Misery loves company: riding the mo fo out into Part II

[ElphabaTheGreen]

In our last exciting instalments:

Needles was at breaking point with a screaming 10 mo DD

Hear had experienced the magic of ONE unbroken night!

Dreaming was continuing to confound all with her ability to manage three children on four or five minutes a night, thanks to DT the Terrible.

Stitch was still having her sleep eaten by...erm...Stitch.

Poppy was pondering how the actual fark she was going to manage a newborn on top of BabyAmex's night time shenanigans.

And the desperate Elphaba had turned night duties entirely over to DH with mastitic results.

Join us with your stories of misery and woe in this, the most sleep-deprived corner of MN!

Oh Dreaming, that sounds very rough. Are you thinking about night weaning for your sanity?

Hope you had a better night Elphaba

Waves to everyone else :)

Well a better night here, one wake at 2.30am then up at 5.20am. If she manages a decent day time nap it all seems to work out. I am hoping this is the beginning of better sleep, good timing considering . Found out this morning, but haven't got a clue how far along as periods a bit unpredictable

I have mastitis for the fourth time. The (male) OOH GP told me just now that the reason I keep getting it is because they don't recommend breastfeeding after 6 months.

I recited the actual NHS and WHO advice to breastfeed until 2 years. Apparently (according to him) that only applies to developing countries. Because the NHS gives advice to developing countries a lot.

Shit night - DS has the squits and filled not only his nappy but his cot twice last night. My boob hurts, I feel like shit, my husband is away for work until Tuesday and his parents, the only other support I have, are away on holiday. And I just had a cockwomble of a know-nothing GP on the phone, but at least he prescribed me antibiotics.

What an awesome start to the weekend.

Oh! Stitch the Third on the way! Congratulations!

Gosh stitch! How exciting! :o

ffs elph, and people wonder why we have such a low rate of bf in this country glad you got the drugs though.

Dd slept like a little snoozing angel last night. Woke for a cuddle at 9 but went back to sleep in her own bed and didn't wake again until 6am! Yay :o

Thanks, was a bit of a shock. A slight feeling of doom with a smattering of joy when I found out has now morphed into happiness with a new motivation to sort out stuff sharpish. Exercise regime back on, painting, spring cleaning, junk clearing and the small matter of my Masters due to start in October. It will be fine....

Oh bollocks elph, have you considered some immune boosting options to help your body fight off the infection? If you are tired and run down your body needs all the help it can get. You know, an extra 1000mg vitamin C daily, multivitamin, friendly bacteria like acidophilus, super antioxidant foods, time in the sun etc...

Yay for sleep Hear

Congratulations Stitch i'm jealous

elphaba the GP is talking shite,hope you've told him that.Such pity he won't experience mastitis on his bollocks.

Sorry I'm not writing on thread,sometimes I stare at the comp and have no clue what to write cause I'm braindead

DS gets through the phase of waaaahwaaaaahwaaaaaah everytime he sees me.He's allegedly fine with everybody else,sleeps for DH and MIL no bother.

I don't know how people cope,seems like everything's slipping out of my hands

Hooray stitch huge congratulations! 3 is fab . All the above mentioned stuff will be sorted by StitchInTime's arrival. Natch.

elph, huge sympathies with the mastitis. A friend recommends a disposable nappy soaked in really hot water wrapped around the boob. Not instead of your antibiotics of course, just an adjunct. If it helps, the dietician for both dts and paediatrician for Dt1 have both told me its (bf) not nutritionally needed now and i should be aiming to stop by 18 months, respectively.

Now, please explain to me, in words of one syllable, why DT the Angelic is now as of this week refusing to go to sleep? Still up kicking up shit now. He's also just learnt to stand up in his cot. He was so Angelic before you just lay him down and that was it, despite the fact he's been walking a while. So now he's standing up trying out cot tricks and tootling round it, monkeying about.

hedgehog I reckon most people don't cope as well as they pretend in public. People tell me I do well-ha!!! How wrong they are, if only they knew!!! Did you namechange? I've gone temporarily brain dead too as to whether you did and how old your dc is? Clingy, whingey dts here too who are waaay better for the nanny while I'm at work. Gah.

