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Secondary education

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Original poster

Leaving private school for state 6th form - experiences?

316 replies

WomensRightsRenegade · 20/07/2025 20:47

I did ask this once before but it was quite a while ago now so I was just wondering if this was something more people were doing/ thinking about doing?

Thanks to the VAT increase my son had his bursary halved (from 100pc) and it looks like it’s about to be reduced further or removed. I guess they have no need to rush confirmation seeing as they will know parents will do almost anything to avoid moving schools for year 11. It’s all been quite nasty really. Seeing behind the gloss and the taglines about how they care for the boys like family has been illuminating.

Anyhow DS is utterly heartbroken at having to leave when he is so happy. He is very talented musically and was so looking forward to continuing in the ensembles and taking Music A level there. It’s going to be an agonising last year as he can’t even let anyone know he’s leaving until April. No local sixth forms to us even offer Music A level and the nearest college is a lottery system.

Are other people facing having to remove kids against the child’s will? I am so worried he will always think we could have found a way, even though he’s said nothing to us except that he understands the situation totally. Academically I’m sure he’ll be fine if he works hard, but socially and musically it feels like it could be a very abrupt end. If I could go back in time I would never EVER have accepted the bursary. This was always the risk.

OP posts:
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Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:48

Octavia64 · 21/07/2025 11:43

If you are prepared to post the instrument(s) and roughly where you are in the country I’m sure people can suggest ensembles.

i’m sorry he is having to leave. It does sound very difficult.

as the college is lottery you might as well apply and then if he gets it it’s a bonus.

Thank you so much. Yes, possible ways forward are coming into focus as the shock lessens a bit. There are definitely possible options. The grammar will require an academic reference in the autumn so I guess us planning to leave will be pretty apparent. They can start edging him out of the ensembles early! Maybe he can even train his successor…

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Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:50

senua · 21/07/2025 08:53

He is academic too, and wants to do maths, further maths and physics alongside music
What is the long-term plan? I get that he loves his music but if his career is going to be the maths/physics route then he needs to major on that.
It's hard but it's part of growing up and being an adult: knowing that you can have it / do it all, and that you need to prioritise.

Music can be very time-consuming. In sixth form will it be time well-spent, or should he be concentrating on his academics and making new friends in his new setting?

Yes you’re right. Unless he’s going to do music at uni then the focus needs to be more on STEM. Although he does hanker after the Tonmeister degree, which requires music, maths and physics! Am hoping either way we can find opportunities for music outside school.

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Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:52

CurlewKate · 21/07/2025 09:10

Incidentally- the people who move their kids from private to state to try to game the system? Morally questionaable-and Universities are on to you. @WomensRightsRenegade are you still around? If so-would you be prepared to say where in the country you are? There are state schools that tick your boxes, but no use naming them if they are a million miles away
from you.

Outer London. I have to admit I haven’t looked at places much further out but maybe he can travel

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GleefulGiraffe · 21/07/2025 11:52

As well as National Youth Orchestra, Opera North also has a youth orchestra if that's more your area of the country. There are definitely lots of options out there for continuing the music. I know several state educated kids who are doing brilliant musical things without a school orchestra. Brass bands if he plays a brass instrument are definitely something to look at.

Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:54

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/07/2025 08:52

Have you had meetings with the head teacher and bursar and been told 100% that they will not continue to support him? That seems off if he really is so exceptional and pivotal to the music for.

He could do his A level choices at our state school in South Wales, however it’s a Welsh medium comp! I really don’t think it’s unusual for these courses to be offered. Have you looked into all of your local options? Some of my friends’ kids are leaving private at sixth form simply because the private school is too small to offer the range of courses that local
schools and colleges do. Many places need applications in fairly early (before Christmas) so you really do need to get onto this. For alternative music, especially high level ensembles, have a look at what your local county music service offer. You might be surprised - there are plenty of talented musicians who your DS won’t have had the opportunity to play with if he’s just been in school ensembles so far.

What @JustMarriedBecca says about universities isn’t quite right. Many, but definitely not all, offer contextual offers but they’re certainly not just based on where pupils have taken their A levels.

Requests to speak to the bursar have been ignored and I doubt the Head would speak to us about it at this point. Have been told the decision is final

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Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:55

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 21/07/2025 09:32

You must live in a particularly poor place for state provision if there’s no state A level music option in commutable distance from your home. Roughly where in the country are you? Do you have family who live nearer to a decent 6th form who’d be happy to have DS move in for term time? Could you move? It’s very unusual to not offer music A level in this county (for those offering A levels, not all do).

