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Is it desperate to message him

119 replies

KnickersInADrawer · 18/08/2021 15:51

Essentially was invited to ‘join for a drink’ for tomorrow.
A few months ago a Friend, let’s call her X, invited me out with one of her former colleagues (Mr Y) and he brought a friend along too. We all had too much to drink, Mr Y and I ended up kissing all night and he went down on me but it didn’t go any further. The next morning he asked my friend for my number and he text me to say I should have gone back to his with him and asking when I was next in his city. Flirting too such as ‘next time whisper what I’m good at’.

So a few months have passed and then he messaged me on Friday night to say he was with his friend and they were just discussing that night. He asked when I’m next in his city and I said this Thursday as I have a meeting, we discussed the meeting and he said ‘if you’re here on Thursday then join for a drink?’ I tried to be casual by responding that Thursday could be fun with a wink face. He gave a flirty response about working Hard Miss and then asked if I’m staying in his city after the exam- I responded yes and that’s where it was left.

So, do I message to ask if he’s still free tomorrow? Is that desperate? I don’t want anything other than a night of fun- I’m moving abroad next year (which I discussed with him in our texts on Friday as he has worked in the country I’m moving to) so not looking for anything serious, but equally I don’t want to seem desperate and if him not following up with a time/place is a message?

OP posts:
Suprima · 19/08/2021 13:47

@KnickersInADrawer

Ok, perfect! I just wanted confirmation and know mumsnwt is normally anti-chasing the man so I wanted assurance that I am not chasing him. So what do I say in the message? I will tomorrow lunchtime. Hopefully my knickers end up in a drawer like my username (or on the floor) Grin
I’m anti-man chasing if you want a relationship with someone who is dynamic and takes an active role in your relationship

However you just want a shag, so it doesn’t really matter

peardropsonarainyday · 19/08/2021 13:52

I don't know op I think there's something dodgy about him . He's putting me off .

user1493494961 · 19/08/2021 14:10

He's probably got to confirm arrangements with his mate

KnickersInADrawer · 19/08/2021 14:25

He just asked what time I’m free from and am j staying in the centre of his city… I think it’s on!

OP posts:
Deedee121 · 19/08/2021 14:44

Ooh placemarking

KnickersInADrawer · 19/08/2021 14:50

I said the time I’m free from and he said ‘ok- I’m in a meeting until X time then hopefully free if you’d like to have a drink or two?’
I mean, is he keen to see me or not lol? I feel like I’m harassing him!

OP posts:
snzow · 19/08/2021 14:52

He maybe doesn't want to assume you're up for something casual.

He invited you for a drink and you said yea so maybe he thinks that's what you want?

If it's a ONS and you're moving away I'd be blatant

Karwomannghia · 19/08/2021 14:54

Just say sure where shall we meet?

lyntheyresexpeople · 19/08/2021 15:20

Just say yes sure, give me a time and a place

KnickersInADrawer · 19/08/2021 15:33

I think he knows it’s something casual- on that night I had far too much to drink and discussed past conquests with my friend because Mr Y asked why I don’t have a boyfriend. So in the drunk context I laughed with my friend about being bored by relationships etc.
I replied saying yes sounds good, a drink will be welcome.
I really hope he does give a time and place!

OP posts:
Flyinggeese1 · 19/08/2021 16:00

He will! Have a good night.

TSSDNCOP · 19/08/2021 16:19

Goodness, I think we passed desperate some time ago and ha careered on two wheels and a door handle into gagging for it Wink

Lovelybottom · 19/08/2021 19:02

Hmmm just caught up I would have been irritated by his vagueness about plans. I hope you're out with or without him OP and having a good time.

If you're not, I'd put my phone away now and not be hanging around waiting for him to confirm if he's meeting you. I was a fan of casual funtimes myself but they had to be keen, I was nobody's backup plan.

HeReWeGoAgAiN1112 · 19/08/2021 19:24

Hope you are having fun OP!

Northernsoullover · 19/08/2021 19:30

I'm so invested in this. I remember the anticipation of nights like this. I am middle aged and encumbered with sprogs so it's all a dim and distant memory.

KnickersInADrawer · 19/08/2021 19:53

So it’s agreed…. Meeting at 9:15 at a bar. I think 9:15 makes it clear it’s a booty call?! Love it Grin

OP posts:
KnickersInADrawer · 19/08/2021 19:53

Currently drinking a Prosecco and freshening up my makeup! Very excited

OP posts:
Lovelybottom · 19/08/2021 19:56

Woohoo it's on, enjoy OP

wizzywig · 19/08/2021 19:59

Damn I'm reliving my single days through you op.

shivermetimbers77 · 19/08/2021 20:00

Have fun OP!

Cleverpolly3 · 19/08/2021 20:01

Hope you still fancy him Grin

Oldtiredfedup · 19/08/2021 20:02

Enjoy yourself!!!!!

Myotherusernamewastakenagain · 19/08/2021 20:09

Woohoo, have fun!

Sleepyquest · 19/08/2021 20:12

Have fun! Grin

Earlydancing · 19/08/2021 20:14

I'm so excited. I'm sat here in tatty old pj's marking exam papers. I'm on a diet and I'm not drinking. At the moment you are the only exciting thing in my life. Enjoy it for me!!

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