Why do people openly criticise decisions to send your kids to a private school?

[scotmum1977]

I sent my Son to a private school (Glasgow) last year for various reasons and it's working out really well. There is the cost but we just do without expensive holidays etc. I can't think of a better gift for my children than a good education. I was so surprised at how offended people get when they ask which school he attends. They think it's ok to criticise you openly and make bitchy comments here and there. Surely how you spend your own money is your own business. Anyone else have this experience?

Honestly the issue is that state schools are so hugely under-resourced in the UK. If we had stayed in the US our local school was funded at 23,000 per pupil. Our local State school in the UK is funded at £5,000. It's a HUGE difference. We would have happily gone state in the US but have gone private. I'm buying quality of life for my kids. They happier less stressed teachers who have a lighter workload. I can completely understand why people who can't afford private in the UK would be upset. It's a massive funding difference and the experience is VERY different for the children. I'd happily pay more tax if to find state schools to an appropriate level. The putting of state vs private is missing the point of the massive lack of funds.

OP I'm with you and understand your frustration at the class warriors responsible for the divisions that tear our country apart and their wilful refusal to see that the choice to entrench your child in a life of privilege is exactly the same as choosing between a Ford and a Hyundai. Madness, I tell you, madness.

I think its a fair people do see it as a criticism of their use the state system but let's be realistic most don't have any choice school fees are way outside of their budget; few have £40K pa per child and after paying any taxes kicking around to spend on education.
But I don't criticise anyone and I certainly hurl unpleasant insults/gross and unfair generalisations at them and their children

Good point Hollyhaphazard. Also I don't think criticising individuals' choices is the way to change anything and particularly their chives relating to their children's well being. I am not a supporter of private education but I can't honestly say I wouldn't do it for my kids if I could. It should not be a much of an advantage as it is but it's the system that needs to change (school funding, university admissions policies, etc) not individuals.

"Both cities are great"
Im afraid I have to disagree with you there Glasgow wins hands down.

Flossietoot I'mnot surrounded by people in poverty. You can't generalise an entire £5m population by some stats on Wikipedia. Glasgow is s big area. Hahaha next you'll be telling me we eat deep fried mars bars for lunch! The people who are criticising my school choice are those who can also afford to send their kids to private school but choose not too. I certainly don't go around boasting about his schooling. I don't even mention it. Other people ask me abc I'm not going to lie about it.

*choices, not chives. My children don't relate well to chives at all.

I always love the class division comments on here. It’s such a middle class preoccupation.

Sue51 wow that is super expensive and twice as much as it costs where I live.

Ruffina lol absolutely.

"we eat deep fried mars bars for lunch!"
I've never eaten one in Glasgow or anywhere else for that matter and I know they are frequently served in take aways in Glasgow along with Ironbru (preferably before the sugar contents was reduced) but I'm reliably informed deep fried Mars bars that they're pretty good!

Most of the independents near me offer boarding and the few day schools are in competition with state grammar schools. The fees are rising way more than the cost of living.

Hulloa that's a pretty disgusting comment.

The best thing the UK would do is to impose a property tax paid annually somewhat like council tax but much higher like they do in the US. It taxes the rich and pays for education. We paid over 20k in property tax in the US every year but it was well worth it. It should be divided up evenly nationally though or you end up with areas with much high funding.

The State schools here are operating on a shoe string with huge classes. Yes maybe you can hurl every kid in 30 over some standardised testing hurdle but it's not good for them or the teachers. Fight for smaller more humane classes. Fight for more State funding and this whole issue goes away. Taking pot shots as those who use private education here is useless. But as a private school parent you just have to suck it up. You're in a position of privilege and that's hard for some to watch.

My dear, you have no idea. I was terrified.

Hulloa just now I was talking about insults and ridiculous unfounded generalisations and guess what.....

Right- well you are obviously in some kind of bubble if you aren’t aware of what is going on five minutes up the road from you. And I would love to know who all these friends are who can afford to send their kids private but haven’t bothered. Sending one child is almost manageable, but when I lived in Edinburgh, I didn’t know many who had the spare 24k per year after tax to send two kids, or 36k to send three. Wise up.

Inequality is not a middle class preoccupation. You talk as if it's a luxury to discuss it. We live in a country in which some people spend 40k per kid per year on education and others are meant to be grateful for their ten quid Christmas benefit bonus. We ought to be talking about it and the things that perpetuate it.

Hollyhfhazard you are right. Our education system is struggling and needs more funding. I would rather we had s better system and not have to pay for school. I'd welcome paying more tax to make it happen.

Ah yes, poverty and homelessness are so obviously caused by fee paying schools. It’s a no brainer.

Because you are buying in to class division.

I'm from an affluent yet left wing family, I would rather move to a costly area with an outstanding publicly funded school than send my child to a private / independent school. Which is what we are in the process of doing.

As discussed, fee paying schools perpetuate the class system. And the class system thrives on inequality. But let's not speak of it for fear of being called middle class.

I agree pay more taxes for both health education social care or stop embarking on ridiculous wars or how about spending an absolute fortune on trying to resolve the unresolvable?
The really privileged the super wealthy the oligarchs Sunday Times rich listers etc those who the likes of hulloa are really swiping at will still pay regardless because that is what they do (as I believe they do in the US?) but the wealthy middle classes and even the less wealthy middle classes I suspect the vast majority would choose the state sector.

You are paying to get your kids into smaller classes
bless
what will you do when they hit university?