If you can’t afford private you can’t afford it, but don’t give up on music A level if that’s his strongest subject.

To be fair we haven’t looked at places with a long commute. We are in a bit of a black spot despite not being far from London. But probably time to look at places further out.

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Original poster
WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:56

Octavia64 · 21/07/2025 10:37

A level music is generally a nice to have rather than a requirement.

if your son is looking at a performance degree in music (ram or similar) it’s pretty much by audition.
academic music degrees also do not necessarily require it.

depending on what instrument he plays there will be ensembles available through the county music service - most offer multiple orchestras and wind bands or similars,

if he plays a brass instrument or percussion there are many many brass bands in the country that would welcome him with open arms - we’ve just recruited a couple of 16 year olds to ours.

if he’s a singer then church/cathedral choirs are always looking for men as are frankly any other choir.

there’s also summer and Easter residentials for most instruments - my DD did national youth choir (singing) who have summer and Easter courses (you need to audition) there’s also national youth orchestra, national youth brass band etc. both my kids did this type of thing and they really enjoyed it and it really developed them as musicians.

(it also convinced one of them she never wanted to be a professional musician as it was way too hard work!!)

music is actually one of the things you really can pursue to a very very high level outside school.

focus on getting him into a good place to do the maths, FM and physics and look for music opportunities outside school. There will be many.

This is incredibly helpful, thank you

OP posts:
Mirabai · 21/07/2025 11:58

WomensRightsRenegade · 21/07/2025 11:52

Outer London. I have to admit I haven’t looked at places much further out but maybe he can travel

Show quote history

Oh well if you’re in Outer London there are loads of youth orchestras around, even the National and there will be loads of teachers who can teach in music A Level outside school. I can put you in touch. He can also do music college on Saturdays.

I thought you just be in the deepest countryside somewhere.

cwmflahwbml · 21/07/2025 11:58

Does he want to study music at university?
If he doesn't, he doesn't need to do A-level music.
Even if he does decide he wants to study music there might be some places he could study without doing A-level music if he has ABRSM grades (including theory). Has he done grade 8 theory? Or some places might offer a foundation year? I'm out of the loop as I've been out of the UK for a long time now.

It's a shame he will miss out on the school music opportunities but see this as a way for him to discover new opportunities outside of school in the wider music community in the local area.
I did A-levels in science and didn't want to study music but I was very good in two instruments. By the time I got to sixth form I was bored with the opportunities on offer in school. I wanted to play more advanced repertoire with people who were better than me so I could learn from them. A friend got me involved in theatre productions at the local university and I loved that (and ended up doing it for years even though I had another career at that point). I also played in local churches and community orchestras. It did me the world of good to learn from older, more experienced players.
I went to university and studied chemistry. I had a fantastic musical life there. I was in the university orchestra which was ca. 95% music students. We played all kinds of challenging repertoire. I had my own string quartet and we did various gigs and made a decent amount of money which is always helpful at uni. I continued to play in churches and also in the orchestra pit for various theatrical productions.

Through various twists and turns I have ended up as a freelance musician and church organist. No A-level music and a chemistry degree!!

That's a lot about me, but I hope you can see that all is not lost if he goes somewhere else and can't do A-level music or if there aren't the opportunities for him within the school. Concentrate on finding a good state school for the Maths and Physics and then look outside of the school for musical opportunities.

twistyizzy · 21/07/2025 11:58

hellowembley · 21/07/2025 08:43

After 5 years of private school for free, you could find a way to pay for the final two! The school aren’t being ‘nasty’ if they can’t afford bursaries any more

So because you can afford X, you can afford Y?
By that logic, if you can afford £150k for a house then you can afford £300k for a house.
1000s of parents are being priced out due to VAT, that should come as a shock to no-one yet seemingly it does 🙄

NormaMajors1992coat · 21/07/2025 11:59

NB you’re right that he would need music for the Tonmeister course though (and a plan B as it’s quite competitive!)

RandomMess · 21/07/2025 12:00

What about boarding at Christs Hospital, ticks the music box and everyone pays means tested fees and the criteria is very transparent as to what you would have to pay?

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 21/07/2025 12:06

Which direction from London? Would Kent grammars be an option? They tend to have very large areas they accept students from if he can get good grades at GCSE.

