Year 11 - 2024/2025 - Support Thread - the final stretch

[QueenMabby]

A new thread to take is to exams and beyond! All welcome.

@stickygotstuck don’t send either email! Honestly, call the HoY and explain that DD won’t be coming in other than for exams due to MH issues. Tell them she’s struggling and that the ONLY way she’ll be able to sit the exams is if she revises at home. You may find them more receptive with a phone call than by email. If it’s still a ‘no’ then I’d insist. Her health is just too important.

@stickygotstuck and keep her home in the meantime.
I very stupidly kowtowed to school’s ridiculous notions when my eldest was ill. I stupidly believed they knew best. They didn’t; I did. My eldest suffered much more because of it. I wish I’d listened to her (and my gut at the time). Follow your instincts and push for what she needs. She doesn’t need to know or be involved if it’ll add to the anxiety. Good luck 🤞🏼

Agree 💯
Don't send her in

DC is practising Eng Lit questions and has complained that the teacher didn't make clear how much she should write for the poetry questions compared to the Mockingbird questions. I said it must depend on the number of marks but she is concerned that she will either write too little and lose marks, or waste time writing too much. I don't know why the teacher hasn't explained important details like this?

I never did Eng Lit so have zero idea.

Thanks @NotDonna . The other alternative is to simply not reply, as a taste of their own medicine.

DD is currently going to school 2-3 times a week. We just inform school that she is too unwell to attend. Which she is, but only because of the huge anxiety that school is causing.

I explained the whole shebang back in February to HoY, Pastoral, SENCo and Tutor (by email because I wanted them all to have the exact same info at the same time) and why study leave ASAP would be good. I got a patronising reply back from HoY basically saying 'I can see you've thought carefully about what's best for your child but I know best'. There aren't enough eye rolls🙄.

I don't care anymore about her attendance. It's just that I'd expect common sense and clarity from any school. I'd rather not have to judge DD's state of mind every morning and make a rushed decision every single day about whether she's well enough to go or whether her cortisol levels are going to end up killing her.

Essentially, DD s in charge of deciding when it's worth going in and when not. She is sensible and wants to do well, so we've decided to trust her on that. And here is the kicker - her tutor spoke to her and told her essentially that attending revision may help refresh her knowledge but she understood that it's her life and her exams, and she should do what she thinks best.

Her school seems to be split into teachers, who are mostly very good, and the SLT, who are mostly useless. Some of them are also teachers so I'm assuming their heads must be about to explode any minute now. It's actually quite sad.

Sorry for the long post. It's therapeutic to get it all out and to see that I'm not the one going mad!

Essentially, DD s in charge of deciding when it's worth going in and when not. She is sensible and wants to do well, so we've decided to trust her on that.

love this and couldn’t agree more.

@stickygotstuck definitely don’t reply. They won’t be expecting a reply anyway. Other than perhaps an argument. Sounds like you’ve got it sussed!

I meant to say, I'm so sorry your DD had to suffer because of the school's lack of understanding.

But you're right that trusting your instincts tends to be the correct course of action. I've taken my sweet time to finally own it but getting there. I guess the magic formula is instinct+experience, so please don't feel too bad.

Well, dds exam was this morning so first one down 😬
She did actually revise for this one, so I'm hoping it's gone okay!

DD2 did drama this morning and is now sitting English lang. Called me as predicted after the first one - seems to have been ok. Apparently she had 4 minutes left at the end and 'went over the words she didn't think were legible'!.

She is clearly a bit wobbly though as made me revise a whole load of nazi germany stuff with her on facetime just because she wanted to hang out with me. It's a good job I'm freelance.

Was drama aqa? That's the one dd sat this morning.

Pleased first one went well @minisnowballs and I’m actually impressed she’s said she’ll call you after each one! Makes that distance a little easier to manage.

@destiel00 hope drama went well!

@destiel00 yes drama AQA. All of drama done now. Hope it went well for yours - think it did help going into the first one knowing 60% already done.

I suspect she'll get bored of calling me - but not surprised she did this time. What made me laugh is that she said they were 'playing this weird old british music in the dining hall at breakfast which didn't go well with the GCSE stress'. They'd clearly gone big on VE Day, but perhaps it created a bit of a 'wartime atmosphere'

@minisnowballs
Yes, definitely. Dd got very good grades for her performance and coursework, so perhaps wasn't feeling quite so stressed about this one?
A good one to start with.
Hope your dds pm exam goes well x

@minisnowballs
🤣🤣
A chorus of "roll out the barrel" to go with breakfast!?

I have had to tell my DD today that obviously the most important subjects are the ones she has chosen for A levels, not the ones her friends want to revise with her. Sigh…

I’ve only just realised that DD2 only has 1.5 hours of lessons a week of each science subject. No wonder she’s very shaky on most of the content. Is this normal?

It is at dds school.
The kids doing triple have really struggled to get the curriculum finished in time.

I think it is normal. DS has the same number of lessons for maths and triple science. He is a little shaky on some science content but cramming now…

I just looked up science on ds’s timetable. He has 3 double lessons a week. A double lesson is hour and half. That’s for triple science.

I’ve just looked at DD’s timetable. She had 7 periods a fortnight for each science. A period is 40 mins so 280 mins a fortnight or just over 2 hours a week.

My friend last night commented that her dd sitting mainly igcse's at local Indy only has about 14 exams! My ds2 has about 14 before the May bank holiday, 11 after, total 25. In the 2 weeks pre end of May week off, then in the 2 or so weeks after. About 25 in 4 weeks.

I can't remember how many I sat 30+ years ago, but I'm sure I only sat roughly about 12 in about 2 and a half weeks. When did this all get so mental? Gove?

Yes.
Gove.

So Ds gets 4.5 hours a week. That’s a lot more than some. If I’ve got that correct. I’ll check with him.