Oh and yes, night weaning purely for my sanity stitch

Sorry for the millions of installments every time I post, post from my phone...

Since when has breastfeeding been solely about nutrition?! Can you tell I've been mentally composing my letter of complaint all day?

You lot just put some hope into me that my brains is not gone completely thank you

I just can't make it work between organising the house-meals,cooking,washing,cleaning,tidying,garden(didn't water the greenhouse last 2 days-no time)and work.Back to work part time and it's a bliss.It saves my sanity-some adult conversations and rest comparing to constant running at home.

Dreaming sometime I'm wondering why people boast so much about their angelic DC who sleep whole night,have couple of 2 hrs naps a day,eat everything and never cry or make a mess.I know it's a load of shite,some people cope better than the others but why add to somebody's misery instead of giving a pat on the back and a bit reassurance?

How do you cope with 3?I remember dreaming about twins but I can't cope with 1 DS sometimes.People say it's the easiest change from 1 to 2 but maybe it's another load of shite?

I'd love to give DS a sibling otherwise he'll be the only one in my and DH's family-everybody well over forty here except me (approaching though) but i'm scared like hell and DH might hit the roof if i ask him.

Ds has such fucked sleeping pattern that he goes to sleep either at 11pm or starts the day at 5 am-no sleep for me during the day so I was on my legs for 27 hours at some point(working nightshift).I'm not looking for sympathy but I'm just scared as I have nearly an hour drive home afterwards.Sometimes I have to stop the car in the layby and go for a walk to not fall asleep driving.

Off to read some rubbish on MN,sorry for not writing so much but sometimes too knackered and as Elphaba says I'd be composing my post for 24 hrs.

Hugs to you all,kiddies and bumps :)

The whole argument that you should stop bf when you don't need it for nutrition is bollocks. You don't absolutly need bread, or fish, or dairy, or fruit really but we feed them to our DC as part of a balanced and varied diet. Bm is simply another food that I give to my dd as part of the wide variety if things she eats. It has lots of good things in it and no good reason not to give it to her so why on earth should I stop? Its certainly better for her then the biscuit she just had and probably better then the grapes she ate earlier but I don't here anyone telling me I should stop feeding her grapes because they are not nutritionally necessary! Humph! Can you tell this annoys me a bit :o

yes, I totally agree hear. I feed mine so much shite I'm glad of the ongoing bm actually

Which brings me, hedgehog, to coping. Hear are my Rules of Engagement:

1. Never, ever, leave the house without a drink and several snacks handy. One should preferably have no nutritional value. Pom bears go down a treat here. Or if more prepared, little tubs with cheerios, raisins, blueberries, chocolate buttons for the dairy-ok one, things that'll take 'em a while to pick up in the tubs. Use them at any necessary moment. Pretend you didn't realise tea is 10 minutes while opening said unhealthy snack.
2. Never, ever, expect to be able to maintain any kind of house pride while caring for 3 under 3. And that is with a cleaner 3 hours a week.
3. Tea must be made while at least one, preferably 2 are napping. If for any reason this doesn't occur (the required number of children napping or the tea making for any other reason) resign yourself to feeding them either fishfingers and waffles, chicken nuggets and oven chips or beans and waffles. Again.
4. Activities. One needed for morning, one for afternoon, minimum or there will be bored fighting. Make that more fighting (well, snatching and pushing over).
5. Online shopping or husband to shop. End of.
6. Everyone helps with the washing- pushing in/pulling out of machine, pushing the start button (groan) and hanging up (no, stop legging it with my pegs). Folding and organising is sadly an evening activity. Every morning, first load goes on first thing.
7. If tea has happened to make it into the slow cooker, put at least 2 baby sized portions in the freezer to avoid some nights of waffles

