Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Secondary education

Connect with other parents whose children are starting secondary school on this forum.

Original poster

Year 11 GCSE Exam Support Thread 2

986 replies

HSMMaCM · 24/03/2015 20:24

New thread ..... (DD not sure about the prom dress she has bought!!!!)

OP posts:
Thread gallery
8
sillygiraffe · 06/04/2015 14:06

I am finding it hard not to be angry and disappointed with DD. So far these holidays she has done one day at school (RS) and was forced into an hour or so doing maths with her dad yesterday. She really does not care and its driving me nuts.

I just dont know what to do.

SugarPlumTree · 06/04/2015 14:17

What is DD wanting to do next year SG? Is she likely to get what she needs to get onto it? I suspect she knows full well she is driving you nuts remembering a few of my teenage moments.

I had a talk with DD not long ago saying I wasn't nagging but I just wanted her to be clear in her mind that she wouldn't regret using this time as she could be in a situation where her friemds were all doing the courses they wanted and she would have to do a level 2 course. Didn't have immediate effect but it percolated through. She is doing less than a fair few on here but is doing much more than she was.

Right now I think you have to look unconcerned. You can't make her so focus on yourself. Take yourself off for a bit, bury your head in books, do the garden, meet with friends. Do what you want to do much more and give yourself a bit of space .Others probably have better advice.

auntpetunia · 06/04/2015 14:32

We've had a major row this afternoon. as I was out first thing I texted about 10.30 are you revising? Got a text back just woken me up yeah ok I will.. got home at 12,30 and hes playing games on line. When I asked what he'd done he told me maths and Physics so DH asked to see what he'd done as both of those have past papers he's agreed to do, he mumbled about on line and nothing to show us; I'm afraid I lost it; told him I expected to see him doing at least 3 or 4 hours every day and I hadn't seen him do any English. He got really angry and was screaming how no one else is getting this much grief and I should just leave him to it, he did well in his mocks what more did I want?

So after telling him to calm down I told him again that all the nagging was for his own benefit and I also know for a fact that most of his friends mums are having the same conversations with his Friends. I explained that it's different being marked by an outside person who doesn't know you and your issues or way of working particularly his hand writing and number shapes are poor (he's dyslexic and dyspraxic) and whilst he had a scribe in English and geography ) but manages himself in maths and science's , I've marked past papers he's done and struggled to work out his numbers and he makes stupid mistakes cos he can't reread his own writing. after him huffing and growling through all this I told him he could just get on with it, if he wants to go to uni to do pharmacology then he has to get A's and B's to do the A levels he wants then he has to work he's got 34 days till first exam.

Not a good day and not proud of myself loosing it but...It might have worked, I went into the garden to just calm down and when I've come back in he's listen to An Inspector Calls on line and he's dug out his English notes from last year.

I need Wine

SugarPlumTree · 06/04/2015 14:47

WineWineWineWineWine Much sympathy from fellow lost it person .

CoffeeBeanie · 06/04/2015 14:52

sillygiraffe, the thing is, being angry and disappointed won't make them work.
I still am angry and disappointed, but don't show it.

I've taken her internet away and she hasn't done anything for the last week. Taking everything away won't help. It will make her resent me and not do anything to spite me and I want to keep talking to her.

I hope she will wake up soon.

She has actually asked for maths help today. Progress. I will try and persuade my maths teacher friend to tutor her.

bigTillyMint · 06/04/2015 15:12

Sympathies from me too.
Whilst DD is trying to revise and is keen to do well, it is a bit like walking on eggshells here too - I just try to keep out of the way and be encouraging.

It is incredibly difficult to step back, isn't it!

TheWordFactory · 07/04/2015 10:30

Sympathies to those whose DC are driving them potty. I know losing the plot isn't in the parenting manuals but I know I would be raging if it were mine!

The LA conundrum in Casa WF seems to be resolving. A sleep over was roundly dismissed as DD said they turn into non-sleep overs, but then DH was chatting to his neice on the phone and she was complaining that she can't revise at home (it's chaos central in their place) so he suggested she bunk at ours for a week.

She's 18 and very sensible/domesticated.

DH will be around most of the time I'm away (he works a few miles from the flat, or can work from home) except that one night, when the three of them should be fine.

I still feel a bit uncomfortable about abandoning ship at this time, but I know I'd be a fool not to go. I actually won't be in LA for long, but getting there and back takes the best part of two days. Anyhow I've booked tickets.

In the meantime, DC are doing well. Sticking to their schedules. DD told me that she's turned down an invitation to a party on Saturday night (saved me the trouble of saying no Wink). I was wondering what kind of parent agrees to let her DD throw a house party in the middle of revision. It's not the girl's birthday or anything. Some parents just can't stand to be the bad guy!

