Killing Kittens age limit?

[Bengal12]

I am thinking about going to a KK party BUT I’ve heard that their cut off age is 45?
while I am slightly older, I (luckily) don’t look it but I would prefer not to fib about my age, it’s not a school disco!
Any experience of being rejected by KK for being too old?🙄

@Estherpologist

I don’t think Heliodor is being ironic.
But I do think she has some deep issues with men.
Her posts out is all jumbled. And sort of superior Me Vs men, inferior as a class.

….. I want men to fight to have sex with me - I don’t want to have PIV…
…… I am submissive - I want men to serve me naked
….. Women on sex apps are strong individuals, with agency, need to have respect ….. if they fall in love with play partners, they are clearly raped and duped by Stockholm syndrome
….. Men are misogynistic - I prefer men to pay for me

I hope she finds what she is looking for as it’s not easy to be this angry at the world.

@PinotPony - that's good to hear: I won't give up on it just yet!

@josuk - when you say you couldn't have imagined it at my age either, what do you mean?

@WitheringTights000

I guess in my late 20s- early 30s - I was more focused on building a career and dating in a traditional sense. I knew i wanted to have kids at some point. I was mildly curious about women, most of my life, but not enough to bother acting on it.
I think - most of all - after dating with lots is emotional ups and downs in early 20s - I wanted to fall in love and have a partner who wanted to share a life.

I have always liked sex - but I think the idea of being serious with a partner, but also me (or him) having sex with other people would have felt threatening to me. Maybe it was my insecurity, or maybe nature’s programming of forming a unit to raise kids - I do not know.

After kids, and eventually after divorcing - it felt different. I don’t feel threatened by our joint KK experiences; and I have recognised my own needs and let myself explore and let go.

Maybe if I met and married someone closer to me in temperament - it would have been a possibly with my exH. It does work for some people. Did not for me. (It wasn’t the reason we divorced though. )

You usually get men to pick up the bill for everything? Jeez I hope you're being ironic! 🤣🤣🤣😱

Yes, they pay for everything and are glad to. I save my money and put it in a pension fund. Much more empowering. 50/50 is a scam.

So the men you choose to engage with in a sexual or romantic way are happy to pay (indirectly) for that experience and you're happy to fund your lifestyle (at least indirectly) as a result of their financial contributions?
Fascinating.
Would you be happy to take their cash?

And you think that financial parity between the genders is a scam.
That's almost as interesting.

Somewhere along the line, I can't help but think you're taking the piss. I'm just not sure whether that's at the expense of those contributing to this thread, or the men you date.

It's fairer and more equitable. Consider it a form of wealth redistribution.

@josuk - thanks for your reply!

I am not looking to have kids but would like to be married!

And yes I think with me I would feel threatened with a husband/partner wanting to play with others, I think it would make me feel insecure!

So you joined KK single but are now in a relationship with someone who is also KK, and it doesn't bother you anymore? Is that what you mean?

@WitheringTights000

I came to KK post divorce before meeting my partner. Was looking for new experiences, particularly to play with women. Didn’t actually get to - as wasn’t quite sure what I wanted and how.
Then met my now partner elsewhere. And after a while, when our relationship got to a good and secure place - we thought about experimenting and came back to KK as a couple.
It was a learning experience and took a bit of time to figure out what works/doesn’t for us as a couple.

We aren’t poly- - as in we don’t share emotional connections with other people.
For us - it’s more a hedonistic experience we share together with other fun and attractive people that we like as friends.
And as such - it’s not threatening to our relationship - rather adds to it.

I liked KK, we joined during lockdown and loved their online parties, met some great people and still in touch with a few, just platonic, we stopped because of renewal fees and the group for our region has turned a little stagnant. Would happily rejoin though.

@josuk-

Thanks for your message! It's great to hear that you are able to do that in your relationship and that it is secure etc/ you have the confidence to do that together!

I don't know if I ever would have the confidence to do that, but maybe with time I would, who knows....so when you say you aren't 'poly' , that means it's strictly just sex with others, as in you wouldn't hang out/text/chat with someone who isn't your partner?

@WitheringTights000

I wouldn’t have had confidence at 30 either! But after love, heartbreak, a marriage, kids, divorce - I am at a different place. I am happy with my partner, but am also OK on my own. I am not with him because I need him - we are together because we want to be. Both know how precious that is.
I don’t have much that I need to prove to myself or anyone.

