Disablism

[BishopBrennansArse]

Shiny new thread.

Hopefully won't get derailed.

Yeah I get accused of just wanting a row too. Cos I love rowing me.

All them civil rights campaigners. After a row too.

I didn't get anyone banned - HQ make the decision to ban based on how people conduct themselves.

Stop bringing my name back into this thread, please - I've got enough going on.

Waitrose was having a hard time and has all of our sympathy for that, many of us has suffered mc - it is wretched. Coming onto threads about disablism and bashing will not get a good response, she did not like the response she got. The two facts are not particularly related other than that her judgement may be clouded. I hope she understands that no one was having a go at her or her harsh life event and circumstances.

Sorry Waitrose I directed that at you which was wrong of me. I shall rephrase.

Waitrose disclosed her upset re her miscarriage and another poster was banned by HQ due to accusing Waitrose of emotional black mail.

The saame thing has now been done to me. Will that poster be banned?

x post waitrose, I hope you have good support

HQ should take exactly the same action auser - I agree with you.

Thanks Iam - I'm so sorry it's come to this for everyone involved.

Yes, at 22+6 one day before it would have been a birth and a death. Haemorrhaged too. Have every sympathy but getting in an online ruck ultimately won't help mentally.

And that really isn't a pop.

What on earth HQ? You can come on here and delete comments but no actually answer any of the concerns?

Waitrose I would love for you to stick around and try to see things from a different perspective, this is one of my favourite posts from the other thread, Candy is awesome;

CandyMcJingles Sun 16-Oct-16 12:05:00

I haven't read the full thread - I'm VI and it's a lot to read, but here's what I always think and say to disablism

If you haven't got a disability or if you aren't directly impacted by disability (for example a parent of a child or child of a parent with a disability) then don't presume to know better than an actual person with a disability or someone directly impacted by disability. That also applies to professionals working in the disability fields, who insist they know best. No, you don't.
The experts are the people who have a disability or are directly impacted by disability.

Posters regularly highlight that they haven't got a fucking clue.

It's like when I worked in an office of 12 people and the manager said it was safer if I didn't brew up for everyone as me walking round with hot brews with a visual impairment was asking for trouble. The kettle was a bit dodgy too. Do ten of my colleagues would brew up and make a cuppa for me too, knowing I wasn't going to make them a brew back. No problem. But one judgemental ignorance person never ever made me a brew. She would brew up for everyone else and miss me out.she resented my special treatment and I was punished for it. When I then fell badly due to my VI and was off work rehabilitating and undergoing additional mobility training (I now have a guide dog), she complained to my manager about a photo on FB showing me in a restaurant for a major family birthday. Going out and about was obviously part of my rehab.

That spiteful ignorant person has no idea what it is like to live 24/7 with a disability but still get up and try to function as best as possible. And then deal with shitty attitudes on top of that.

And the posters making disablist remarks are just like that shitty ex colleague. I'm very glad I'm not that person. I'd much rather be me.

I think some posters need to get their heads around the fact that this is a societal issue.
The frustration and upset comes from the pointless hope that people will see the disablism when they are not directly affected - they won't.
And the fury, the hostility and the anger is because people don't like reflected back at them the idea that they have a basic prejudice - who wants to admit that?

Mnhq are sincere in their intent imho. I think they see themselves as incredibly supportive of people with disabilities. I think they want to do the right thing.
But banging up against that is the complacent selfishness of most people.

The 'home for challenging teenagers' is a case in point.
You could pick 100 people at random and most would say 'but the property will have no resale value if it's next to a home like that - it's reasonable not to buy on that basis alone'
But they forget that in the lifetime of many of us it was seen as perfectly valid to object to black or Irish people moving into a neighbourhood because it would damage the value of homes.
Was that valid and reasonable?

Of course people pointing out disablism isn't popular. Mn is packed with people who wouldn't want any kind of supported accommodation next to them but they don't want to be made to feel bad about admitting it.
They want to be able to see themselves as fair minded and open and supportive of minorities - right up to the point where it inconveniences or impacts them.

Maybe try seeing that those who howl the loudest might just be the ones privately uncomfortable that they are kidding themselves about being pragmatic when they are just being nimbys.

A very wise post, Pag. Spot on, Though I'm not sure about MMHQ. I think they vary widely, depending who's on shift. But you're absolutely right. People want to think they're not bigoted or discriminating, when they clearly are.

Fucking hell pag well said. The people on the other thread need to see that post IMO.

I agree with you pagwatch.
I am really uncomfortable with majority, mainstream groups telling minority, marginalised groups how to think, feel and behave too. It's an extension of the ignorance.

Yep Owlady.

I'm supposed to be on holiday so I'm buggering off.

take care all.

I agree pag.

Being the one to point out bullshit doesn't make you popular.

Shit. I posted on that thread.
I thought a support facility for behaviourally difficult teens was just that; and the OP is a single Mum overreaching herself financially as it is; hence the bulk of the replies I think.
Would a residential facility for teens with a disability which might include behavioural issues be described that way? I thought they were generally care homes/supported living but not specifying behaviour as it's a symptom of a bigger issue? I feel awful.

my friend just posted this on FB.

I have a new name for MNHQ "Status Quo Warriors"

“One of the great liabilities of history is that all too many people fail to remain awake through great periods of social change. Every society has its protectors of status quo and its fraternities of the indifferent who are notorious for sleeping through revolutions. Today, our very survival depends on our ability to stay awake, to adjust to new ideas, to remain vigilant and to face the challenge of change.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.

specifying behaviour as it's a symptom of a bigger issue? I
They are called behavioural difficulties because everyday behaviour is different to those of a similar age, for example with attention / concentration and impulse control. It doesn't actually mean naughty / violent and so on.

Well idiots like me then have replied to that thread as it it's a step down from YOI. Hence the overwhelming negativity.

Nobody really minds posters like you elf, you genuinely want to be educated on the matters and accept that yes, you had it wrong.

If everybody was like you it wouldn't matter and the education aspect MNHQ are going for woudl work, but other posters are not, they are goady fuckers that don't want to be educated and instead insist that they know it all and are right.

Unsuprisingly this also applys to quite a few at MNHQ too.