Bloggers Specials this week

[HandDivedScallopsrgreat]

Hi MNHQ,

I wonder if you could tell me the reason behind endorsing/promoting a blog regarding a wife who believes her husband, a convicted rapist, is innocent. I was quite shocked to find it in the weekly parenting news e-mail.

There are a lot of women on MN who have been victims of rape and whose attackers will never be brought to justice. It is incredibly hard to get a rape conviction due to all the rape myths, one of which is women lie and the man didn't do it. I feel it is insulting to the victims of rape and could be triggering.

A couple of months ago you were asked to support a campaign to help dispel rape mytha which you looked on favourably here but endorsing this blog seems to fly in the face of that.

Thanks

I wanted to know about this too.

I don't know anything about this woman, and do not wish to make harsh judgments of her. I understand she truly believes her husband to be innocent. But this blog clearly receives and invites a lot of strong reaction, which is directed against this woman. IMO it diverts attention from the serious issue of rape, and from the person who, in this case, has been found guilty: her husband. I think promoting the blog trivializes the issue of rape and deflects attention from the survivors who need support, and from those who perpetrate this crime.

I was really upset by it.

I'm adding my concern about this. Is this some anti-woman drive that MNHQ is on? We already get told, so often, about women who "lie" about rape, by those trying to stir discord in certain areas. last thing we need is fuel for those individuals. last thing we need is a message going out to rape victim's that the men locked up for rape are more important than the victims. I'm curious as to mnhq's reasoning behind this.

Really?

What is the name of the blog? Just enough so I can find it, not so that it gets more promotion if possible please. I don't get the weekly email. Just the round-up.

I have just had a quick glance and it makes me very, very uncomfortable - it's the assertion that there is no way that he is guilty but there is no discussion of why she is so convinced of that. What about the victim? Where is she in this? What is the basis on which bloggers are accepted to the MN Bloggers Network?

Isla - it's convicts wife dot com (I'm not making a link that is googlable)

Thank you. I'll go in via the bloggers bit so it doesn't register via Google chrome either.

Thank you for starting this thread HandDived. I can't understand why MN would endorse this blog and I too am quite upset by it.

The reasoning behind this confused me too - it's not a terribly interesting blog just from the point of view of the quality of writing or the frequency of updates, so the only reason I can see for featuring it is the issue of a wife supporting a husband who has been convicted of rape. Which is a little disturbing to say the least.

A court has found him guilty, and the blog isn't a campaign about a supposed miscarriage of justice.

I've found it now and read the last two posts and the first two.

I have a couple of strong opinions about it (please read both properly before jumping on me):

Firstly, the author absolutely should be free to write whatever she wants on the blog so long as it's legal. Nothing she's posted is illegal.

Secondly, Mumsnet has no place promoting the blog of a rape denier. Absolutely none. When rape convictions are so pathetically low in this country the fact this man has been tried and convicted is no trivial thing.

If the blog was just about the struggle of life with the family whilst one's husband is in prison fair enough but it's the repeated protestations of innocence of a convicted rapist that are just not appropriate.

MNHQ, will you have a look at this blog again please? Thank you

Yes, no-one is saying she shouldn't be allowed to write this stuff. It's the way MN has endorsed it by adding it to the bloggers' network and, not only that, made it blog of the week that's the problem imho.

Yup. Exactly that Proles.

That is pretty much where I stand Isladoit.

It's my blog

I would genuinely like to know how I'm "insulting to the victims of rape" as per the first post? That's certainly not my intention. I'm merely telling my story, of a family seperated by what I (and quite a lot of other people) believe to be a wrongful conviction. I totally appreciate that it must be a hideous experiences for the victims. But my blog isn't about the so called victim in this instance, it's about me and the children. It isn't really even about DP, he just features in it as I experience Prison life through him.

I'm really sorry it's upset all of you, never my intention. I was thrilled to be chosen as blog of the week but I'm going to report this, ask MN to offer their view on this thread and then ask them to pull the thread and their publicity of me.

By the way. If you don't like the look of it - you don't have to read it you know... I have had some very positive comments, and some very supportive people comment.

If you hadn't mentioned the crime on your blog Jently, it would have been very different. He was convicted of rape and you say that this was a wrongful conviction, despite the fact it's almost impossible to get convictions for rape. This implies that the victim (not "so-called" victim) was a liar.

Not sure what Mumsnet can do about this now as it's already gone out in their newsletter.

Also, I don't know what Mumsnet were thinking of with regards to you, surely they'd have realised that a blog like this would have a negative reaction from at least some people. I'm not sure it was fair of them to put you through that kind of controversy.

Handmaiden

Yes it does. Thanks for that.

I too have had a lot of support here for the situation I find myself in, MN is generally a top place.

I'm sorry you don't agree with my blog or seem to have any sympathy for what me and my children are living through.

I'm walking away from this now & hope MNHQ are along soon.

Thank you thunder I suppose I've asked for this, should have seen it coming.... This is the first negativity I've seen & it's knocked me for 6.

I agree that MN is at fault here for showing extremely poor judgement in endorsing the blog and giving it extra publicity by making it blog of the week. I can't for the life of me work out why they made that decision.

AmorYCohetes, I'm so sorry to hear of your awful experience and I hope you're OK

Well I don't think you have asked for this Jently, unless you specifically asked Mumsnet to feature your blog in their newsletter. Otherwise I assume that your blog would have a limited audience, and wouldn't be seen by people who might find it upsetting or hurtful.

Unfortunate all round is what I would say.

Ooh. I got the email but haven't yet read the blog. Someone seems to have had an error of judgement.

Amor, I hope you're ok :(

Jently I think the majority of posts have been very fair. As I and other posters have pointed out we completely support your right to post and post whatever you like, even if we don't agree with parts of the content. What we don't agree with is the promotion by MN of your blog.

I feel you are not looking at this objectively (understandably - completely understandably) and are being upset by this. Nobody is angry with you for having a blog, we are dismayed MN would choose to promote it because of the rape issue.

I hope you can see the point I'm trying to make. I have a lot of sympathy for your situation and I feel for you.

thunder no, def didn't ask to be included.

It's all very unfortunate, I agree.

Thanks Isla, your totally right. I am upset but what you've posted is true, I'm having trouble being objective

Thank you for being so kind