AIBU. Told partner I don’t like .... (explicit)

[lifecanbelovely]

Not sure if it’s too early for this post but here’s a warning of explicit content.
I recently told my BF of 18 months who is one of the most attentive and selfless lovers, that I don’t like giving BJs. I think I may have ruined our sex life. Have I screwed up? Am I being unreasonable?

Thanks loads for your comments Deathgrip.
I really appreciate you pov.
My BF and I have spoken since I posted. I actually told him I posted on here about the subject to sense check whether I was being selfish or out of order.
We love our sex life. No one has satisfied me more than he, not even near.
I am open and willing to do and try so many things with him. And I’ve since felt I wanted to do a BJ. It won’t be the last.
He’s fine with it. We love each other very much and my raining the subject and come from a position of honesty.
Something I didn’t have nearly enough of in my 28 year relationship with my husband.
Of it were a deal breaker and it was the only thing he enjoyed, I would do it and work together or make it equally as great for both of us.
It’s interesting that a BJ can raise such strong opinions though

I really enjoy giving blow jobs. I love turning him on this way, and it tastes fine to me! I use a mixture of hands and mouth to avoid the dreaded jaw ache.

Thankfully, he loves giving as much as I do .

OP, your sex life sounds varied enough, I don’t think you have anything to worry about.

Actually, I think it's quite important to say that it is all right to dump a 'nice' partner who doesn't like what you like, sexually. Women in particular are very much encouraged to value a man who is kind, solvent, does his share of housework etc (not that these are not good things, of course) and... put up with it if he's not exactly dynamite in bed.

It's 100% OK to value sexual pleasure over marriage, children and conformity if that's what matters to you. Not everyone wants a long term relationship. Not everyone thinks a long term relationship is worth more than stuff that matters more to them and that's OK.

Sounds like you're doing a good job with him, especially from the second post. The concept of having something you only do if you're really in the mood, kinda makes them more special when they happen, and the fact that you did them early on in your relationship probably means that new relationship excitement helped you be in the mood for them. From what you said in post 2 it's not like things will get stale or dull when you're not in the mood for them either.

• I don't think anyone really enjoys giving blow jobs.

I do it because I know how much DP loves it, and in return I get something I love too.
Sometimes sex is about giving as well as only doing / getting what you enjoy most.

I would feel rejected if DP said he'd never go down on me, ever. I'm sure he doesn't love doing it as such but he gives it because he loves me. It's not surprising if your DH is a feeling a bit rejected.*

Well, I guess that depends. DP says she loves giving me BJs as she loves to see me writhing around, totally invested in the moment, and my unconditional trust in her. For someone who was forced to suck a penis this is difficult to an extent I cannot put into words. To give up total control to her makes her feel happy, loved and proud.

I adore going down on her. Her pleasure is my pleasure, and I will spend however long she needs satisfying her in every way. I've studied female anatomy and read various books. To feel her respond to my every touch is a jolt of immense happiness, but on a higher level. To simply be there, in the moment, is one of the greatest emotions I have ever felt. Her orgasms cause inexplicable joined pleasure in us both. It's a major fibre in our bond. An integral part of our relationship. Her pleasure is my pleasure.

Oops, a bit OT. But yeah :)

I am a woman and i love giving my partner a bj...funnily enough im not keen on him going down on me....i guess we all have our likes and dislikes...

I wish posters would stop speaking for all of womankind- it really grinds my gears. I love giving BJs and I’m pretty good at it judging by the response I’ve had. I also enjoy having my partner go down on me if he’s skilled at it. For me they’re pretty key elements to sex and I would really miss both if my partner wasn’t into them. ( although I’ve never met a man not into either). But that’s purely in regards me and my sexual relationships.

@Divebar. Exactly.