The dreaded SLEEP REGRESSION support and solidarity thread!

[Tiredemma]

Here we are. Sleep deprived, emotional and craving all things sugary just to survive the day.

bah.

Thank you so much Boo . The spray has made a big difference Ds is napping now. Poor baby is exhausted. Dh and I had to take it in turns sitting up with him last night, but he was pretty inconsolable. I hope he can get some rest now little lamb. Any idea how long colds last in babies?

boo have you tried raising the head of the cot / bed a bit? Not enough so that DC will slip down. Really helps DS. He is on the OED - A-N one side and M-Z the other!

Well we had an 'interesting' night.
DS actually settled quite well at the beginning. Asleep by 8.15 and didn't do his usual wake up 30 minutes later.
He woke at 10.50, DP gave him a bottle and he fell asleep before he finished it so was back in his cot by 11.30. He then woke at 1.30. I could hear he was just chuntering away to himself so let him for a while to see if he went back off. He escalated to crying by 2 so I went in. To cut a long story short his stomach was obviously bothering him as he soiled THREE nappies in quick succession. We've been weaning him for 2 weeks now and he's pooing so frequently it's like having a newborn again!
In the end I crawled into the single bed in his room with him at about 3.30 and managed to sleep on and off til he woke properly at about 8.20.
As exhausted as I am I think it was better having him in his own room. At least I didn't have to tiptoe round my bedroom and worry about the bed creaking when I got in.

Noisy that actually sounds pretty reasonable for a first night in his own bed. I think we're going to have to try it with DD. She had been asleep since 7.30 but woke up as we came to bed 90 minutes ago and won't go back down. We've both tried, rocking feeding etc, but no matter what we do, the second she hits the mattress (or even before) she's crying again. It's ludicrous. Tried putting her in bed next to me but she cried there too, I have absolutely no idea what she needs any more (apart from a nipple actually in her mouth all night but I won't sleep at all if I try to do that). No matter how quietly we tiptoe about she always wakes up within 5 minutes of us coming to bed so I think we should try her in a separate room to see if she's any different when she isn't getting disturbed.

Posted too soon. Please let us know how you get on tonight! Ginny hope your LO is OK, colds are the pits.

I would rate last night as officially Not Bad.
Put DS down just before 8, he needed resettling twice between then and just after 9. Then he slept til 2.30! And there was no poo! I fed & changed him as he was pretty wet and got him back down just before 3.30. He woke again about 15 minutes later so DP went to settle him. He then slept from about 4 til 7.15. I got into the spare bed with him and he fed and dozed with me for another hour and a half. So that's only one proper wake up during the night.

We're by no means out of the woods (I had 2 good nights last week then rubbish ones afterwards) but Artemis I'd say it's worth a try putting your LO in her own room.

noisy that's great! fingers crossed it continues. My Lo is looking a bit brighter today, and is managing to nap (with gentle persuasion!). He had a mixed night, he's finding it hard to settle being so stuffy. Hopefully he'll keep improving today, he's certainly taking his bottles better. I had an awesome sleep as my amazing Dh sat up with Ds all night and sent me downstairs on the sofa bed to catch up. I dropped off at 9 and slept til 7, so feel like a new woman! I'm supposed to be taking Ds for his third set of injections tomorrow, the 2nd lot really upset him. Poor mite, he's having a miserable time .

Thanks, we can but hope.
Wow, 10 hours sleep sounds amazing! Bless your DH.
Glad to hear your DS is on the mend. Mine was badly affected by his second injections, more so then the first, but totally fine after the third lot so hopefully you'll have the same experience.

Thanks Noisy, I am extremely lucky with Dh he steps up so much even though he's working loads at the mo. Let us know how you go tonight, I really hope the good sleep continues (and the no poo!).

Most horrendous night ever last night.

DD woke up every 40 mins from 930pm.
I was almost psychotic with tiredness at 6am.

Teething hell. Dreading tonight

Oh now tiredemma it's awful isnt it, we've been away for a long weekend & ds2 has barely slept I've had a rotten time as so tired, glad to be home but like you dreading another night of watching the clock & seeing all the hours go by! I'm going to buy all the weaning paraphernalia tomo as I'm now pinning my hopes on weaning!!! Good luck for tonight

Noisy it's sounding positive. I just need to get DP fully on board with a date for the move. He is reluctant to have her apart from us as he thinks it'll make night wakings harder to deal with. He might be right but I want to try, think it could go either way and the longer we wait it move her the harder it will be.

Ginny your OH is a star! I had a lie in this morning but it was marred by weird nightmares, my body must be desperate to catch up on dream sleep. We also found the 2nd set of jabs the worst, hope LO is OK.

