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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

MNHQ

Which aspects of looking after a baby did you just not *get*?

158 replies

KateMumsnet · 25/07/2014 15:10

Hello all

The eagle-eyed amongst you will have noticed that we've been making a few videos recently - if you haven't had a look, do nip over to our new Video page for a quick squizz. And do also subscribe to our YouTube channel: it takes literally 3 secs (and you won't be bombarded with YouTube emails, promise!).

Anyway - we're planning a series of 'How To' videos for new parents, and we thought we'd ask you to cast your mind back to those early days, and tell us which aspects of looking after a baby would have been much easier if you'd had a step-by-step video to help you. Things like 'how to swaddle a newborn' .

Do let us know what you'd have liked to have seen clearly demonstrated - whether newborn-related, or with older babies. We'd also love to hear the cunning baby and/or toddler care 'hacks' which have made life easier: we'll compile them into a vid to spread the joy.

Thanks in advance,

MNHQ

OP posts:
olaflikeswarmhugs · 25/07/2014 21:26

Three I did the nose thing with dd it worked wonders !!

Does not work with ds Sad

IwishIwasmoreorganised · 25/07/2014 21:35

Signs of tiredness - because believe it or not they're not always crying because they're hungry. It took me weeks to figure that out Blush

Swaddling would be good.

Bathing a newborn singlehandedly

Nursery rhymes - I had long forgotten the ones that i knew as a child.

RedKites · 25/07/2014 22:12

Early feeding cues. In the early weeks of DS1's life, he struggled with weight gain. Everyone (MWs, HVs) kept asking if I was feeding him on demand, and I would assure them I was. It was only later that I understood that crying is a late hunger cue, and that I'd been missing earlier ones, and no-one had checked I understood what they meant. We muddled our way through, and it all worked out ok, but it would have made the first few weeks of his life so much easier if I had known this in advance.

TheDayOfMyDoctor · 25/07/2014 22:16

How quickly to increase the volume of expressed or formula milk to feed in the first few days. DS wouldn't take to breast feeding so I was mixed feeding, and when the midwife came to visit me at home she told me I wasn't giving anywhere near enough. I felt awful that I was under feeding my baby. I'd always expected to bf, and just had no idea how much/quickly to increase the milk once I got home.

Greyhound · 25/07/2014 22:16

I naively assumed all baby care would come to me instinctively.

I didn't ever work out how to wind a baby or get it into any kind of routine.

weatherall · 25/07/2014 22:20

How to put on a nappy!

I'd never done it before and was left to figure it out for myself. I remember it being quite scary.

Also giving a baby a bath.

Both of the above when the umbilicus is still attached.

Different breastfeeding positions.

How to fold a pram into the car.

How to brush baby teeth.

How to check if toddler shoes fit or are too right and need replaced.

TheDayOfMyDoctor · 25/07/2014 22:23

Oh, and the basics of using cloth nappies. I had done a lot of research on cloth nappies and remember turning in desperation to MN when on the first day I tried them DS screamed the house down all day and I was changing his nappy every half hour. Some very wise MNers Thankstold me to try fleece liners (my research had led me to believe that I should avoid them as they're no good for newborn poo). I did, the problem was solved and successfully went on to use cloth nappies until DS was potty trained.

Homebird8 · 25/07/2014 22:34

How to avoid the fountain effect of taking a warm wet nappy off a baby boy by dropping a dry facecloth over the sprinkler to reduce the cold shock that makes it happen and soak up any spurting before it hits you in the eye.

MNHQ
IonaMumsnet · 25/07/2014 22:35

This is all GOLD. Thanks folks. Keep 'em coming.

MsBug · 25/07/2014 22:56

Yes to redkites' suggestion - I also thought crying= hunger, and didn't know about the earlier signs of hunger

ShineSmile · 25/07/2014 23:15

How to put nappy on

How to feed lying down. If baby wakes up at night, feed it lying down in the dark, so that it goes back to sleep and you get some sleep too (seems so obvious now; wasn't so obvious then)

How to bottle feed, including sterilising etc

ShineSmile · 25/07/2014 23:16

Tongue tie

Silent reflux

JourneyingAlong · 26/07/2014 00:14

Tongue tie.

That it is completely normal for them to STILL be waking at night several months in. Somehow I didn't realise that was part of the deal.

CrewElla · 26/07/2014 06:36

Getting the lovely sleeping baby from your arms to the Moses basket or crib so you too can sleep.

Kelly1814 · 26/07/2014 06:37

All their differnt types of cries. Try as I might, they all sounded the same for the first few months!

That you might get a baby that doesn't sleep more than an hour. And need feeding every hour or two. That this might last for 6 months.

Everyone said "get through the first 6-8 weeks, then they'll sleep."

YEAH RIGHT.

Elesbe · 26/07/2014 07:16

This thread is making me feel so sad. I nursed in the 1970's before having my four DC's. In the week that a new mum stayed in hospital after having their precious baby most of the skills that are being requested were demonstrated and advised on. Where have we gone wrong? I can't believe that midwives and health visitors are not even allowed to show how to make up formula these days!

FamiliesShareGerms · 26/07/2014 07:58

Opening and closing prams and buggies

Opening and closing stair gates

JourneyingAlong · 26/07/2014 08:15

Elesbe - my mother had me in the late 70s. She was completely shocked when they released me after an emergency c section after 2-3 days.

She thought I needed to recover, but more importantly she thought I hadn't been taught how to do anything! She hadn't a clue about meconium when I was cleaning her as "the midwives did all that!"

Batmam · 26/07/2014 08:19

Bathing a tiny newborn, and how to quickly and properly dry all those nooks and crannies.

How to breastfeed safely in a baby sling.

How to give a baby massage that will make them sleep through the night

How to clean up chunky toddler sick from her bedding/carpet/hair without vomming yourself (me at 5am this morning ??)

Batmam · 26/07/2014 08:26

What a good bf latch looks like.

How to hand express.

beccajoh · 26/07/2014 08:42

Apparently babies come pre-loaded with different types of cries. Except mine didn't, or I could never work them out.

How to breastfeed a baby that won't open its mouth.

GretchenWiener · 26/07/2014 08:44

That they cry for no reason.

Toadsrevisited · 26/07/2014 10:27

What to do if you think you have PND.

Bryonyc · 26/07/2014 10:56

Breastfeeding was the one I just couldn't get.
I would be in tears at 3am, poring over photos in a NCT leaflet and wailing helplessly at my inability to latch my baby on.

I had loads of people try to show me, shoving DD's head around and yanking my breasts, arms, hands, breasts again into position, tugging on my shoulders and bellowing "relax your shoulders, you need to relax".

They were probably right, as if by some miracle I managed to get her to latch on, I would then remain totally rigid and immobile in case I made her slip off again.

It took me weeks and weeks to get the hang of it.

My other one would be, how to tell if your baby has tongue tie.

VenusDeWillendorf · 26/07/2014 10:59

Changing a nappy quickly and without the faff of a change mat.

Put a clean nappy under the baby BEFORE you take off the wet/ dirty one. This way you don't need to use a change mat.
Open old nappy, clean baby's bum thoroughly and place all used wipes into the old nappy, roll it up, lift it out, and close it using the Velcro straps of the nappy. For boys who like to pee, put a wipe over them, and then roll it in to the old nappy.

Baby is in clean nappy with no poo anywhere. (Make sure the ruffles are all out to avoid leaks.)
My sister showed me this and I've shown it to others and they cannot believe how neat and quick it is, also, everything is to hand.

I used to carry one or two nappies and a small ziplock bag of wipes in my handbag when out. No change bag and faffing about for us!