My understanding of ‘poly’ relationships is when people in a couple have separate parallel secondary relationships with other men or women. As in - spend significant time, overnights, dinners, emotional support/involvement.

We - more have a loose network of friends that we also sometimes ‘play’ with. And we only play together - we don’t go off on our own to meet different people - so it’s a joint experience.
We are all busy with own lives anyway - and have regular non-KK friends we also spend time with.
With people we know for a while - we do chat about their/our lives, of course. But it’s not some full on sort of connection.
And sometimes we meet new people on KK, have drinks, play with and not see them again. It depends. Life gets in the way.

We don’t play with others too often anyway - don’t want it to become some routine.

@josuk- yes, it sounds like you are content with yourself and your life and you have found a partner that compliments that,rather than needing to have someone.

Great place to be at and that's the place I need to arrive at lol, it's really hard though when every single friend is coupled up!

I know I was complaining about older men on KK being creepy,

But I'm not ageist as I did see a 52 year old guy I liked the look of so added him as a connection....started off talking to me normally and then started the dirty talk 😂😂

I know It's KK, but I just thought men from that generation/era were more respectable/ more gentlemanly....like I did not think they would talk like that...I've obviously been living in a bubble!

I admit I like a bit of a gentlemen....so maybe looking in the wrong place....🥺

I'm surprised you think men in their 50s would be more "gentlemany". In my experience, there was more door-holding and ladies-first in the 80s, but there were more arse slaps and wolf whistles from scaffolding too.

@Estherpologist - I don't know why I think that, I guess it's just because the phrases/things they are coming out with, I find childish/teenagerish...I mean they aren't teenagers so why speak like one?

They manage to hold down responsible/serious adult jobs, so I guess I'm thinking then why can't they be an adult in their dating life also!

And these men have kids also! Potentially daughters, so obviously it's in my head well how would they feel if some man spoke to their daughter like that someday?

Ffs it's just a joke.

Argh. I’ve name changed to post here but I’ve been around for years. Recently separated from husband. Years of terrible sex. Felt rampant since I left him. I wish I had the confidence to go to one of these events… but I’m not there yet. I don’t think I could walk in alone.

@Ihatepickingausername3 - why not go to a smaller meet up first?

I've now been asked by a guy on the KK app if I will go to a 'passing fancies' Party with him and a group of his friends next month

It's different from KK apparently! He is going with a group but they need one more girl....I won't be going as dont fancy or will compete strangers ....

But has anyone heard of these?

@Ihatepickingausername3 - I will probably go to the July party in London with my FWB. My first time ever so nervous but there should be a social meet-up beforehand to get to know others, which I will attend.
Will let you know if I do go if you want to ho together. And don’t worry, absolutely no hidden agenda!
Separately, glad to see how popular this thread has become. Have been busy with family so have not been able to follow in real time but catching up fast and loving how open people have been with sharing their experiences.
@josuk , I value your insights, feel like I’m following a similar trajectory of thought patterns; thank you for articulating it so well!

@Bengal12
Any time. You can PM too, if you want to talk/ask anything.
KK is a journey. Certainly was for me - both in figuring out what I like, what works for me individually and what we are as a couple.

@Ihatepickingausername3 You don’t need to join KK and head to an orgy right away. Or at all. It’s a community - you can talk to people, meet or not meet anyone. You may simply meet one likeminded person you would click with. And certainly - meet other women that are going through the same.

Yes please @Bengal12

and @josuk I've joined! I think. Everything needs verifying and approval though. Fingers crossed!

Any new or otherwise joiners please feel free to send PerthshireFox an invite so that you can be added to the KK MN chat group.

How do I do that @ScottishZoe?

Never mind! I think I might have managed 😄

Nobody walks in alone! There's a party chat which opens a fortnight beforehand and people always arrange pre-drinks so you can arrange to find each other before the masks go on. Lots of single women agree to go to the venue in a group.

Plus lots of discussion early on about which hotels to book so you can "coincidentally" be staying in the same hotel as that hot person who caught your eye... 😂

I've not heard of that one.. but I agree it's not a great idea to go to a party with a complete stranger. I did that once... never again!