Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Sixth-form girl living alone

523 replies

BoboChic · 16/03/2017 10:13

Do you think that a private mixed sixth form should admit a new pupil who will be living alone in a small rented apartment during the week, returning home to her parents at the weekend?

OP posts:
BoboChic · 17/03/2017 09:49

Those parents had not been made aware by the school of a major potential risk. They were deliberately kept in the dark and had no reason not to trust the school community as they always had.

OP posts:
Trifleorbust · 17/03/2017 09:51

Why would the school be responsible for disciplining students for their behaviour when they are in their parents' care and not actually doing anything wrong? What an odd thought.

Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 09:51

What right had they to be informed of anything? It's not and was never any more a major potential risk than any other year group. Every year has party house.

Do you understand that the school have a legal duty not to break the DPA and the ECHR?

BoboChic · 17/03/2017 09:54

It wasn't a "party house". A different situation entirely.

OP posts:
Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 09:55

The school would have been breaking the law if they had informed the other parents of anything to do with the girls living arrangements.

Do you understand that?

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza · 17/03/2017 10:01

Above, someone linked to the policies of SPGS and Westminster regarding pupils being left home alone.

I think schools are entirely right to have policies like that. Parents who leave their sixth formers alone for days on end are making bad choices (so judgemental! shame on me!). It's good to have the reminder that some schools are prepared to insist on this stuff, so parents like me who think it's very important can seek them out.

ohidoliketobebesidethecoast · 17/03/2017 10:03

Of course, at university the uni will make sure they all stay in their rooms and study every night - not!
Teenagers need to learn the self discipline to do 'enough' study to achieve the results they hope for. If the school supervises constantly, it merely postpones the problem ( I know several kids who got great A level results, but dropped out of uni due to no study, as they weren't being told what to do).
Parents need to teach their kids, progressively, to take responsibility for their study, and organise themselves to work.
I'm sure the school had a parent/school agreement, which spelled out what they were responsible for, and the conduct they expected from the pupils? And doubt it said that they would keep track of all movements and activities of sixth form pupils?

BoboChic · 17/03/2017 10:10

HoldMeCloserTonyDanza - Indeed.

Children need to live in structures that supervise them. Students who are under 18 when they start university have special provision made for their supervision.

OP posts:
Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 10:11

Bobochic.

I'll ask again.

The school would have been breaking the law if they had informed the other parents of anything to do with the girls living arrangements.

Do you understand that?

Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 10:12

What a damn shame all those other children who were all living at home with their parents didn't live in structures that were supervising them.

aginghippy · 17/03/2017 10:15

I also find it hard to believe that all of the teenagers would have kept the arrangement a secret for the entire two years. My dd tells me where she is going and sometimes mentions parents being there or not.

I think it's likely that some of the parents did know the girl had her own flat.

Trifleorbust · 17/03/2017 10:16

Children need to live in structures that supervise them

I agree wholeheartedly. We call them 'families'.

BoboChic · 17/03/2017 10:18

Could be a family, could be a boarding school. Here is France some DC "board" in residential structures (foyers) that are independent of the day schools they attend. Etc.

OP posts:
Trifleorbust · 17/03/2017 10:20

But these students weren't boarding, were they?

BoboChic · 17/03/2017 10:20

Annesmyth - I have not taken sides on the school's position.

OP posts:
BoboChic · 17/03/2017 10:21

They were living with their families on the understanding that all their fellow pupils were also.

OP posts:
Trifleorbust · 17/03/2017 10:29

What? That makes no sense. They were living with their families because they were living with their families, end of. That means their families were responsible for knowing where they were at any given time outside of school hours. Why are you incapable of understanding this?

Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 10:30

What the hell? So they only lived with their families if everyone else did too? What a load of rubbish.

BoboChic · 17/03/2017 10:36

Why are you incapable of understanding that the school breached the trust that parents had placed in it to ensure all pupils were living with their families?

OP posts:
aginghippy · 17/03/2017 10:36

They were living with their families on the understanding that all their fellow pupils were also.

If the parents thought that, they were a bit naive. I wouldn't make that assumption about my dd's classmates. Actually, I know a couple of them with unconventional living arrangements. But then it's a state sixth form.

Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 10:36

Where in the official paperwork from the school was that spelled out?

Trifleorbust · 17/03/2017 10:37

Because I have read the whole thread and have not seen any evidence that that was the case. Where and when was this agreed when these pupils were enrolled? Excuse me if I have missed something.

prh47bridge · 17/03/2017 10:42

The school would have been breaking the law if they had informed the other parents of anything to do with the girls living arrangements

Absolutely.

All the information held by the school about this girl is confidential. That covers:

  • her address
  • her living arrangements
  • her grades
  • her date of birth
  • her attendance record
  • and any other information the school held on her

The school would have been breaking the law if it disclosed any of this information to other parents.

It sounds very much like someone has broken the law to pass personal information about this girl to parents.

The school could have insisted that sixth form pupils live with their parents provided the policy was applied consistently to all pupils. However, there is absolutely no requirement for it to have such a policy. Most schools don't. Given that 16-year olds can legally leave home a blanket ban on pupils living alone may not withstand a legal challenge.

Having accepted a pupil who is living alone they absolutely must not tell anyone about this pupil's living arrangements. If other parents want to make assumptions that is their problem, not the school's. If the school is concerned that the pupil living alone might be vulnerable it would be a perfectly reasonable safeguarding measure to advise the pupil to keep their living arrangements confidential.

Nothing that has been posted so far suggests that the school has done anything wrong. All we really have is parents trying to find a way of blaming the school for their children's failure to achieve the desired grades. It won't wash.

readthethread · 17/03/2017 10:47

imo it's irrelevant where this girl was living, that was an issue between the girl's parents and the school. It's not ideal but i think it is ok for the school to "allow" it and also to not "inform" the other parents. It's a private living arrangement.

The other children, at sixth form should be responsible enough to do the work required to meet their expected grades. their parents should be monitoring them close enough to ensure they are.

My friend's parents owned 3 pubs. Every weekend we would go to one of them, my friend was usually managing one Shock - we would drink, party and crash there. Should the school have informed our parents that my friend was managing a pub every saturday night and we effectively had free rein? Of course i told my mum where we were but she assumed her parents were there and i didn't correct her!

WateryTart · 17/03/2017 10:47

I find it hard to believe that you are as ignorant as you appear, OP. Do you have comprehension difficulties?

Why are you incapable of understanding that the school breached the trust that parents had placed in it to ensure all pupils were living with their families?

Because they didn't. You have been told God knows how many times that it isn't the school's responsibility. Never was, never will be.