It's the 2019 Christmas name change competition! <jingle>

[YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet]

Come they told me
Pa rum pum pum pum
A Christmas name change to see
Pa rum pum pum pum
Our finest gifts to win
Pa rum pum pum pum
A Mumsnet mug maybe some gin
Pa rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum
Rum pum pum pum

HO HO HO! It’s the most wonderful time of the year - the Mumsnet Christmas Name Change Competition.

It’s time to get your box of festive puns down from the attic and spend the next three weeks untangling them even though when you put them away last January they were ABSOLUTELY NOT TANGLED.

Ahem. Anyway - we’re after a Christmas-themed name change that is a play on your usual name. To enter, simply post on this thread under your new name.

The competition will run until December 23rd and we’ll announce the winner on Christmas Eve.

Cheers & good luck to all.

This thread has almost developed in to another mortificado thread

Please will you fix my kitchen ceiling?

Did someone call?

Shall we schmoke?

I'm working up to do some serious flaming, but I need to find someone something for breakfast first.
Do I need to change my name to stay on this thread?

Its beginning to be a right old shitfest,
every thread I go,
take a look at AIBU, they're having a right to do,
with snidey digs and cuntiness that grows.

Its beginning to be a right old shit fest,
Twats on every thread,
But the twattiest thing to me,
is the cunt that wants to be everyone's best friend.

A pair of bitchy remarks and a couple of snarks
are the wish of many on here,
A withering dig, calling someone a pig,
is certain to get a good cheer.
And Mumsnet intervenes until we're cool again.

Its beginning to be a right old shit fest,
Soon my son will fart,
But the thing that'll make me win, with the carols that I sing
Is Justine, the big tart.

Its beginning to be a right old shit fest,
Twats on every thread,
But the twattiest thing to me,
is the cunt who wants to be everyone's best friend.

Sure it's Christmas, The End.

Lad, you are a songsmith extraordinaire. i salute you. I would raise a MN mug in your honour, but tbh, the prize is clearly yours. I'm not sure we even need to bother with the voting, mnhq, just send Lad the prize(s).

with snidey digs and cuntiness that grows

Masterful lyricism @LadzXmasYouShatonmyThigh

I believe you tried to flame me on that thread (acatcalledmortificado), but I have reincarnated as the Kitten Jesus. I vaguely recall seeing you in the stable alongside the donkey and sheep.

Now go and roast some chestnuts with that breath of yours!

LAD FOR THE PRIZE OR WE TORCH IKEA!

Formerly Gingernut83

Played by Dervla Kirwan.
The way this thread has gone it should be Ballycussangle !

TheFestiveIf I like your Christmas name - it's very elegant. [santa]

Screaming what do you mean?

I think TheFestiveIf sounds like some kind of spooky eternal Christmas question, Thigh.

LAD MUST WIN OR IKEA GETS IT!!

Oooer!

Yes, thank you Becky, I'll let them know.

I have an announcement from @MNHQ**

Lad has won, we'd like to thank you all for your efforts.

Merry Christmas and do try again next year.

Oh well that's ok then! Super news!

I'm shocked and thrilled!

What cheering news, thank you Becky and of course our Emperor Thigh. The spirit of George Michael lives.

Gosh! Well! Wow!
I'm overwhelmed.
I'd like to thank a few people, my parents, my DH, my children but it wouldn't be genuine.
They did nothing but hold me back, stifling my creative, sensitive spirit.

With this prize I can establish a scholarship of No Movement. A responsible way to sustain healthy reverse improvement.
It will fund supportive TED talks (it will be me, he can't really talk, he's mute like Sooty) the time to not move forward is NOW!
Thank you.

I’m overcome.

Where is the official announcement as the winner? Am I blind or just dim?