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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

What is the point of the AIBU section?

125 replies

Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 13:16

It's been around for a while now and anyone can see it's become really gladiatorial.

It's frankly an absolute pit...it's dreadful.

I have had it hidden for months now which makes my personal MN a lovely place to be, but as soon as I venture into that topic I find myself wanting to leave the whole site.

There must be some way to offload it surely...why not have it as a spin off site, separate from MN? The thing is, many people who come here will see all the nonsense of it in active convos and likely be put off completely if they have any sensitivity whatsoever.

I think it's a disgrace and brings us all into disrepute. In fact I used to recommend MN to all and sundry, but now I am ashamed to because of AIBU being such an apparently popular and sizeable part of the site.

I don't know what to do about that. The rest of the place is pretty balanced. But it's like Jeremy Kyle Corner.

OP posts:
UnePrune · 07/09/2010 14:06

I remember when it started...I didn't think it was a good change.
I guess it stays because the gazillion page views it generates are good for advertising revenue?

SiriusStar · 07/09/2010 14:13

Flight, Thank you.

MrsDoofenshmirtz · 07/09/2010 14:16

I have just hidden it having let it ruin my day.

A long long time ago I let one of the special needs AIBUs really upset me. It really really upset me, I didn't want to take my child out for a while. I had never realised (perhaps naively) that people viewed my child in that light. I think it has changed my opinion of human nature forever.

I have name changed since and had not been back for ages. Now it is hidden, Thanks Flight.

pagwatch · 07/09/2010 14:18

MrsDoof

That is so sad. I am sorry that a thread upset you so much.

I tend to let it be water off a ducks back. But I think that whilst MN reminds me of how smart and informative my fellow man can be I too now am quite sad when I read what some people are capeable of writing.

MrsDoofenshmirtz · 07/09/2010 14:21

Its a funny thing though isn't it. I wouldn't go back to not knowing that is how people feel. Now I notice the comments and people looking at us a lot more. Maybe, it has made me wiser and that would be a good thing. Who knows.

The information and help that i have had over the years from here really outweighs all that.

Oblomov · 07/09/2010 14:55

Flight, why do you keep fighting for this ? You have made suggestions to Mn towers, but they have not actioned them. Have they explained why ?
Presumably alot of initial MN visitors arrive due to AIBU. Presumably MN towers wants AIBU.
You are fighting for something that the powers-that-be, don't want. for whatever their reasons.

bigchris · 07/09/2010 14:57

I can't understand why you don't just hide it if it upsets you

Original poster
Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 15:40

Okay, been out...

BigChris, I don't understand why you keep telling me to hide it when I've already said I've had it hidden for ages. You said that on the other thread too. I already have it hidden but it's not just about me.

I think it's bad for mumsnet as a whole.

Mrs Doof that is terrible, I am so sorry you have been through that. All I can think is that the thread in question was probably designed to upset people. Sometimes that happens. It's deliberate and intolerable and I believe AIBU encourages it.

Oblomov, I've only started one thread about this on site stuff and that was many months ago. MNHQ responded using some of the arguments already cited on this one, but I would be interested to see how much their viewpoint has changed lately. There were far more counter-posts on the previous thread AFAIK from ordinary MNers.

I did ask people the other day how many had hidden AIBU, in chat. There were quite a few.

Are you suggesting that I ought to let it be? Why? I still care about it and things change all the time. What seemed reasonable (forgive expression) to MNHQ about 6 months ago might not now.

OP posts:
OmicronPersei8 · 07/09/2010 15:52

I've had AIBU hidden for a while now, as I was getting very stressed by it. I enjoy MN much more now. At the time of hiding I was told I'd want it back in a week, I'd get bored etc, but I can honestly say MN is just MN again without it.

I can see your point Flight about it effecting the whole look and feel of the site. I don't know what the answer is though, I can't see MN getting rid of it now - so much traffic.

Oblomov · 07/09/2010 16:10

O.K.

Oblomov · 07/09/2010 16:17

o.k.
we all know its gettign worse. but they clearly still don't want to do anything. ask them again. it must come down to revenue surely.
lots of things i don't like about mn. but what can you do. years ago it was fine. then GF. the mail. moldies.
its changed.
but what can we do. there are always reasons why these suggested changes don't get activated. normally comes down to lining someones pocket.

Oblomov · 07/09/2010 16:24

10 years ago, 2 ladies set up MN for the benefit of other ladies. to exchange parenting ideas.
but with so many things along the way things change.
is it here to serve us now? is it buggery. its a business. status. famous. money. buddies with the PM and his wife. 10 year party. excuse me while i vomit.
but this happens all the time.
nothing that can be donw about it.
I try and ignore,and just appreciate it for all the fab bits, that were always there, and are still there.

bigchris · 07/09/2010 16:30

Sorry for repeating myself Grin

I don't know how you can click on a thread if you've hidden it that's all

I must be thick

Original poster
Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 17:31

No of course you're not thick. I occasionally click on one of the aibus in the box on the right, most active, discussions of the day etc.
I can't see anything in active convos, only threads I'm on.

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 17:52

mixed bag of responses.worth keeping as its candour is invaluable.ease up on the hyperbolic rhetoric aibu doesnt bring disgrace and disrepute on anyone.there is no collective us all.for everyone who loves aibu another hates it

i dislike feeding threads and the debacle about mode of feeding.imo,causes much upset,source of really shitty reseach and links to guru mutterings.but hell i dont want it banned

you have choice not to read aibu,just as i want choice to read and participate in it

KindleOfKittens · 07/09/2010 17:55

I don't think that we can critiscise MN founders/owners for 'lining their pockets'

It is a business not a charidee

scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 17:58

mn is a business and brand,not a therapeutic hippy community.if anyone cant hack a topic dont click on it,but chuntering about mn as if it owes anyone a duty of care is daft

Original poster
Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 20:19

See you go on about hyperbole SM but you really outdo all of us, you know Smile

Therapeutic hippy community?

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 20:31

youre harrumphing more than disgusted of tonbridge wells.all that disgrace and disrepute.mind you dont get heratburn

scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 20:33

see now is good aibu,some argy bargy.all we need now is wee humphy facesAngry and B-I-N-G-O

Original poster
Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 20:34

LOL!

OP posts:
scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 20:34

aha,thats better.better oot than in i always say

Original poster
Flighttattendant · 07/09/2010 20:35

anyway it was Pag what was going on about turds.

That bit was excellent.

OP posts:
Shaz10 · 07/09/2010 20:39

I quite like a bit of AIBU now and again. I sometimes get bored of being nice. :) It's like a walk in a blustery wind. Blows the cobwebs away.

scottishmummy · 07/09/2010 20:42

flight do you not participate on aibu?dont know what you are missing

best ones are the posters who are patently unreasonable,get told so and have a hissy fit.processing to boldly thank few acolytes and piss on everyone else chips with a big ole youse is all bitches/bitchfest/i was telt aboot mn

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