Leaving private school for state 6th form - experiences?

[WomensRightsRenegade]

I did ask this once before but it was quite a while ago now so I was just wondering if this was something more people were doing/ thinking about doing?

Thanks to the VAT increase my son had his bursary halved (from 100pc) and it looks like it’s about to be reduced further or removed. I guess they have no need to rush confirmation seeing as they will know parents will do almost anything to avoid moving schools for year 11. It’s all been quite nasty really. Seeing behind the gloss and the taglines about how they care for the boys like family has been illuminating.

Anyhow DS is utterly heartbroken at having to leave when he is so happy. He is very talented musically and was so looking forward to continuing in the ensembles and taking Music A level there. It’s going to be an agonising last year as he can’t even let anyone know he’s leaving until April. No local sixth forms to us even offer Music A level and the nearest college is a lottery system.

Are other people facing having to remove kids against the child’s will? I am so worried he will always think we could have found a way, even though he’s said nothing to us except that he understands the situation totally. Academically I’m sure he’ll be fine if he works hard, but socially and musically it feels like it could be a very abrupt end. If I could go back in time I would never EVER have accepted the bursary. This was always the risk.

I don’t know where you live but in London loads move to state sixth form from private schools and have always done so. Probably more will do so going forward.
Having said that, it’s pretty bad of your school to cut the bursary in half. Both my DCs schools have prioritised existing bursary students over offering new ones due to VAT etc ( but they are both big schools with fairly healthy bursary pots).

It's pretty common amongst my colleagues to move their kids. They feel that private school A Level students are penalised over state school kids for University entry. Apparently Edinburgh didn't take any private school Scottish students for law last year. Only state. And lots of other Russell Group unis prioritising state kids.

If he has an interest in music then I'd suggest ABRSM grades and playing in bands over A-Level.

You absolutely have my sympathy - it’s the shit. Are there really no 6th forms that offer music anywhere in your area?! Or even slightly further that offer accommodation/boarding? (a couple of state boarding options in our neck of the woods - had no idea it existed till we came here!).

Mine moved but it was through choice and not for financial reasons, just felt it was time to move to a bigger setting with fewer rules (uniform etc). Just as well as the school closed down shortly after. Have you had a really good look at the local colleges? Where we are there are some excellent ones including for performing arts. My DC has loved college.

C’mon. Agonising? Heartbreaking? He’ll be fine. State sixth forms aren’t Columbian drug dens. He may even build some resilience? He can continue his music in and/or out of sixth form. He’ll be fine, if his parents don’t regard this change back into how 93% of the school populace advance through further education as a catastrophe.

Thanks for all responses. Sadly from DS’s highly selective boys’ school very few leave after year 11, and those we know that have done so have moved to specialist football training or suchlike. It’s been a hugely positive and exciting thing in most cases.

Re music DS has already taken his ABRSM grades and plays in countless ensembles at school. (One outside school has just disbanded, sadly). He’s actually pretty pivotal in the music department and close to irreplaceable in the near future due to the instruments he plays so I held the delusion that they would be keener to keep him. Wrong!!

He is academic too, and wants to do maths, further maths and physics alongside music, so a specialist music college wouldn’t really fit.

It’s all a mess at the moment. He’s hurting and we’re hurting so much for him. Very angry at the school too, but can never express it as then we would be labelled ‘difficult parents’ on top of everything else and I would hate that. And we have zero leverage. Best to be quietly disappeared, as intended. Hopefully we’ll look back on this time and realise it was only a minor blip.

I find it very hard to believe that there is no option for music at any local setting. We're in a rural backwater and yet all 3 of the nearest settings (one a school 6th form, one a 6th form college, one a college) offer music A-Level or equivalent.

Whereabouts do you live OP? Maybe people might have suggestions?