Tired hope you got some respite today. I'm dreading teething. We've had a few days of discomfort but I can't see teeth actually on their way yet. It must be awful being a baby! No wonder we don't remember it.

Boo sorry your weekend away was marred by exhaustion. I don't want to sound negative but weaning has made absolutely no difference so far for us, but maybe it will when food is a bigger part of her diet. But given that our main problem is feed to sleep and inability to self settle that's not surprising, hopefully it will help your LO. It's fun anyway!

DP has just settled DD for the third time in 20 minutes, hope this one lasts...

Artemis I hope your dd settled and you got some sleep. Tired and Boo sending unmumsnetty hugs, it is beyond awful being so tired, I hope last night was at least a bit easier for both of you. Noisy hope last night was another good one.

Ds was so tired last night, he only woke up a couple of times with his cough. Off for his jabs now, hope they will
Just do them then they're out of the way. Sorry for rubbish typing my phone is being a pain!

Also sending unmumsnetty hugs to those in need.

Last night was good in parts. We got DS properly settled some time between 8.30 and 9 and he slept til 1.50. No poo again (he's making up for it during the day today!). I fed him and got him back down by 2.30.

He then woke just before 4 and I tried to resettle him. He accepted his dummy so I knew it wasn't hunger. After about 25 minutes of shushing and rocking I gave up and got into the spare bed with him to try and bf him to sleep (usually works even when he's not hungry). He fidgeted for ages but eventually dropped off and we were up for the day at 8.

What I think last night showed me was that DS's 'problem' is the same as your LO's Artemis, he can't self-settle. He needs rocking to at least a point where he's almost asleep, unless he's in a moving car or pushchair. He's been teething lately so I know it's not a good time to start sleep training, but his first tooth is just starting to show now and it's definitely on my agenda in the next few weeks.

Oh and weaning doesn't seem to have made much difference for us either, other than to produce 6-7 dirty nappies per day!!

Oh dear noisy & Artemis my hopes for a better night tonight post some puréed pear & baby rice seems unlikely then!!! Our night was a weird mixture settled easily at 7 woke just before 9 to which I thought he couldn't possibly be hungry so over half an hour of trying to settle him & getting really fed up DP gave him a bottle which he wolfed down so obviously hunger was an issue!! He slept 10.30-12.40 I was getting really p*ed off at this point - breast fed him he was asleep again 1.15-4 another feed then back to sleep then up for the day at 7 - what is all that about it's like when he was new born!!

Fingers crossed to everyone for a better night!

Oh Boo I was hoping the weaning might have helped! Ds will be weaned early because of his reflux and I dreamed it would be a magic cure! I'm sorry it didn't work out. Maybe tonight will work out better? I've no idea why but we can hope!

We might have a job today as Ds has fought naps all day! He has had his tea time nap really late too - hope that won't set him all out of kilter. Good luck tonight ladies. I'm so glad I found this thread, good to know I'm not the only zombie mum out there.

We have to stay hopeful don't we or might lose the plot!! Ds appears to have taken easily to his puréed fruit & rice!! Hoping it's the start of me at least knowing when he wakes it definitely isn't through hunger & may give me the impetus/ strength to do a modified version of cc or CIO if that makes sense!

My ds was poorly after his first jabs no reaction to the second or third lot!

Noisy do you have an idea what kind of sleep training you'll try? I think we will end up in the same situation, I can't see that moving rooms will make any difference to DD's self-settling ability so we'll need to decide whether to sleep train her or just suck it up and wait for things to improve as she matures. Boo do you have a preferred method?

I really wanted to avoid doing anything that meant letting her cry but I've read everything I can find and I don't believe there is such a thing as a no cry solution. We tried NCSS and it was an abject failure, perhaps because the book said nothing about what to do if your LO doesn't respond to the methods. There was a cop out line that basically said if it wasn't working and your baby was getting upset you should get them to sleep the way you normally do, so the hours leading up to that point felt like a waste of time. Every sleep consultant I've looked into, even the ones who claim to be 'gentle' seem to offer a variation on controlled crying or shh patting and gradual retreat. We tried gradual retreat and PU/PD, not in any systematic way but enough to know that DD has an impressive capacity for screaming and can get very upset very quickly. We live in a terraced house, I think the neighbours would kill us before we'd made much impact on DD's sleep!

I'm just thinking aloud really but would be interested in other perspectives. DP is dealing with the first wake-up of the night in the hope of avoiding BF to sleep. She has had plenty to eat today, both milk and solids, and wakes at the same times every night so I think it's habit rather than hunger, she just can't drop off again once she wakes up.