ErrolTheDragon · 07/04/2015 11:36

Sounds like your kids are sensible enough to leave with your neice, word. Hope you have a good trip! Smile

DD is off for her one in-school revision day today, so I've taken the opportunity to do some hoovering. I've been using her need for work/sleep as an excuse not to do any since the hols started! Grin

auntpetunia · 07/04/2015 12:38

After yesterday's blow up we seem to be back on track. He apologised last night after talking to some of his friends who told him their parents where just like me!! This morning he started at 10 and worked through till 12 on his English now hes having a break in the sun and said he'll be back to it at 2!

Original poster
HSMMaCM · 07/04/2015 13:23

DD chose not to go to a physics revision session at school this morning, but did revise all the sciences at home. She was at a house party at the weekend, but didn't stay too late (and didn't get drunk like many of the others!).

OP posts:
MummiUni · 07/04/2015 18:23

sillygiraffe DS is the asme. Doing very very little but doing nothing when pushed.

Do you and your DH take good cop/ bad cop roles? We do --- I am good cop and can get more revision out of him than DH who is bad cop. He is currently staring at a maths revision book with the timer set for 15 mins; I don't think he is actually focussing on the book as he glances at the timer every few minutes. aaggghhh

ErrolTheDragon · 07/04/2015 19:09

DD said her English revision sessions were boring but sort of admitted they might have been useful. It was a good day for her to be out though, a tree was being felled in the house behind us, chainsaws and woodchipper, nearest her room.

bigTillyMint · 07/04/2015 19:31

Mummi, would he be better doing a past paper (or a question or twoWink)?

Just how are they supposed to revise for MFL listening exams? Practising vocab is the needle-in-a-haystack approach!

spudmasher · 07/04/2015 19:38

I'm finding growth mindset theories useful in talking to DD. Cheesy, but the subtle shift in focus does seem to be making her feel less hopeless and more in control
www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/217172.Carol_S_Dweck

TeenAndTween · 07/04/2015 19:49

Tilly There are MFL listening (and reading) things on BBC bitesize. My DD used them for mocks.

bigTillyMint · 07/04/2015 19:56

Yes, T&T. the teacher recommended them, but DD doesn't seem to rate them. Will try to get her to have another go.

Spud, I am liking them! I read the autobiography of Chrissie Wellington at half-term - was going cheap on Kindle, and found it completely inspirational - just a "normal" woman whose determination and drive led her to amazing achievements.

TeenAndTween · 07/04/2015 20:01

What I found with DD was that some she said were 'too hard'. So I suggested she needed to listen over and over with, if needed, the transcript and/or translation to help until she could identify the words properly. So she slowly tuned in to the different accents.

DD's had 5 days off (we've been away), revision starts tomorrow ...

spudmasher · 07/04/2015 20:05

Tilly that looks like a good read. Carol Dweck has some interesting chapters about sports people in her Mindset book- some great stuff about John McEnroe that makes his behaviour make perfect sense. Good stuff about Tiger Woods too.

LynetteScavo · 07/04/2015 20:17

Well DS is doing no revision. Zero, zilch, nothing at all.

I am not nagging, as I know it would be pointless, and even counterproductive. He did go to his maths tutor today, but hadn't completed the paper the tutor had left with him. TBH, I'm more embarrassed and frustrated than cross.

I've just re-read the paper work which came with his end of term report, and unless they have reached their FFTD (Fisher Family Trust) grade in 5 subjects including English, Maths and Science, then they won't be allowed exam leave.

I'm trying to figure out if the if the FFTD grade is the same as the teacher target. (Does anyone know?) If so DS will have to be in school (Mwahahahahah!) which I'm really pleased about, as he'd only be sitting at home staring at a screen otherwise.

spudmasher · 07/04/2015 20:27

Too many distractions at home I think. When are they proposing study leave starts?
I am pleased that DDs starts after half Whitsun term........which is when her exams start!

LynetteScavo · 07/04/2015 20:30

8th May...so a couple of weeks before half term.

bigTillyMint · 07/04/2015 20:37

I have no idea what DD's FFTD grades are. Unless they are the Target Grade, as opposed to the Predicted GradeConfused

spudmasher · 07/04/2015 20:41

No idea- all we have is the predicted grades and what she got in the mocks (bit of disparity there......)
I just did a quick google and it looks like it's a school tracking thing for setting ambitious targets for children, but that would be more use in Year 9 I would think. Not much can be done in the final few weeks before the exams. It seems a bit de motivating if kids know they are hurtling towards failure because of aspirational targets. I know my DD thinks she's going to fail before she's even begun- all that aim for the moon and if you fall you'll land in the starts rubbish- just equates to a failure to her if she doesn't meet the target.

bigTillyMint · 07/04/2015 20:57

Spud, that's exactly how DD was/is feeling - targets have been set very high and they have been compared to them throughout Y10 and 11, so basically failing every time they do an exam/piece of marked work. It's very harsh.

Original poster
HSMMaCM · 07/04/2015 21:49

Same here. Target grades are above predicted grade (except one subject). Doesn't motivate DD to try harder, just makes her sad.

OP posts: