A thread for my early waking friends who want a whinge

[fififrog]

A few weeks back there were quite a few of us with DCs about a year old, too young for gro clocks etc waking up TOO BLOOMING EARLY. Where are you all at now? DD seems to be getting earlier. Cough not helping but we had 4.55 this morning. I hate to say it but I actually enjoyed her being ill last week as she slept til 6.30 once. Some mornings I think "just a long phase we can live with it" but this morning I was in total despair. Will I ever be able to make it to 10pm without thinking I will regret staying up this late??! I know some of you will say stick with the messing around with morning nap, it will fix it, but to be honest I don't believe it will and I just want to WHINGE to people who will understand!!

Hi ladies

Please can I join?

My 15mo DD has been an early riser on and off since she went through the 9 month sleep regression (which begun at 7 months and tbh I don't think she's actually ever recovered from!).

Just as I start to think we are overcoming the early wakings something comes along to cock it all up. I thought the clocks changing would help - it did for a bit, then crawling and walking would help - it did temporarily. We settled into maybe a three week period of 6 am starts but then she decided to drop the morning nap and it's been pretty shit since then.

I don't think there are any magic answers anymore as I thought moving to one nap might actually be the magic answer. Instead I wonder if we've spiralled into some overtired hell that we'll never get out of.

I'm fed up with feeling like a zombie and looking like I've aged about 10 years in the last 15 months. And I feel like my DH and I are bickering and not getting on like we used to. I want to enjoy every minute of having DD (as for various long and sad reasons she will probably be an only)-I am feeling resentful that if I only got a bit more sleep life would be more peachy (or maybe I'm just deluding myself!). We try to go to bed early but being back at work is not always possible.

I feel a bit better for having ranted so thanks if anyone has listened. I do wonder if DD is about to have another developmental leap (trying to talk) but I seem to have been saying that for the last 8 months!

I'd like to join too please!

DS1 (age 3.5) has always been a terrible sleeper, never managing to nap for longer than 45 mins until he suddenly 'got naps' aged 3 (fortunately while I was pregnant) and always waking early. 5am was normal for him for a long while, though excruciating for us. Lately we seem to be stuck at 6am which I can cope with but now DS2 (10.5 months) seems to have caught the early waking bug.

We've had four 4.55am starts from DS2 in the last week and I'm mortified that it seems to be happening all over again. I've tried leaving him but he never goes back to sleep (he just sits up in his cot) and ends up waking DS1 which is a scary prospect as the last thing I want him is him waking up earlier than 6am again!!

Plus, DS2's naps have gone to pot too. Just had a two hour lunchtime 'nap' session that mainly consisted of him waking every 20 mins and me going in and settling him only for him to sleep for another 20 mins and the cycle to start all over again.

I've tried all sorts of routine shifts and I've never really found a solution, apart from putting him to bed early...which I know sounds like it shouldn't work but actually it does help. Last night ds2 was asleep by 6.30 and woke at 5.30 so had a full hour and a half more sleep than the night before.

The thought of another two years of this makes me shudder....but actually I feel marginally better for having got it off my chest!!

Hi waybuloony - not sure if there is anyone else out there but I'll keep you company... How was DS2 since you posted? Do you think it could be a 'wonder week' or developmental spurt causing this regression? I know DD's naps and sleep become even more shockingly shit when going through a wonder week.

We had 5.20 this morning and 5.30 yesterday - could be worse. Could be a lot better though. The thing that's really bothering me is that DD is obviously tired when she wakes. Previously when she was doing her early wakings she seemed ready to start the day but now she is grumpy and miserable all morning until she goes down for her lunchtime nap (she will NOT go down for a morning nap).

Think I'm going to try your suggestion of early bedtime. Though being at work today realistically I'm not going to be able to bath until 6.15pm tonight and I'm not sure that's early enough.....

We've been on holiday and the jetlag has meant that DD has been up much later. This was meaning 8am wakings but she has steadily moved earlier and earlier. She woke today at 5.55am after having gone to sleep at 10pm. I shudder to think what will happen when we get back home. I can't cope with losing sleep on both ends.

Hi new ladies, most of the gals who started this thread seem to have moved on, hopefully to better sleep! I too have assumed things like moving to one nap would help (but no). What a bummer to have two of the little blighters at it - you're putting me off having another!

Terry I really hope your LO gets a bit more sleep... Getting eaten into at both ends is a nightmare!

Keeping DD up til 7.30 nigh on impossible the last two nights and we've also had 5.30 and 5.40 since we got back. It is depressing, but at least it's post-5.30.

Hi all...I've been try

Sorry, posted above by mistake. My DS was in an OT cycle cyz I had tried pushing him to 1 nap before he was ready and making the mistake of keeping him awake too l

Aaaaaargh!!sorry-stupid phone! I was keeping him awake too long so he was OT and sleeping less and less. I went back to 2 naPs (well 1 and half as am nap was causing early waking for us so pushed it to 9.45-10 and capped at 30 mins) and then early bedtime for a couple of days. I dont want to jinx it but this week we are now on day 6 of 1 nap and DS has been consistently doing 11 hour nights or little more. Unfortunately my sleep is still shite. Keep waking between 12-3am and unable to get back to sleep. At least DS is sleeping though and that is the main thing

I think the key was not doing cold turkey-he couldn't take the sudden routine change so I had to shift him gradually. Still open to 1.5 nap days with early bedtime if he gets OT again though.

Tried kids antihistamine for couple of nights and managed about 5 hours of sleep or so which was nice while it lasted. Don't want to keep swigging it back though just in case.

Hi feeno that sounds promising. I think we made the move to one nap too quickly. We are trying for an earlier bedtime to see if we can get out of this OT state. Only trouble is DD now has horrific cold and will only fall asleep upright so I hope I'm not storing up trouble by allowing her to. If I don't though she takes ages to fall asleep and we fall further into the depths of OT.

You have my sympathies re insomnia. I had it bad back in January. You can see how our DCs also end up sleeping less and less when they're stupidly sleep deprived. Only thing that helped was persisting at going to bed earlier myself and then it's eventually I started sleeping better and could push my bedtime later (the irony is that as I've typed this I've just realised exactly where I've been going wrong with DD!!!!)

Oh thank god, we're not alone. Bless you all. :)

Misery loves company

Well, we are back to a 5am wake up today-jinxed it-grrrr!

p.s. daisylulu have u tried a karvol plug in? We found they helped DS to sleep better at nights when he was all bunged up at night. We'd give him a good steam before bed and leave the plug in on all night to release its vapours. May help u?

Thanks feeno we do have a plug in and I think it helps a bit. We had 5am too this morning so you have my sympathies

took DD to doctors this am and it turns out she has ear infection. Feel like a very bad mum now for nearly screaming 'FFS just go back to sleep' (we are getting it both ends at the mo as she also won't settle at bedtime without an hours battle). Anyway hoping that the antibiotics kick in and at least we have an easier to settle happier baby even if she does still wake early

Does anyone else find uncontrollable rage at hearing about good sleepers? my mums friend casually mentioned yesterday that her 16mo granddaughter is 'quite good' and sleeps from 7pm-8 am! I literally wanted to weep. I know babies are all different but I would chop my right arm off for a 6am start!!

Hi folks feeno fab news that you managed to break the cycle. So sorry you had another 5am but I think just be prepared for some blips. You know he can do it now so let that give you confidence. I am sure you will have seen the likes of omama and loveis saying it took 6 weeks to see improvements with a new regime.

FWIW I think we have finally broken the back of our problems, thanks to Chris Hoy ;-) My suspicion has long been that DD needs 10.5 hours max and that means you either take a hit in the evening or the morning. Anyway we finally seem to have managed to get her to make it consistently until 7.30 and touchwood she hasn't woken before 5.30 for 10 days. That's the compromise I've been looking for. Fingers crossed it' not a coincidence!

Right, gotta concentrate on Tom Daley...

Hi daisylulu - thanks for your reply and sorry to have gone awol. Just been stuck in a sleep deprived stupor for the last week or so....

How's your dd? Have the antibiotics made a difference to her early waking?

Yes I feel the same rage brewing when people tell me about good sleepers. It makes me so jealous, I mean what is it that they do that I don't? I sometimes feel like I'm the only one that's not been let in on the secret that is sleep.

And also people moaning about their child waking them up early when what they mean is a one-off 6am start!! I mean try doing pre-6am for the majority of the last three years!! And relax.....