Up every hour from 10.30 - 2.30, then up for the day at 5.40am . Didn't she hear me use the words 'controlled crying' yesterday?

Oh Artemis I am in the same boat as you, ds can only get himself back to sleep if I feed him either fb or af it's obviously the suckling he needs but he refuses a dummy how annoying is that!!!

I think you will have to go for it as you're right once you know they're not hungry, not unwell & they simply can't get to sleep without help you need to "train" them, I think you will have to tell yourself you're being cruel to be kind as she needs decent quality sleep as much as you do & is too young to respond to the withdrawal method where you go further & further out of the room!! Do you know your neighbours? Could you decide with dp when you're going to go for the cc & knock round to let them know/warn them? I've only just started weaning but in another week or so when were quite established with it I'm afraid I will be left with nothing other than cc & I will have to do it!!! DP has little input in these discussions as he usually says "whatever you think darling" so helpful but at least supportive!!

We were up 10, 12, 1.30, 4, 5.30 & 6.45 all requiring barely 5 mins on the boob just to get back to sleep! I feel your pain & exhaustion, I know have my bouncing ds1 to deal with as well - happy days!!

Boo I feel for you having an older child as well, I don't think I could cope! DP had a surprise day off today and let me go back to bed for an hour this morning, helped me get through the day. DD has been lovely today, all smiley and chatty, don't know how she does it when she's getting nowhere near enough sleep but am very grateful!

Good idea about speaking to the neighbours. They often go away at Easter so that would be good timing if they are, gives us chance to move DD into her own room first and see if that helps. Her room is next to their 7-year-old's so I doubt they'd appreciate hours of crying! All my naive principles are gradually going out of the window. I was never going to leave her to cry or give her a dummy. The only reason she doesn't have a dummy is she won't bloody take one!

Sleepy vibes to everyone for tonight...

Artemis thanks for the sleepy vibes
I think we will end up trying CC in some form, starting with the first settle of the night. That's one of my principles out of the window too but DS is just getting too heavy and wriggly for me to rock him to sleep.

Last night was different again. He was settled by 8 and amazingly there was no wake up 30 minutes later. He woke at about 11 and DP gave him a bottle so I could go back to sleep (I'd gone up at 9.30!). He then woke again just before 3am, hungry and with a pooey nappy. After I'd changed and fed him I waited til I thought he was properly asleep to put him down, but he woke up and started grizzling. THIS is when I need him to self-settle! So we ended up in the spare bed again from about 4, dozing and feeding on and off til 8am. Although 'on paper' it looks like quite a good night, my sleep was so broken I still feel shattered.

On a side note I'm starting to worry I've broken my baby by weaning him - we're still getting about 7 dirty nappies a day! It's been over 2 weeks now, surely his system should have adjusted? I'm not sure whether teething is also influencing things - we now have the top of two teeth showing, bless him. Maybe I should speak to my HV.

I think lots of us are being driven towards doing things we never saw ourselves doing when we read the parenting books but we didn't necessarily bank on having non sleeping babies!!!!

Hmmm noisy not sure about the pooing I thought the opposite, I thought as they weren't used to processing heavier "foods" or passing proper stools they got a bit bunged up to start with? What are you giving him?? Makes sense if you're mainly giving him fruit & veg purées??

Ds has gone down ok tonight he falls asleep as I feed him which isn't good according to the books could be cause of my problem as he doesn't go down awake but he is so tired by bedtime he falls asleep as he feeds! Dreading another bad night ladies on day two of weaning already have that sinking feeling it's going to have no impact on his sleeping, I'm currently giving him a small breakfast & a small tea how quickly do you go up to 3 "meals" a day??

Oh dear if anything I think weaning (albeit only in the early days mind) might be making our situation worse not better, for several weeks now I've been guaranteed of a fairly decent evening ds down easily at 7ish til 10.30 ish he is already awake tonight can weaning make them even more hungry? Maybe I shouldn't have started as not 6 months yet he is trumping some pretty vile smelling scents out!!!

Because we started a little before 6 months I've been taking it slowly so yes, apart from porridge and the odd mashed banana he does have mainly purées.

Having done some Googling, I do think the teething could be to blame for the poo issue. Time will tell once his two teeth are properly through I suppose. He's fine in himself, eating OK, no sign of fever etc.

As for number of meals, I'm not sure if what we give DS at the moment could be called a meal, but he has solids twice a day. We'll move to three times next week, which will be our 4th week of weaning (I know people who've done it much quicker). I gather a baby should be on three meals a day by about 8 months. I need to do a bit more reading up to see what counts as a meal though - more than one course perhaps?

Good luck tonight everyone, I'm off to bed!