I have a kind of routine most days, but that's because I can't manage anything very spontaneous with mine. However, in terms of housework and meals, pretty much the same applied when I just had DD, except I did 1-1.5 hours housework or cooking while she napped and batch cooked and froze for when I didn't or occasionally just watched crap daytime TV, especially in the morning sickness months

Everyone helpfully told me 1-2 children was the hardest jump, but once you're splitting your time ineffectually between 2 children, 3 or more is no difference. People told me this gleefully, knowing I was pregnant with twins, and would say "so you're stuffed!" . Can I have a sticker please for not poking their eyes out with something sharp?! . When they play together, and DD tells me she loves her brothers, its magical. I say jump in . TBH I don't find one toddler and one baby hard. Baby in sling as and when, only need a double buggy, or single and sling, job's a good 'un. Get 1:1 while the other naps/ plays with a grandparent etc. I find the 2 babies at the same stage hard, really hard. A lot better now they're walking, for logistically getting them out of the car for example, but very hard to keep them all safe out and about. There are only a few places I can manage all 3 singlehandedly. I'm lucky to have some paid help currently so I can get out, though not sure how long we can keep shelling out... See, look how opposite of calm, capable and unflustered I am?! (and don't tell anyone anywhere else on mn what crap I feed my little ones, I'll get flamed- I once saw a post where someone was saying they'd never feed their dc petit filous for the high sugar content- I'm delighted if DD eats a petit filous, it's in our 'healthy' list!)

Oh- I meant to say, I expect the only reason I find two a walk in the park is because its so much easier than 3!!! Ha!

I love breastfeeding, breastmilk contains important immune factors that are present in higher amounts after the first year of life. How could it not be important for our roaming toddlers who eat dirt and chew bits off the floor? Stupid uneducated medical professionals grrr

Good tips Dreaming, I am taking notes. Although dd1 is starting school part time in September and is a very mature 4 years old, so my life with 3 will be a little easier.

I do 1-5 of yours. I manage to fold clothes during dd2's nap time as dd1 is easily occupied independently. I put them in big zip up laundry bags to stop dd2 un-doing my lovely folded piles of washing, then put away later.

Number 3 I do sometimes, but I have a playpen for dd2, plus the watchful eye of dd1 to help me if I need to cook whilst dd2 is awake. Mine eat whatever we are having and DH eats later to make it simpler. Lunch is cold or simple foods like cheese on toast, mini pitta pizzas or boiled/scrambled eggs and toast. I also find Peppa Pig an excellent babysitter! Mine don't fight so much as there is less competition, but dd2 will hit dd1 if she cuddles her.

Mine watch too much tv and eat sugary foods sometimes, but hey they eat more than their 5 a day in fruit and veg so I figure it all balances out somehow.

I spend nap time laying on the sofa drinking coffee and pissing about on mn. I'm not very domestic

Just submitted a 'letter of concern' to my GP practice about their latest daft advice. Since on two previous occasions (by two of their other GPs) I have been told respectively to wear really tight clothing to relieve the symptoms, and to avoid feeding off the affected side, this last piece of quackery was the large bale of straw which broke the camel's back so I've sent them a pointed letter, fully referenced with THEIR OWN FUCKING GUIDANCE about BFing and mastitis management. I also pointed out that in four visits with mastitis in five months, not one of the four doctors I saw even suggested a referral to the local NHS breastfeeding consultant to find out what the cause of the repeated infections might be. I didn't ask, because I'm clever enough to make enquiries myself on Mumsnet but how many wouldn't ask because they don't know any better?

Oh, and the 3:30am stand-off continues unabated This morning DS decided to shit repeatedly from 3:30am until 5:30am, probably because of the antibiotics I'm on, poor little mite Happy as Larry, though, and enjoying his morning showers with mummy, since she can't think of any other way of both getting clean and stopping him from putting his fingers in plug sockets while daddy's away.

