Year 11 - 2024/2025: Half way, half baked, half term!

[QueenMabby]

Continuation of the year 11 support thread. Go!

I’m so sorry to hear that about your DD. How did her day pan out? Did she manage to get anything done?

I know how you feel and I admit I really don’t know what to do. Lackadaisical, is that the word? My DS just looks utterly disinterested and without a care in the world, like nothing really is happening.. He also looks exhausted and I fear he is masking ( he is ND- ASD/ ADHD), and his way of dealing can be to stick his head in the sand and pretend it’s not happening…

I hope your DD managed to get up in a more motivational mood, and she is getting back in the saddle. 🤞🤞🤞.

I honestly think it was Horrible Histories that got DS so interested in History! If it hadn't already been invented then he would absolutely have done so himself 🤩

Glad your oxygen mask is well and truly installed.

His momentum crashed tonight a d he didn't do any flashcards but DH said they are almost done so will do them at the weekend. It has to be done in the evening midweek as he likes to do them with DH. So they are watching the football instead

@INeverSeeYou
I have this. I've shown an interest is @NotDonna dd taking Russian and Germany history because this is my love, BA and MA, but my ds1, and then ds2 on this thread showed no interest in History , chose Geography, and didnt even like that much, so I have no one to discuss my passions with!

@Oblomov25 ha ha! She still hasn’t wiped off Germany. DD2 did history A level and a module was Russia - weirdly (and quite disconcertingly) she thought young Stalin looked like a ‘bit of a hottie’ 😮😮

Am so disappointed in DC, no revision done, and we are moving onto Thursday. Happy for them to have taken the weekend off but I've been busy with work and although we worked out a timetable they've just not engaged at all. Complete holiday mode & I'm not sure how to get through to them. Plus they now think I'm horrible as had a bit of a showdown. Bloody exams. Sigh.

It’s never ending! DC is doing his standard going though the motions but not very focused, still got mountains to do. 12 exams. I love the fact that until the bitter end I still believe he will pull all the stops out, no…

I helped him use chat GPT to do a CV today to start looking for summer jobs and that elicited more enthusiasm than I ever saw for GCSE study..sigh. 18 days to go!!! Hang on in there !

Lots of revision today, some French and lots of History, which is one of her favourite subjects. I’m reminding her to take breaks because she’s pretty diligent and I don’t want her to overdo it. She’s planning on revising for the science papers over the next few days using cgp books and ‘freesciencelessons’ on YouTube.

Back at it for dd today after 3 full days off for lovely orchestra things and a wonderful concert last night.

It’s starting to get to that time at just over half way through that the days on her revision planner are starting to look emptier as there are fewer and fewer exams to actually revise for - I’m trying not to let that freak me out! 3 exams next week - Latin (poetry), maths and history.

At DD’s school they do the random history combination of Elizabeth, the History of Medicine, Russia and the American West!

Elizabeth & American West? Never heard of pm that combo before. Interesting though. I hated history at school but all DCs history topics over the years have been fascinating - I think it’s probably well taught & engaging at their school.

Ahh @somethinggoodisgonnahappen that’s hard! Hopefully the ‘showdown’ results in some effort 🤞🏼🤞🏼 I hate that though as always feel bloody guilty afterwards. Even if they’re being the ones being totally unreasonable. Grrr

That is a random combination. Interesting though.

4 exams for us next week, Maths, History, French and English language. I can’t wait for them to be over.

Am also hoping there will be a sudden flurry of revision @Hollyhedge DC has always managed their schoolwork well previously and predicted good results but I just can’t see that happening with such minimal effort. Cramming the night before just won’t cut it!

@ExamStuff i wish I’d been able to write your post. I don’t understand why my DC seems so laid back! I’ve got friends with DCs who want to do medicine etc & they are just beavering away and I know DC won’t be able to compete.

@NotDonna exactly I feel like the bad guy but it’s for their benefit not mine!

We’re in the same boat. DS was always high flier until about a year ago, just been a bit disengaged or something. No sense of urgency. Not sure if he just cba or was complacent. We can’t do much now, as I said to him the other day he has another chance to shine in sixth form (IF he wants to…)I hope what he has done/ my cajoling will get him over the requirements line

Dc is also doing an odd combination for history: crime and punishment for the theme across time, kings Richard and John, superpowers/the Cold War and then USA 1950something to 1960something.

The Richard and John bit seems to be an obscure choice- very few online resources for that bit as is seems most schools do Anglo-Saxons or Elizabeth.

He’s still to start the USA- paper 3, revision.

He did a maths paper yesterday after a few hours of history. I struggle to mark it as often his working is different to the working laid out in the mark scheme. He seems to show his working, and usually gets the right answer… but it doesn’t always match up to their mark scheme eg 1 mark for this bit, one mark for that bit, 1 mark for the answer … well he hasn’t got that bit, but he’s got the right answer… And I’m crap at maths so I can’t tell if it’s another way of writing the same thing/equally valid for working out marks. Argh! Going to get DH to have a look at it. Hopefully his A at A level vs my C at gcse will mean it makes sense!

It's interesting how involved we parents on this thread are.

I don't want to out DC's BFF's delightful family but they have made a number of commitments which mean their DC aren't expected to revise during this period.

They are successful and fun so I guess it's worked for them.

@Sunnyafternooning would DS mark it himself and then see where he’s going wrong (if he is)?

It’s an interesting point @INeverSeeYou .