No real progress on ds2. It's definitely an OT thing with him. We went to stay at my dad's a few weeks ago where things really improved. We were out and about in the afternoons a lot. He always sleeps really well in the car and had usually dropped off in the back on the way home. My dad's house has a driveway out the back so I could leave him asleep in the car and sit snoozing in the garden until he woke.

After two days of this his morning nap started to get longer - more like 1.5 hours instead of waking after 30 mins...or if he did wake he'd easily resettle. He would then do his 1.5 hours in the car in the afternoon. And then he started doing 11 hours at night - for five mornings on the trot he woke at 6.30. I honestly felt like a new woman!

My dad lives by the sea so it was either the sea air or sleep really does breed sleep. I thought we'd cracked it but for some reason as soon as we got home we were back to square one!!

This morning we had a 5.30 start and one grumpy baby. He's just had a 30 min nap, woken really grumpy again and won't go back. Honestly, sleeping, is it really that hard!?!?!

i might need to join this thread..DD is nearly 6 and today tried to get up at 215am for the day props up eyes

I have also come to the conclusion that DD just needs less sleep than other children. About ten hours in her case.

About people with children who sleep. I try to control the rage by repeating to myself that DD eats vegetables and fruit, she is happy, she is developing really well. She is happy and friendly and independent. My friends with children who sleep all have challenges and I wouldn't swap then for mine. Except at 3am last night when I would have killed puppies for a child that sleeps.

Urgh.
5.03am.
That is all.

Well of course teeth had to start up and ruin everything... Sigh!

way we had a similar experience on holiday in Cornwall in June - slept way better than normal, 2nd naps and 11 hour nights.

Terry please can I have a child who eats veg? ;)

2 hr naps

Tonight broccoli, tomato and asparagus and chips it is all me, not luck or genetics at all.

DD has taken up snoring and I am on holidays so cosleeping. So, sleeping but snoring or not sleeping.

Hi again everyone...

With kids, it's always one thing or another isn't it? If it isn't EW, it's naps, if it's not naps, it's teething, not teething then a virus, not a virus then fussy eating, if eating is fine then it's tantrums...and the list goes on.

My question is, when can us mums stop having to just 'suck it up' all the time? I know the answer-never-but we're allowed to rant aren't we???

My PND or AND, or general insanity has been terrible lately so I'm not posting as much...but I'm still lying awake with you all at stupid o clock praying for sleep. I'm thankful DS is sleeping better though-still very erratic but you can't have it all.

As for rage, I've got plenty of that going, I could spit fire at those perfect mummies and daddies with perfect kiddies. I'm sure it's all a big fat act and behind closed doors, they struggle just as much as the rest of us but don't want anyone to know.

DD is not great waybuloony but thanks for asking. She is now on her second course of antibiotics ? I took her back to doctors today for her ears to be checked and I was very relieved when he said the ear infection in her left ear had cleared up ? only to be told she now has one in her right ear. Oh and she?s cutting a molar. Fun fun fun

Sleep is horrific. DD has spent last three nights in bed with me ? I am conscious of the slippery slope we are going down but I am too tired to sit there holding DD upright (only position she will fall asleep in due to pain of ears). It?s ironic that as soon as I start moaning about EWs something more dreadful comes along - its like the cosmos wants to show me things can be a LOT worse. Right now the thought of putting DD to bed at 7.30 and having her sleep through until 5/5.30 feels like a far fetched fantasy....

feeno totally understand where you are coming from. It always feels like one problem is replaced with another. I think I need to lower my expectations of parenting as I have always been a perfectionist and it always seems like everyone else is coping much better or has a better sleeper or eater. But even with the sleep and food issues (dairy/soya allergic) ? I wouldn?t swap DD for anything. She?s happy (well maybe not right now but she?s ill), clever, funny and willfull. I am sure that all parents get their challenges in the end and I like to think that I?m having mine uploaded now.

I think the nail might have been hit on the head re less sleep ? OT aside, when DD was sleeping well a few months ago it was from 7.30/8 until 6. I think DD only needs 10-10.5 hours with a longer nap in the day. And that?s all there is to it. But for now, I need DD to get well, overcome the OT and sleeping in her own bed before I worry about EWs.