Elphaba good on you for sending the letter how they can give such crap advice without a blink of an eye?So how the fuck heck are you supposed to clear the blockage if they tell you not to feed?Mind you,DS didn't want to feed from affected breast,Gp at the hospital said that's because milk changes the taste.I was told to express and then feed as normal.I did but the milk supply was worse afterwards.

What antibiotics are you taking?I can't remember which one I got but remember asking the doctor whether it was safe for DS.Yes it was.Have you tried ibuprofen(i's anti-inflammatory)?

I'd be asking as WHY you have another case of mastitis toeliminate the cause.Please contact local BF consultant,my one called me after I refused to switch to formula as DS wasn't putting any weight on and HV contacted them. stupid woman HV not Bf consultant

I got some socket covers on a car boot sale.This and a sharp NOOO towards DS is enough.Now he doesn't ebven look at the sockets.

Sorry to hear about the pooping sessions in the middle of the night,any chance you could strip DS and pop him to the shower 3 am onwards?Only joking . bean bag sounds lovely

Stitch i remember the beginning of BF.It wasn't easy,didn't have any milk for a few days so DS was hungry,sore,cracked,bleeding nipples,mastitis and so on.I didn't stop thanks to my MIL and BF consultant.Now I can see the results-DS has much better immune system as doesn't pick up every bug that goes around.I was just about to stop BF but decided to carry on-thanks for the info,didn't know that breastmilk is even better after a year.

Where did you get this zipped laundry bag?DS eyes light on when I put the basket with washing on the floor.If I nip to the loo he'll scatter everything on the floor.

Dreaming

Thanks a lot for the tips on how to survive-some of them are already in place except shopping-DH is HOPELESS at it ad has no clue.I get heavier items (tins,tatties) delivered and shop for the smaller ones as it's a kind of entertainment to me I'm a food shopaholic
I'm not worried about feeding DS crap sometimes,it won't make him any damage.It's not like he's having full fry up,fizzy and crisps everyday.Cheerios are fantastic for his small fingers and shreddies have lovely texture.I'm not going to give him very sugary stuff like coco pops or frosties.
Sod the housepride,I'm not washing up tonight.
Right ladies,off to bed to read more rubbish on MN Take care :)

I don't have socket covers at all. Got rid of them after I saw this. Stitch will leave them if I tell her no, but isn't generally interested anyway.

Bald I got mine from my local hardware store. They are those ugly plastic checked bags with handles, like this.

Well done for writing the letter Elph.

Bald I got straight on the BfN Helpline. Lovely support worker and I went through every conceivable scenario and decided I've just got an infuriating susceptibility to the bastard thing and may also be related to the fact that I sometimes sleep on my stomach which might block things up. I suppose I could ask for a referral to the local BFing consultant but I don't know what she could add. I don't think we could really change DS's latch this late in the game - if that's a problem at all - as he does what he likes by now, surely? According to the BfN lady I take all the recommended prevention and treatment measures so I don't really know what else seeing someone in person might add.

Off to work. Bah humbug.

Dd went to sleep at 6 as she was an exhausted, over heated mess. Of course that has resulted in her now being wide awake and charging around the place like a maniac

Ah the joys of a heat wave.

It has taken DH over an hour to get Stitch to sleep, and I just had to put dd1 back to bed as she woke her sister up 4 times trying to talk to her Dad.

At least I managed to get some Pilates done, and DH got to realise how long it can take to get Stitch to sleep

I've had screaming and the sound of DH 'shh'ing down the baby monitor for about 40 minutes now.

Who are these people that get guaranteed 12 hours a night forevermore after three nights of sleep training??

I am totally over the hot sunny weather. Summer is really not as much fun with a baby that doesn't manage heat very well. Up at 5:30am today and, after being awake half the night, dd is already a wreck.