and then stroked/shushed to sleep. She's now 6, so I may be looking back with rose tinted specs on!

Chocoholism · 05/04/2014 03:45

Haven't read the whole thread yet but will try to to do so, my 4 month old has started to regress for the last week, goes to bed fairly easy although I do feed/rock to sleep, is this really bad?
She was waking up only once at 4-5 am but now it's earlier at 3am and she then wakes again early for the day! The only thing that will settle her is a bottle, am I wrong to go this? I didn't think she's be hungry as she only 2 weeks ago slept through without it!
Oh yes and hopefully you don't mind me joining the thread!

Mirrhi · 05/04/2014 11:45

Hi choc, and welcome. I think a lot of us are using feeding and rocking to get LOs to sleep, no one is going to judge you for it!
Rough few days here, DS keeps waking every hour or so in the night and is getting trickier to put down. It's so frustrating as his bedtime at least was going well but this week it's gone haywire for several reasons. It took almost an hour and a half to get him down last night, then he woke half an hour later. We've had things on in the day too which means his naps have been all over the place. I think I'm going to turn into one of those mums who refuses to go anywhere or do anything if it might interfere at all with naptimes!

keepitgoing · 05/04/2014 12:23

we had dh settling at 8.45 last night. took nearly 2 hours then she slept for 3 so didn't need food till 1.30. going to try again tonight. our issue is definitely feed to sleep having become inability to sleep without boob.

Mirrhi · 05/04/2014 12:31

How old is your LO keep? I'm sure you have said, but cant remember.
It's so tricky with feeding isn't it? I want to feed DS before bed obviously so that he will sleep as long as poss, but then he goes drowsy/falls asleep on the boob so what do I do? Do I wake him so that he can then go to bed without feeding? But then he's awake again for ages!

keepitgoing · 05/04/2014 12:46

5 months. she goes down drowsy or awake at 7 but am wondering if I need to feed earlier to completely remove the link. Sad as I love it. anyway we are going to give this 3 days and reevaluate.

keepitgoing · 05/04/2014 12:49

I do rowse her a bit if she's too asleep mirr by a cough, song etc. the books are clearly talking bollocks though as yesterday she was v awake. took 30 mins to get herself to sleep. no diff to night wakings. I feel hopeless helpless. half the world says wait it out other half it'll get worse. my gut feeling is it's a habit and just getting more engrained

Cakeismymaster · 07/04/2014 10:35

NEWSFLASH
dd slept an 11.30 to 5.00am stretch! I did NOTHING different to what I've been doing every other night for the last 4 mths...she is 29 weeks now.
And that was feed to sleep too, I've never been able to stop that. Will report back after tonight to confirm its a fluke Wink

Original poster
cakebaby · 07/04/2014 11:39

Congrats cake fabulous news!

In other news....things coming to a head here. DS back to waking 30 mins after going to sleep until I go to bed to co sleep. He then sleeps ok feeding twice but I hardly wake anymore, he just gets on with it. Last night it was bed at 7 sleep 730, he woke at 8, 9, 10 gave up & went to bed. Been like this nearly 2 weeks. He's 7 months now. Night feeds I don't mind, going to bed with him at 7 I object to . Last night I tried to settle him at 10 without feeding as he had a full feed at 9. Total. Nightmare. Screaming, crying, howling, the works. For 90 mins til I gave up so all his upset was in vain.

What the hell do I do now? Any advice appreciated.

OP posts:
keepitgoing · 07/04/2014 13:15

cake that's amazing!!! I really hope it continues. interesting you've done nothing different...

othercake that's bad. has your oh tried to settle him? must be hard for him smelling your milk but not getting it...

we have done that the last few nights on first wake up. night 1 - lots of crying, 1.75 hours. night 2 - less crying, 1.25 hours. night 3 - less crying 0.5 hours. she then sleeps 3 hours. last nights first wake up was 11 rather than 8.45 too. unfortunately dh is now working nights...

Cakeismymaster · 07/04/2014 14:40

cake I should have said in my post that dd is still crap in the evening - not as bad as your ds at the mo, but have been there a couple of weeks ago. She now does bed around 7.30, a wake up around 9.30 and then again 11ish. That's an improvement on previous when she was similar to your ds - what seems to have improved that part is since she has started on solids. But it's still almost like she cluster feeds still until she conks out around 11.
How's your ds doing on solids? I usually give her tea around 5.30.

Cakeismymaster · 07/04/2014 14:42

And to add - she always has mush food at evening meal, so I know she is getting something. All the finger food pointless BLW blah blah is at lunchtime Smile