... in worrying that my DP may be gay?

[Mellodrama]

8 months into new relationship - He has 2 kids from previous marriage (he was with her for 17 years, nobody before or since)...

First time we met (online), my first reaction was to his voice - very feminine.

I like kissing - he doesn't seem to like it as much...

Though our sex life is actually really great, he cannot ejaculate ... THIS is what worries me - he has only on a number of occasions, using the same particular position and only when very rough (sorry TMA )

He seems pretty obsessed with anal sex ... Is this an indicator??

He is great but never seems to be 'all over me' even though he discusses future plans with me in them...

I'm really confused

My first thought is might he be on antidepressants? Some can make it difficult to achieve orgasm, and he may need the additional stimulation of anal/rough sex?

None of what you have suggested is an indicator of a man being gay. A lot of men like anal sex, my DH even likes being pegged. He isn't gay........

Some men take a long time to come, and some will suffer from premature ejaculation. That's the way of things. He likes rough sex! So what? I like it rough....

My advice would be to talk to him. Being open about sex in a relationship is always best. Ignore the frigid LTB mumsnet nuts.....

Fluoxetine killed my sex drive. It likely is that that's making it harder for him. Rough sex every once in a while fine, but a relationship based purely on that? Sounds a bit unloving. Just me though, OP.

He's not gay because he likes anal. That's crazy. You do understand being gay is a wider thing than just anal sex right? It's about being physically attracted to the same gender, and all that entails. And not attracted to the opposite gender. It's not simply lkining anal.

I'm struggling to believe anyone actually asked that question.

See Op, there are women queuing up for guys who can't come except through rough anal sex and won't kiss.

He'll be fine.

There's only one way to find out for sure, stick Steps on and see if he starts doing the Tragedy dance moves

It's simply too much porn. He's totally desensitised and it's in his mind as well as his penis. The only real way to deal with it is to stop using porn for a good while...but if it's become an addiction/compulsion he'll probably resist. Do a bit of research about porn addiction and then decide what's best for both of you to do :-)

There's only one way to find out for sure, stick Steps on and see if he starts doing the Tragedy dance moves

Or ask him about kylie’s pregnancy. If he assumes minogue he’s gay.

Hallo all,

We're just going to move this thread over to the sex topic.

Sounds to me like he is addled by watching too much porn.