Baninarama · 21/07/2025 12:08

Find a music teacher that can teach him the ARSM diploma for post-grade 8. It's University level and is well looked upon. Also gives extra UCAS points, should he need them.

Baninarama · 21/07/2025 12:09

Also, IB courses contain a music element - it may be worth looking at colleges that offer this.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/07/2025 12:09

Does he know what he’s interested in at university? Be aware that if he drops music at A level, and just does maths, FM and physics some universities see that as a very narrow range of A levels and it could restrict his choice of degree courses. LSE is one example.

Floofle · 21/07/2025 12:17

Hi OP, do you know of Christ's Hospital? It's a boarding school and they do lots of burseries etc?

Also if he likes Maths and Music and Physics, then consider Acoustics!

IleftmybaginNewportPagnell · 21/07/2025 12:18

Sorry if this has been mentioned but Farnborough 6th Form College (Hampshire) has long had a great reputation for music, if your that direction out of London. Feel your pain but, as other posters have mentioned, you have given him a fantastic grounding.

NewsdeskJC · 21/07/2025 12:20

I think as he is a talented musician he will be fine.
My nephew had a similar mix. Didn't do Music Alevel in lower sixth and thought he would follow maths/engineering route.
Literally during the summer hols realised that music was what he wanted. He taught himself the A level content and passed it with the highest grade, whilst at the same time auditioning for various unis. So I really don't think it's the show stopper you think.
Maybe he can reframe it as he has had some amazing opportunities to progress his musical education, the next bit is more about him and his determination?

Octavia64 · 21/07/2025 12:21

Ok, well finding opportunities in outer London:

if he’s a brass/percussionist you can find a brass band here. These are ranked by sections as they compete - championship bands play the toughest music down to fourth section bands which are generally around grade 5 ish. Players in championship bands are generally at professional level.

https://www.bbe.org.uk/find-a-band?current_employer=&instrument_vacancy_type_57=All&national_area_31=1&items_per_page=12

if he plays an orchestral instrument there are various amateur orchestras in and around London that will be playing at a much higher standard than school ones, you can use this site to find them. They vary in their requirements - some will want auditions, most will want a minimum of grade 5/grade 8 playing level.

https://amateurorchestras.org.uk/olondon.htm

either of these options will really push him on.

as I said, we have a couple of 16 year olds just joined my band - we play at about third section level so about grade 8 sort of level but we have about 60 pieces of music in the repertoire at any given time so although the level isn’t particularly high the sheer volume is quite a challenge!

Hoppinggreen · 21/07/2025 12:24

My DC's private school doesn't have a 6th form so its a non decision
BUT both my DC said that they probably would have opted to go to the excellent 6th form college locally anyway. They both enjoyed school but felt ready to do something different and DD (and hopefully DS soon) really enjoyed the very diffferent atmosphere and overall learning style - much more like Uni than school.
It was a really good grounding for DD for Uni as well, some friends who were at Private from 3-18 struggles at Uni and had to learn how to study in a different way

MidnightMusing5 · 21/07/2025 12:41

JustMarriedBecca · 20/07/2025 23:26

It's pretty common amongst my colleagues to move their kids. They feel that private school A Level students are penalised over state school kids for University entry. Apparently Edinburgh didn't take any private school Scottish students for law last year. Only state. And lots of other Russell Group unis prioritising state kids.

If he has an interest in music then I'd suggest ABRSM grades and playing in bands over A-Level.

I would second this. It seems it’s “easier entry” for state school students vs private, from what I’ve seen personally

Araminta1003 · 21/07/2025 12:59

Can you access Kings Maths School on public transport if you are Outer London? There may be lots of like minded DC there and he might like the idea of something like that.

Araminta1003 · 21/07/2025 13:05

One of the high achieving local private schools in London close to us actually offers state school kids full access to after school chamber groups and the most senior orchestra by audition and subsidises the transport there (if need be). If you know your local area well and tune in to the other parents with musical kids, you may find lots of opportunities like this. There are so so many in and around London, and most of the talented kids go to the Royal Academy of Music or the Royal College of Music on a Saturday anyway and get quite fed up of having to play in their school symphony orchestra anyway.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 21/07/2025 13:22

MidnightMusing5 · 21/07/2025 12:41

I would second this. It seems it’s “easier entry” for state school students vs private, from what I’ve seen personally

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What have you seen personally? What makes it easier to get into university for state school pupils? Is there anything over and above the contextual offers that vary between different universities?

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