So, MNHQ, bedecked in LKBennett (and Boden for the plebs) are all out stuffing pizza and Bolly, half of the posters and hangers-on are there too: what mischief shall we get up to while they're away?

[WilfSell]

Because I bet they've just left BigTech in charge. Or he/she'll be checking in every once in a while, a bit pished and lairy.

So we can DO. WHAT. WE. LIKE. while the Leaders party.

yes Bumper, but your haiku was the one read out by Justine in front of all the meeja and the Prime Minister

and you look lovely in the photo.

We all went 'ahhh!' and felt warm inside (bumper not Johnny B).

They should've let sophable come, but only on the condition that she told everyone she was Liz Jones or somesuch

Onebat, is that you doing the C4 interview with the grey dress and the red lipstick?

i shouted

"oi nice shoes"
at poor old obm

who then traversed room in said shoes

When are we getting the lovely gallery? Presumably any shots of people trying to stroke politicians and steal all the google fruit will not be published on the internet?

I'm second from the right, back row.

Had a crisis-moment when I saw that pic, I thought my matronly BRA was showing three inches over the top of my dress and everyone had been too polite to tell me. On closer inspection it's my Google-label.

I am centre front row of the haiku photo.

Yars spoof. I was grey and red, in all the wrong places.

'traversed' is a euphemism for 'clomped across'

Are you related to Frances de la Tour, perchance?

lol onebat

about three people asked me what lipstick you were wearing as it didn't appear to come off, but I said you just applied it every 30 seconds

Hello apples and nighby and biwi .

Can't see any large thighs so bumper retains an air of mystery.

No, spoof. But I take your point

It is Nars Shanghai Express. The trick is a glaze of dribble, which sets it nicely.

Have you all seen the photo of my friend and I chatting to Gordon? here

the dribble was genius

I took the lid of my expensive make-up in the toilets and it rolled down the back of the Google Sink into a bloody black hole! JJ got on her knees trying to dismantle the entire sink, but it was gorn. So I had to wrap it in some fancy tissue instead.

Oh that's a lovely photo. Everyone' got that slightly mad look that people get when an internationally famous figure comes anywhere near - quick, look natural! But Buzzing you look spectacularly at ease with the Prime Fucking Minister of the United Fucking Kingdom.

MorningPaper, meeting you was my highlight!

And was I the only one that was impressed by the tampon display in the loos?

Thanks, onebatmother. The copious amounts of champagne helped Well, that and the fact that I am not into politics at all (should I admit that?)

Haiku peeps - is nighbynight joking in the lovely email she just sent me? Were the Egyptian footy team at the hotel?! or is she pulling my leg?

MP there are no photos of you because you were too busy telling everyone that your dress was from Asda and cost eight quid that the photographer could only get a blur

In all seriousness, the fab Jo is pulling together an album now and sorry to the haiku people who weren't in the group shot - hopefully Jo or her trusty assistant got you somehow during the rest of the evening - we only had a certain timescale to get the group shots done

The swearing was meant to add to the 'kinell he's 'kin famous innit?' vibe - but appears instead to be expressing Blair-like bitterness. Sorry. Must do work now.

Olivia, yes they were! There were some gorgeous legs around!

I'm off to drink wine (again). Back later

lol @ Blair-like bitterness

No I definitely walked slowly past any cameras and also made the Haiku Table toss their hair and laugh uproariously at me as though I was Terribly Hilarious so that would look impressive

I was very impressed too, almost tempted to take some even though I probably won't have a period for 2 years and have a mooncup anyway, but y'know, it's free stuff. I was also gutted at the meal being so late as I would have liked to stock up on free cheesecake, but it was far too late for me, damn it, should have asked for some to take away!

I didn't realise the biscuits were made by Tate and Lyle, I thought they had been made by one of Justine's kids