Nice boarding schools for girls!!

[egyptiandancer64]

My daughter left her country Prep school and we tried a London Day school which was very pressurised and a disaster as she didnt fit in. I then sent her to a boarding school where she is having a very tough time with a very disruptive year group and a lot of bitchy girls... Any ideas on nice schools ? Tudor Hall? although I think not very academic or Downe House which I fear may be pressurised as well and full of eating disorders...! Any other ideas for schools within an hour and a half of London. Preferably single sex but am beginning to think maybe co-ed too.She starts her GCSE syllabus in September so I need to move quickly and have been trying to find somewhere. She is rather fragile at the moment and I am terrified if I move her again and get it wrong again I shall have a child with rock bottom self esteem. Any ideas please?

Is Roedean too far? Maybe 1 hour 45 mins from West London. Lots of girls starting in Year 9 and a few in Year 10.

Queen Anne's at Caversham, near Reading. Have no personal experience but might be worth a look.

Mayfield, East Sussex? All girls, small, girls join in year 10 I think, horsey, creative, academic...

Kent College? Bedes?

So what is your DD like?

What (beyond niceness) would be needed to make school enjoyable for her?

What kind of environment is she happiest in?

What, as far as you have discerned, went wrong at the London school? What is there at her current school that might not exist elsewhere?

It's awful to feel a fish out of water at school - do you genuinely think she will settle once you find the right place? Was she happy at her prep?

yes too far for us am afraid... and very few English girls there these days! not being xenophobic but true!

My friend's daughter is very happy at St Swithins, in Winchester.

thank you for all helpful messages, re St Leonards Mayfield have heard good things and may try that one if not too local. We live in London so need a few from here if poss! Re what is she like... well hard working and quite driven and i think just wants to get on and do some work and if poss some sport. She has had severs very badly for almost two years so no sport hasnt helped her at all. We are not well off and I think her present school is full of rich girls who just talk about clothes and boys which really isnt her. London School was v pressurised three hours homework a night at 13! Plus no-one else had been to country prep school so fish out of water there as well! Happy at prep school until severs and knee probs meant she had to give up sport and in the last year I think all the girls got rather bitchy and hormonal and she felt left out in some way. I think she just needs a nice reasonably academic school thats not all about what clothes you are wearing! I fear this may be impossible though..

Try Queenswood, but it is super expensive. But lovely school, really caring :)

They offer bursaries which are means tested too, and not just given to existing pupils :)

I wonder if it's possible to find a school, state or independent, where teenage girls do not talk relentlessly about clothes and boys?

You don't mention it but, if your DD finds friendships with boys at least as worthwhile as with girls, perhaps a co-ed school might work better.

And, from what I've seen, independent schools that make a point of not welcoming international pupils do tend to be rather inward looking ...

Prior's Field in Godalming? London girls tend to weekly board. Not a hot house, no more bitchiness than any other girls' school. Not academically selective- challenging for bright girls, supportive for not so academic ones. Lots of sport, drama, all the usual add on stuff. Head of Pastoral is excellent, will support a fragile child really well. Mine was a nightmare the first half term, went into total meltdown. Pastoral care was very good. Good mix of parents, from super wealthy to those working really hard to send their girls there. Lots of normality. Good Luck!

I would second Mayfield. Nice mix. You can be clever, and they do particularly well with maths/science, but you don't need to be. Lots of singing and pottery. And horses. Unpretentious. More international in the sixth form but the group includes Mexicans and Spanish.

Marist school ascot or St George's school ascot or Heathfield school ascot, all very good, know parents from all schools and all very happy :)

What about St Edwards Oxford coed but has a very well deserved reputation for outstanding pastoral care, a mixture of girls high achieving, musical, sporty, arty, shy, extrovert, ones into ballet, drama, boys and clothes in the main normal teenagers all who thrive in a caring happy environment.

Friends daughter is here and she really likes it..... www.thorntoncollege.com/

Godolphin School, Salisbury. I used to board there. Train to London takes an hour and a half.

Princess Helena College.
St Francis College
Queen Anne's, Caversham

Beechwood Sacred Heart in Tunbridge Wells is lovely. One hour from London, and excellent pastoral care. It used to be all girls, but has fairly recently become co-educational.

What about Royal Masonic School for girls at Rickmansworth?
I worked there a few years ago and while not for the academically gifted girl it is good for the average one.

Does it have to be boarding?

Which school did the majority of girls from her country prep go on to? Could you try that?

Tbh you get bitchy girls at all schools mixed and single sex - it really gets better in year 10 when things get more serious.

There's Woldingham on the outskirts of London, and she could weekly board there. I don't know it directly, but have heard more and more good things about it, plus extremely good things about the head. It's Catholic, but not oppressively so.

As someone mentioned bursaries - even if you're not looking for one it might be wise to seek out a school that is serious about offering significant help to the talented but not-wealthy. It means a (slightly) more diverse intake and sets a certain tone - with brains and achievement being more celebrated than Gucci bags and numbers of acres at home. (That's the idea anyway ...)

I have to agree with Priorsfield. My daughter loves it there.

I appreciate that I am probably not one of the usual responders to this kind of thread, but to me one very obvious means of responding to a child who is 'fragile' and who has had several bad school experiences is to discount boarding altogether. Is there a reason why this can't be the case? Because surely one major way of maximising support for your child not only through transitioning schools but also longer term would be to opt for day schooling - allowing a. You to be an everyday supportive presence and B. To give her the 'outlet' of a home life and a sanctuary.

Changing schools must be hard even for a confident child. Boarding even more so, surely, for very obvious social reasons. For a fragile child, a huge ask. Surely day schooling to GCSE would be a far easier, kinder thing?