My mum has been polite but has generally made comments about spoon feeding and over involved parents…

When I went through GCSEs many moons ago they were completely hands off. But with hindsight, too hands off. It wasn’t that they didn’t value education. They absolutely did, they paid for private schooling and had high expectations. However, they expected me at 16 to achieve it entirely by myself/from input at school. Despite being a SAHM, and so around during my study leave, she let me get on with it completely alone… and I just didn’t. I looked over books the night before exams, and maybe a few times in the run up, I think. I certainly don’t remember doing anything like the level of revision that is required now.

It’s very lucky that the GCSEs weren’t so content heavy then, truth be told. My results were ‘fine’ but not spectacular. Mainly Bs, the odd A and an A* in my favourite subject and a C in my worst. I don’t think it would be possible to get those results now with such minimal revision, unless you were a bit of a genius - which I wasn’t!

It's interesting how involved we parents on this thread are.

@INeverSeeYouI've been surprised at the level of commitment. I will help with a revision timetable and arranging fun stuff in breaks, but not the actual content of revision or sitting next to them whilst they do it. My DD wouldn't let me, and DS2's stuff is beyond me, likewise DS1 when he did his A levels. But I'll get them hot chocolates and organise a walk! Plus I do love the post paper analysis, more so than the kids themselves 😂.

Just one exam here next week for DD2 (maths) but she knows that she's got to get on with it for the sciences and music so I'm encouraging that. Helps that DD1 is finally in full A-Level mode too so revision is happening. Doesn't help that both are doing Biology and DD1 is particularly scathing of the combined science GCSE course... 'none of this is actually true..it's very basic'.

Siblings...

There was some listening to music GCSE set texts yesterday which is a start I guess but I'll encourage some more active revision with that. If anyone has any good resources for the Edexcel course I'm all ears - even if DD2 isn't!

Happy half term all!
I’ve taken the rest of the week off as hols from work-am not entirely sure why-I probably thought it would be good to be around and encourage and provide food etc. In reality I am sitting here worrying about my own work piling up whilst DS is asleep and will be till at least 11.
Am going to the gym and seeing my pal tonight whose DD is also doing GCSE’s.
Is super interesting to read about everyone’s involvement-I would love to test and go through stuff with DS but he will not entertain it-he did last year on RS but not now.
Roll on the summer!

I’m not involved in the day to day revision either. Dd is terrifyingly self-motivated - far more than I could ever hope to be! I provide a sounding board if necessary and a taxi service and that’s about it.

@Sunnyafternooning you've made me think back to my own GCSEs/A levels and my parents didn’t get involved at all. My mum would give me a lift to school if I had an exam but that was all. I vaguely recall asking my dad to test me on some German vocab, which he did despite not having clue about any languages. I don’t think they didn’t want to help, but they had left school at 14 and not studied any of the subjects so couldn’t really help. All
my older siblings hadn’t really engage with school either so I was this strange academic child that they didn’t know what to do with. I certainly didn’t have all the study resources that DS has - I don’t recall having such easy access to past papers. I did do a lots of timed exam questions, especially for history A level, but these were questions our teacher made up and told us to use to practice writing enough and forming an argument. There certainly wasn’t a mark scheme to check if I was doing it right!

I’m in a totally different position to my parents though - a levels/degree/phd and work in HE -so DS knows I do know some stuff and I told him I’d help if he wanted me to. The only thing he asked for help with was history and that’s become our little ‘together project’. He’ll ask about a few biology topics sometimes too. But, otherwise he’s been very self sufficient. This is a good thing because he’s chosen A levels that are outside my sphere of capability so he’ll be on his own with those!

I suspect things could be quite different with DD when she sits her GCSES in 3 years time though. If her end of year exams were anything to go by she will need dragging to the desk and very close monitoring! I may have to pay DS to come home from uni to tutor her because I suspect I’ll lose patience with her (or vice versa). Fingers crossed she matures a bit across the next 3 years!

@Sunnyafternooning same here. My DM has made similar comments 'oh we didn't do ANY of that for any of you, we just let you get on with it'. Other than buying me a few flashcards she left me to it. Now I can see (and have been enlightened by this thread too) that we are all different, some DCs thrive on being left to it, but my parents like yours were too hands off for a teenager like me.

They also expected resilience and hard work. But like DS I have suspected inattentive ADHD so I was all over the place, like you I glazed over textbooks the night before and highlighted lots of 'stuff', all the things they advise against nowadays! I came out with 4 Cs and a B. I have done alright for myself since but I just wish I had some more support, not necessarily on course content but on structure of revision and sitting with me doing some Q&A. Helping me with flashcards - they bought them but I didn't know what to do with them, honestly, I spent more time sorting out my flashcard holder. This was late 80s so the school also just left us to it with no tips on how to revise.

I think I am subconsciously (or consciously) breaking generational curses!

Dentist (both). Hair cut (DS). Spontaneous trip to Nando's this evening (DS).
I think there's a good chunk of time in between to revise!

I think he could do more, but I remind myself that I'd much rather this than an anxious, non-sleeping, doom monger.

The 1/2 term has been a welcome break, but I think it's been a bit of a circuit breaker for many of them and they're struggling with the balance.

Back in my day (last year to do O levels), we had the language orals and science practicals before May 1/2 term and then the written exams after, and they were more condensed I think. We didn't have a day where there was only one 1hr exam for instance.

Presumably for many of us the level of involvement depends on how motivated the DC are, how much support they need/want, and how much we are actually able to help.

I've found it quite tricky to get the right level of offering support/encouragement without being too interfering.

I agree.
For DS, me just being around (and trying to be nice) seems to work best.