All the country seems to be celebrating GCSE results, I am not!

[reasonableme]

Dear Mums,

Please help me see light at the end of what seems to be a dark tunnel.

Everyone on Mumsnet is celebrating their children's GCSEs - most posts I read were talking about their DC's 8s and 9s with the least grade I read about being a 6. Clearly all those super accomplished children's parents are all on Mumsnet or vice versa which is why I think this is the right forum for my question.

My DD was predicted 6s and 7s in most subjects but she ended up with 4s and 5s in most with just one 6. She cleared the entrance exam for a private school for 6th form earlier but now lost out on that seat as she couldn't clear the entry requirements. No school in the vicinity wants to take her. She prepared very well for GCSEs spending several hours every day. I personally helped her with several hours of revisions, free science lessons on YouTube , flash cards, practice etc. She was in top sets in her school for almost all the subjects. I am really struggling to understand what happened that her marks were so bad across the board. University path as we know is literally over for her and her a levels are a big question mark.

The school (state school, ofsted good) hasn't bothered to get in touch with me after the results and surprisingly they didn't express any surprise at her results. I emailed them requesting them for a remarking and I asked DD to resit maths and English GCSEs in November. I am trying to get private tutors while trying to get her admitted to 'some' 6th form college. I suspect she has mild ADD as she is highly fidgety and is into mindless dancing with music blasted into her ears. I am planning to take her to an educational psychologist for help. Other than that no major distractions (as if that was not major)!

Both DH and I had high academic backgrounds and her disastrous results are depressing to all of us. I have not become normal 4 days since and have been crying for days now that all my dreams for her have been shattered. Most universities want consistent track record so GCSEs matter more than we wish they did. The results are poor in all the subjects so there is definitely a major disconnect somewhere. How do I see light and how do I move on?

The apprenticeships thing can be a red herring as MN treats it a bit as if it is an 'easier' alternative for entry. I live in a backwater; I cna tell you no sodding apprenticeships round here! And you need to go through a VERY rigorous recruitment, harder tna unis' and -usually- post A Level!

OP, I'd focus on the fact that your DD absolutely still can do A levels with her ability profile (or BTecs if she'd prefer them)

I do know Santander does a cyber security 18 anway but worth thinking about. I think thay need about 104 UCAS points so quite challenging to gain access.

This article was partly the reason DD thought good universities may be out of reach for her. Thanks for the supportive kind words. I am definitely feeling much better now

www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-45209202

Words went missing there ! : should say a cyber security higher apprenticeship , so it's post 18 ...

OP those BBC answers are bollocks !

I don't know why they are fudging them so much and using corporate government speak- possibly because the answers have to be so general...

Last year at some point (after many schools had set A Level entry criteria, helpfully) the government decreed a grade 4 perfectly acceptable and more or less instructed universities, employers, schools etc to accept them as a qualification in line with the way they used to think of Cs.

A 4 is a 'standard pass' and a 5 is a 'strong pass' , officially.

We have had quite a few stroppy parents about this, where we have set 5s as entry requirements. They are perfectly entitled to kick up about this tbh since all unis (bar one) accept a 4 in Eng and Maths as basic entry requirements and yet schools set the bar higher.

I understand your disappointment, but you really must put your emotions to one side in order to focus on what she needs right now.

There’ll be time for you to allow yourself to feel the disappointment once she’s on a path that’s right for her.

For now, seek advice - there are plenty of options out there for her that could potentially see her achieve her chosen career path.

Before you commit to retakes, re-marks or anything else, take a breath and seek professional guidance.

But you do need to paste on a positive parental face and not let her see how much of an impact this has had on you. She is your priority here.

Best of luck with everything. All will work itself out.

Don't read articles like that and take them as gospel. Seek professional advice and guidance.

OP before you run away down the Uni route, your sentence here really jumped out at me:

and surprisingly they didn't express any surprise at her results

Its very possible of course that your DD was stressed or pressured and her results reflect the level of stress. However do the school know something you do not? I'm thinking of attendance or some other reason why her results would not come as a surprise to them. When school restarts is it worth talking with the form tutor or whomever & see what they say before you decide on another 5 years of formal education & an educational psychologist?

