Pengggwn
"And how was the behaviour actually dealt with? Did she have to apologise to the teacher she swore at? Was it explained to her that, when she said 'what she thought', she was also being rude and disrespectful?
Obviously you know your child and I don't, but I haven't met many children who would take anything away from the exchange you describe here other than 'Actually, it is okay to swear at the teacher and I'll get a reward later for not doing it for a week.'
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Perhaps it wasn't clear. She was left in no doubt that it was not ok to swear at a teacher, because the very first thing I did when I heard her say "worst day ever" and tell me what happened, was that I telephoned the school and spoke to the Head Teacher, which DD1 did not want me to do. I told her that DD1 could not behave like this and said that she didn't seem to appreciate the seriousness of her behaviour.
The HT told me that she would tell DD1 about the after school and Saturday detentions. I also said I would relay this to DD1. She assured me that DD1 had apologised to the teacher, and DD1 confirmed this when I asked for a more detailed explanation of the day.
DD1 is 12, but performs at a level more like half her age. The HT realised that she has taken a shine to her dog, which is a PAT dog, so she chose to use a walk with the dog as a motivator for future good behaviour, after correcting the bad behaviour.
DD1 got a very firm telling off from me, and was assured that I was on Team Teacher, and that if she got any red marks, she would have every electronic taken from her, and wouldn't be able to go to her SEN youth group until her behaviour improved.
However, the reason she is behaving like this in school is because she is getting angry with peers in class - she needs strategies to manage that, and as I'm not there, I can't provide them. Luckily, her school recognises that this is a job for them, and as she's in year 7, that may take some time to get right. They're committed to her and are happy that these occasions are rapidly reducing. They see it as a success, because the situations are becoming more infrequent and shorter lived.