Bloggers Specials this week

[HandDivedScallopsrgreat]

Hi MNHQ,

I wonder if you could tell me the reason behind endorsing/promoting a blog regarding a wife who believes her husband, a convicted rapist, is innocent. I was quite shocked to find it in the weekly parenting news e-mail.

There are a lot of women on MN who have been victims of rape and whose attackers will never be brought to justice. It is incredibly hard to get a rape conviction due to all the rape myths, one of which is women lie and the man didn't do it. I feel it is insulting to the victims of rape and could be triggering.

A couple of months ago you were asked to support a campaign to help dispel rape mytha which you looked on favourably here but endorsing this blog seems to fly in the face of that.

Thanks

You know what Wannabe I don't think you're right.

I think there's a lot of compassion out there for the blogger. As LRD said, no one would enable her, but enabling isn't real support.

I am absolutely certain you presume wrongly, there.

If you read this thread, you'll see a lot of posts expressing concern for this woman. And I think it's fair to say a lot of the posters here are often found on threads supporting women who're in relationships with violent men. When jently did post, people replied with compassion despite being upset by what she said. There are no deleted posts or personal insults on this thread, which does rather suggest the restraint of posters given the sensitivity of the topic.

She has posted and she and I have had an exchange. It was all very civilised.

I disagree that MN should ban blogs by the partners of convicted criminals. Family life with mum/dad behind bars is interesting, potentially compelling and potentially helpful to anyone raising children alone regardless of circumstance. There is the potential to be inspirational and indirectly supportive.

The blog of an abused woman who denies her convicted husband is a rapist does not do that and is not the same thing at all.

The objection is to the content of the blog.

Thank you to everyone who posted support. I am very aware that the content of my blog and my thoughts have upset a great many people and for that I also grovel apologise.

I think MN / Blog MN made an error of judgement, as perhaps did I. I have been removed from the Bloggers network. They have apologised and perhaps an explanation will follow.

I am also leaving MN. I don't feel it's a safe place for me to come any more, whether I name change or not. I just thought I'd let those of you who have asked know, that I am ok but very shaken by this.
Jently

Sorry, to clarift I meant apologised on this thread. I have also had an emailed apology.

I hope you find an alternative source of support, if you are determined to leave, Jently- we are still here if you ever want to return and post, and nobody will be judging you.

I hope you feel able to come back to MN, jently. It sounds like you've had lots of support on MN and it would be really sad if you don't feel able to continue accessing this wonderful source of support and friendship. You could just have some of the identifying posts deleted and do a namechange and that would protect your privacy. I can understand how this thread must've shaken you and hope it's clear that the criticisms have been aimed at MN's judgement, not at you personally. Take care of yourself and good luck.

I hope you find support too. I can understand why you are shaken. Thanks for coming back and apologizing, that must have taken a huge amount of courage.

Jently there is no reason for you to leave Mumsnet other than if you want to. You will have nothing but support from all of us here (on this thread. I know some people are less pleasant on the boards sometimes) even if you post as Jently after this thread.

I hope you feel able to stick around. Sincerely.

Jently - please don't feel you have to leave. If you namechange, you can still get all the support I'm sure you need at what must be a very, very difficult time for you.

And thank you for your apology - that must have taken a lot of courage and I really appreciate it.

Jently you'll always find support on MN.

Please don't be put off by the assumption that the peanut gallery will hijack any threads.

We'll support you, whether you name change or not.

Also can I echo the advice to just get MN to delete any identifying posts - they are very good on that. If you do choose to leave MN altogether, I do hope you find another source of real support.

Jently
Well done for coming back. You have nothing to apologise for but it took guts to come back to this thread and do so.

I hope that you will stick around. Namechange if you would feel better, but there is a lot of support here for you.

I think Jently has already left. Sad.

I haven't contributed to this thread but I have read Jently's blog (a while ago) and am a blogger myself. I have to admit, not being fully aware of the issues and obviously my radar not fully alert, I read it purely as a convicts wife and the issues as a single parent visiting her husband in prison. I am on Jently's FB page and I know she's gutted about what's happened here. I have told her that you all think she was very brave to come back and that I thought this was a really well reasoned discussion thread, as someone else said up thread, this is MN at it's best. I also said that I hope she will consider coming back as she would find a lot of support on MN.

I'm glad she has you for support. I do hope she comes back.