Wishing you both all the best xx

Totally agree Piggy! The sixth form DS is going to is massive and does more courses than most schools. OP's Dd would definitely get in with her grades and then they would advise her on whether the BTEC or A level route was the best fit. It's entirely possible that she just didn't cope well with the reality of public exams so qualifications with coursework assessment are better - and it's also possible she needs to have an assessment for possible support. It may be your best bet is FE college as it's generally a lot quicker to get assessments done and you can request this on enrolment.
By all means do a resit for maths but probe further before putting straight in for the November resit as there's practically speaking very little time to prepare for it.

OP, dd1 had meh results but went on to 6th form studying a level 3 Btec and 1 a level. She's predicted a C in the A level and top marks in the btec which means she can apply to very good unis for her degree (in a similar field to the btec). Btec suits her as its mainly coursework. I felt like you after her results.

I suggest those articles more for alternatives to A-levels and where to go for further help - so sorry about that.

Though I'm aware that FE provision has been hugely cut back there should hopefully still be something for her.

Oh OP! I really feel for you and your daughter.
You know when you start looking at a particular type of car to buy and then you see hundreds of them on the road? I think this is why you feel so bad. Everyone you see or hear is talking about their fabulous grades but really there are lots of students who got grades like your daughter’s.
Anyway, that’s beside the point. Your daughter has had a blip (pretty big) but it’s done now and she’ll have to get on with it.
I honestly think that all is not lost though. She sounds like a wonderfully dedicated and hard working student. Any college will bite her arm off to do BTEC qualification or such like. Maybe she’s just not an ‘exam person’? The grades don’t show her true ability. In which case, she won’t be suited to full on A’ Level linear courses where everything depends on the final exam.
I think you need to be upbeat about this and focus on the fantastic courses that are available, all of which will reflect her true hard working, natural ability.
Additionally, I would seriously recommend looking at apprenticeship degree schemes. I reckon these will definitely be the way forward without the humongous debt associated with a regular degree.
Of course your dreams for her are shattered. You love her and want the best for her. Good luck!

Some people are awful for telling you off!

I totally get where you are coming from

DS needs a 7 for the subjects he wants to do at A level (ie 7s! As a minimum) and if he won't get that, he can't do what he wants ....

That is tough.

If he gets 5s and 6s he can't do any of the a level courses he's interested in.

So it is definitely tough out there. Your post is very honest, and I applaud that. You and your DD will come up with a plan b I am sure.

Again, thanks for posting as this reminds me to make a plan b for DS going into y11 this year, as it's pretty competitive in some places ...

Good luck

@MidnightVelvetthe7th , there are other posts where mums mentioned that the schools called them to tell them the school is appealing for remarking (from a grade 8 to a grade 9 etc) so I thought the school would do that for cases where the actual grades are way off the predicted mark.

Of course you are disappointed. You were led to believe your DD should get 6s and 7s, she worked hard, yet came out with 4s and 5s. Who wouldn't be disappointed in those circumstances?

But now you need the plan B. An Extended Diploma (3 A level equivalent) in Computing sounds the way to go.

Pick yourselves up, dust yourselves off, and sort out a new track to reach the end goal.

I don't understand why the private school set an entrance exam - which she passed - and then also insist on certain grades. Surely it ought to be one or the other?

Bearing in mind the private school will charge fees - which presumably you are prepared to pay - then unless they are heavily oversubscribed at sixth-form level (unlikely, in my experience) it might be worth her (her, not you) going to see them and arguing her case. I used to teach in a private school and if I wanted a student I would still accept them even if they didn't quite make the grades - although I would have had to run it past SLT, of course...

Alternatively... DS2 decided not to go to uni - he didn't want the debt - but to go to work - in a computing/IT type of field. He now earns far more than I ever did as a teacher, and he has graduates working under him. The point being that a degree isn't the only way forward. But like others have said, if she wants to go to uni it's still perfectly possible.

I completely agree her preferences matter not mine. In fact I was no where in the picture when she chose her GCSE options. She wanted three completely different subjects from what she was offered because the school could not offer them (can't exactly remember why). I thought she has taken it on her stride.

