High-Need Baby Support Thread III

[TitaniaP]

Well as I'm awake I thought I'd start thread 3!

The high-need baby thread has been moved from breast & bottle feeding to sleep. In the early days of the thread I think feeding was a significant issue for many of the posters. I think those that post regularly on the thread would now agree that's it's mainly sleep that's the issue.

So if your baby fits the following criteria come and join us for wine, chocolate, coffee and matchsticks as we delight in our active, inquisitive, curious and restless babies or toddlers!

1. Feeds frequently daytime
2. Feeds frequently nighttime
3. Needs to be constantly held
4. Wont sleep alone
5. Hates the car seat/pram
6. Short naps

Oh Button I'm sorry you're going through this :( Sending you hugs lady, I'm only 10 months in and cant imagine where I'm going to dredge up the strength to be the responsible adult in control when he gets older.

I am officially at the end of my tether. I don't know if this disqualifies me from posting here, but we are going to look into sleep training. We can't carry on like this. His sleep is worse and worse and DH and I are completely at our wits end. I'm scared that I won't have a marriage much longer if things carry on.

Plan is to get him into his own room, take him to the GP to rule out anything that could be causing him a problem, and then look at our options.

Can't believe it's come to this.

Hugs botton - not sure what else to day!

We're thinking about some form of sleep training too tickle - probably along with night weaning in a couple of months. I'm going to be working nights and weekends from August and DP is worried he won't be able to settle DS overnight unless he's night weaned.

DP and I have just been away for a night, leaving DS with my parents. It was great, we went to the cinema and for a meal and were in bed by 9! I still woke up a lot but it was nice to be able to go straight back to sleep again. When I rang my mum to see how it was going she said "don't worry, he's been really good, he slept brilliantly....until about 11pm!" - her and my dad had to take shifts after that!

Tickle- dont feel bad- and you are certainly not disqualified lol!! Do what you feel u need to do. We also got to rocky marriage point and something had to give. I've already told u all what we did, and apart from some blips, in general ds only wakes once or twice a night. He's never slept through, but we are much more rested, and life is easier all round! Good luck, let is know how u get on!

Spanner- you must be feeling human again

buttonmoon you will find the strength - i feel like tickle though i am only 8 months in and when i think of the problems we will encounter when they are teens etc i just do not think i have it in me!

dd is good as gold right now. she is sitting beside me on the sofa with a blanket round her eating a bit of an apple watching tv with me. its bliss. she is generally content now, as long as she's beside me but sleep is still the problem. i am too tired to think how to tackle it

things had got a bit better with dh but blew up last night. we are both under too much pressure. we had a big argument last night about who was doing the most, about appreciating each other, then he went out and didn't come back, he stayed at his friends, and was meant to be working till half 6 but still isnt' back and now says itl be 9. im not looking forward to the confrontation.

hope there are some better nights for us tonight

Thanks everyone! I'm feeling a bit better. I'm still terrified and I'm not in the slightest any less worried but I feel that if the worst is true and she does have an ed then I can deal with it and we can get her help.

It was a w/e of ups and downs - she ate really well, but then always does when with us, but I realised that she doesn't really see herself the way she is - ie she thinks she's larger than she is.

Jan I'm sorry things are not so good again. I think you feel a bit like me - one step forwards and two back.

Aww shucks. Thanks Puddle.

I know you probably have tried everything already but things which helped ds were...

...infacol, gripe water, sometimes sleeping on his belly, bath before bed, being swaddled, a dummy, baby massage (the biggie was making clockwise stroking movements on his belly under his tummy button - result = big farts ).

Obviously for my ds, moving to Dr Browns bottles really helped too but I think (correct me if I'm wrong) you're bf so that is a duff steer.

If I think of anything else I'll let you know. You forget amazingly quickly what helped because as soon as you're over the trouble you put it all out of your mind!

Oh, and Tickle I don't blame you for thinking about sleep training. DS just stays on the right side of reasonable so I keep putting it off. Don't forget that there are many many types of sleep training so don't feel bad.

At some point you have to get your sanity back. A life which is filled with strife and resentment is not good.

Ho hum. Try the dummy. I've been quite passionately opposed to them with dcs 1-3 but ds2 simply melted the first time he had one. Even now (at 10m) it still helps him to burp and always helps his frequent bouts of painful hiccups. We said that it'd be gone before Christmas but we now steadfastly refuse to discuss it . I suppose there'll be plenty of other Christmases...

Have a rare quiet pm so am now off to do a bit of knitting as otherwise I'll spend the whole evening on MN!

We put him down, he cries
We pick him up, he cries
We offer him his breakfast, lunch or dinner, he cries
We wipe his face, he cries
We lay him down to change him, he cries

It's all getting rather wearing. 10 months is slowly turning into my least favourite! Thought he'd be happier now he's crawling. I'm not really being fair, of course. He's got a nasty cheery cough that the doctor says he just has to ride out. But when my hubs, a man with the patience of all the saints combined, says he's getting tired of DS, it's worry time :(

Cheery cough? Chesty. Stupid phone...

Calpol!!! Might be teething??

Cheers mampig, he is very dribbly so we've tried Calpol - although only just before bed (not that it's making any difference to his sleep, because his cough, which is atrocious, is stopping him sleeping). Maybe we should give it a go during the day too...

IABU to moan about things as I know he's not feeling himself and is not getting enough sleep. It's just hard and draining when everything you try and do for him is met with crying and/or sad face.

I don't think you are!!! Sure we all moan away here!! And that's what we're here for after all!! Give the Calpol a go, and keep it regular for few days to see how he goes. Maybe something else working on him too? Next few days should tell a tale- grumpiness usually precedes illness of some sort ime, so time will tell! Meantime, rant away .......

10 months is hideous. I hated it. This too shall pass.

We hit a new low last night - DS refused to go to sleep at all and I ended up climbing into his cot with him!

I spent the afternoon making blackout curtains for his room so I'm hoping for the best. He's asleep now which is an improvement on last night already

I just missed out on a shade a babe on ebay by 49p. All cos my sodding internet wouldn't load! Am cross cos even with spf50 on ds caught the sun today. The problem is that walking to school he is in full sunlight either on the way or way home (depending on whether it's am or pm). Must be the pale skin to go with his red hair. He didn't even catch this much in Kenya

If it was any of you lot... outside now!

Wasn't me

Hey gang. How's everyone doing?

Am fed up with the sun already Joyful [pastey englishwoman emoticon]. DS has a horrible virus and his temperature keeps spiking. Night before last it was 39.7. The heat isn't helping me to keep him cool. He is off his food, very snuffly so can't sleep properly and is therefore exhausted. I think I have the adult version of his virus - no temp but am thick with snot and a pounding head. It's so hard being a mum when you're ill, I just want to collapse in bed for a week.

Quick Q, have been giving him loads of calpol and nurofen to control his temperature. GP said we could alternate these every 2 hours if needed. It's working but it seems like such a lot to give him. Does it sound alright to you? Just having a mini panic that I'm wrecking his kidneys. Tried to go without overnight but it shot up again and by 4am he was roasting hot and shivering.

On the plus side, he took his first steps on Friday! Just wish I could enjoy them more.

Well done BabyKong! :) Sorry you're both poorly lady, hope you both feel much better soon.

Joyful - the sun is lovely, the blue sky is lovely, but the heat is killing me! DS seems okay at the moment, is sleeping in a sleeveless vest and napp as its very hot in our room. We've got the paddling pool out this afternoon and a few friends bringing their bubs over,so that should be nice. Suncream, hats and parasol at the ready though.