No personal experience, but if music is his thing, would he get a scholarship somewhere else? My DC’s friend moved from a normal state comp to board at Purcell for 6th form and gets most fees paid through their bursaries. I know they are doing other A-Levels as well as music there: https://www.purcell-school.org/admissions/fees/

Also consider Chetham’s in Manchester. They have a very good record of supporting academics alongside music. And can provide small classes and support for those who excel in maths

OP, just brush off the snide remarks from independent school critics.

Would you consider looking into and reaching out to sixth forms at other independent schools within commuting distance, those further away, or even boarding schools that may provide scholarships?

Finding state schools and colleges that offer both A-level music and active music ensembles can be quite challenging. However, there should be options within commuting distance that provide A-level music and maintain active ensembles with sufficient student participation. For state sixth form schools or colleges, it’s best to check their official websites and reach out to them directly to discuss your son's situation and see if any can meet his needs.

Sure MNs will help if you state the area for education? Very hard to get useful info without relevant data.

Sympathies OP, sounds truly horrible.

Have you talked to the head directly, face to face? It seems a little odd that they would happily lose someone so pivotal to the school.

Agree. OP, go and see the Headteacher. The whole thing seems very odd - to halve a bursary when presumably your own financial circumstances have not changed us peculiar. Blaming it on the VAT thing is a cop out from the school.

It sounds like the school are treating you appallingly. I wouldn’t worry about not wanting to be labelled difficult.

Is there any scope to negotiate no further bursary reductions, and then covering the difference with loans/ gifts from gps / your siblings etc? It sounds like your son has talent.

Whereabouts are you OP? My DC are at a state school with an excellent music department, so they do exist.

Most sixth form colleges have music. Why should he go quietly? Not having fees that are most people’s income is hardly a crime.

Sorry I have not read the entire thread but could you consider applying to Christ’s Hospital? They have an incredible music department and still offer very generous bursaries for day and boarding children.
Good luck.

Lots of DC seem to move to state school after GCSEs for financial and other reasons. Most seem to tell their friends/classmates why and have stayed in touch with friends etc.

You could investigate day or boarding options with large bursaries, but imagine there are few at 100% or close to it. You and DS could seek the best state option - that might mean a long commute or moving house - and music ensembles .

It’s hard for a kid to have to move school when they’re happy. However, it’s also not the end of the world and the bottom line is that if you can’t afford it, he needs to understand that. It’s a life lesson. We don’t always get what we want. My older kids both went to state sixth form, one of them for financial reasons (had to leave private school), and they enjoyed it and both went to RG universities afterwards. They met a wide range of new friends from different social backgrounds and I think that has opened up their views of the world in a way that mixing with only their private school friends wouldn’t have done.

Your thoughts that the school have been ‘nasty’ to reduce the bursary and that you now regret choosing private education due to it being reduced may or may not be well grounded (I don’t know much about private schools’ different bursary values and criteria), but seem unlikely to help you to help DS now.

Looking at it another way, DS will have had 5 years of low cost private education, aiding his GCSEs and high level music and he enjoyed it. He starts from a strong position going into 16-19 education and beyond. You and he have time to investigate and choose from his options.

Sounds a difficult situation all round. Your DS sounds amazing. We are pretty rural and have little choice in terms of sixth forms. Would he be eligible for a bursary elsewhere and would he board for sixth form?

My friend’s son got a full boarding scholarship to Chets for A level - try them

The more I think about this the weirder it sounds. Absolutely not wanting to touch on the VAT thing-but I just can’t see a school losing a pivotal member of the 6th form like this. Apart from anything else, it’s just such bad PR-when making it possible for him to stay would look so good for them. Is there a misunderstanding somewhere? You really must talk to the Head. And the Head of music-does he know what’s going on?

If it’s that important, why aren’t you taking out a loan or such like? It’s only for 2 years.

Whereabouts in the country are you? There are loads of good music opportunities most places for good youth musicians, you just have to hunt for them. There’s the JDs and local music hubs, and by the time they get to A level, you see a few of them popping up in the local symphonias or philharmonic orchestras.