The issue here is that the entry criteria in her first choice schools have prevented her from going there to study the subjects she loves to study. She has only been hearing rejections from all these schools over the bank holiday. One of the sixth form admissions officer wrote to her that they would never relax the entry criteria even if there are spaces left un-filled. It's a very competitive world out there!

I hope this will be a turning point in her life to do better things as some of you wonderful mums have said. I am so glad you said it x.

Did you go with your dd to collect results? Most schools do not preempt remark requests which have to come from the candidate, not parents or teachers. Some boards will allow papers to be recalled, often online now, and staff can review. However timeframes for this and remark requests are limited. As your dd seems to have underperformed predictions across the board it may indicate a lack of exam technique in applying her knowledge to the specific question or issues with focus.

@leonardthelemming , the private school had an entrance exam and an interview both of which she cleared last year. They then made a conditional offer which was based on her GCSE grades. Since her predicted grades were better than what the private school asked for, she didn't look for too many options after that. That's why it all came as a shock to her (and of course to me as rightly or wrongly, I have become too involved in her education)

I do think this is not the end of the world for your daughter and that there are plenty of routes that have been mentioned for her by other posters to still succeed in the future.
You do need to be positive for your daughter and be showing her with examples of "celebrities" in industry who did not do very well at exams but have subsequently been a success.
There is however one real concern for me. If the school was expecting 6 and 7s and your daughter actually got 4 and 5s across the board then there has to be a reason for that. An immediate question for me is why was she in the top group if the school was expecting 6 and 7s, when I would have expected the top group to have been in the 7 to 9 range. It could be the school have got it all wrong and have over-inflated the expected results for all, in which case you should be able to tell from other pupils' results. That does not say much for the school!
If however the school's results generally were good against target then you need to think through what is the issue with your daughter. Is it exam nerves, which I would have to say will have been exasperated by doing several hours study each evening? Given the spread of exams taken and getting the same kind of results I wonder whether your daughter has some issues around reading. Is it possible she is dyslexic to some extent for example? Or as somebody else has suggested does the school know something that you do not know.
I would go back to the school and see if they will talk through the different exams to highlight why the results were 4 and 5s as against the expected 6 and 7s. Try and get hold of the exam papers with the school and see where she has gone wrong. If you can find that out then there is the opportunity to do something about it for the future.

@LIZS , no I didn't go with her to collect the grades as she wanted to go on her own( I emailed the school later on Friday hopefully without much delay from my side). She immediately went to the private school with her grade sheet and they told her they can't accept her as she didn't meet the entry criteria. That's the point she was shattered. Wish I was there!

@admission , it's a great point. She was in the top sets as her targets were 7s and 8s and her predicted grades were 6s and 7s. I rechecked her Easter mock results and they were still 6s and 7s with targets as 7s and 8s except in one subject where it was a 5

Goodness, poor OP! Where on earth do you live that no local place will take a perfectly capable and ambitious young woman into their sixth form??

Does she want to do maths A Level? That may be the sticking point as it is often allowed to have higher entry requirements.

In the defence of teachers, it has been extraordinarily hard to predict outcomes this year as the GCSEs are new specs and marking systems in nearly every subject.

I honestly don't understand what you're on about. Of course, places will accept her its just not what you wanted for her. I have taken the GCSE's this year and I can 100% assure you that they weren't easy one bit. I passed everything that was needed but they weren't the magical 7's, 8's and 9's you dreamed of. (I know disgraceful right) but for someone who was predicted to get no GCSE's, I think I did well, But if I've managed to get into a Level 3 ICT course then I think your daughter is safe.

The fact your now crying about these events must be making your daughter feel like crud. Haven't you even said well done to her for what she has achieved? That answer is probably no because "All my dreams for her have been shattered."

Its her life and it should be her decision as to what she does.

It's time to step up and support her.

Get her signed up for a level 3 BTEC in IT. Assuming to she goes on to get DDM or above she'll get on a cyber security/IT degree. Get some better careers advice and/or pop down to your local college. She has got a decent set of results and around here would get a place at College even if she had to resit maths or English. At worst she might have to do level 2 BTEC alongside a couple of resits, then progress to Level 3 the year after.