The big Eton, Harrow, Radley, Winchester question...

[TinkerBellThree]

I have been reading a lot of threads on this site and found it hugely informative (and sometimes quite amusing). I hope you don't mind me picking your brain as I find that I am increasingly confusing myself.

Our DS is in year 5 and we have started to visit senior schools for him.
We have seen Radley, Harrow, Eton and Winchester, and been to a few co-ed schools as well, but have decided that single sex is probably more right for DS.

DS is quite academic (though I tend to believe he is not as much so as his school tells me he is), sporty and very competitive. He is very social and he loves to try out new things.

Our DS' Prep is adamant that he is made for Eton and Eton is made for him, and I must admit we loved the school when we visited, so we have put his name down there. However, it is exceedingly hard to get into and I am not counting my chickens (and I think the likelihood of a place is slimmer than slim) so I believe we need (several) back-up(s) - so here is where I am getting confused...

Radley (who I understand is a "normal" backup for Eton) is not encouraged by our DS' school (not sure why) and Harrow worries me a little with its reputation of not being very challenging academically (has this changed?).

Originally we ruled out Winchester as it was not "sporty" enough, but having been to visit, we have had to re-think as we found there were lots of opportunities for our DS to do sports. Our DS' Prep think it should be on our list - but is a boy so "suited" for Eton really suited for WinCol?

All the above schools are within easy reach of where we live, so we will have ample opportunity to see matches etc.

Where should we put DS' name down? For all the schools on our list + some (as he may not get into any of the above)? Or should we be more focused?

I know a lot of you have vast amounts of experience and possibly been through the same conundrum yourself, and I would really very much appreciate your input.

Not read the thread, so apologies, just replying to your initial post. Winchester and Eton are consistently way up on the exam tables. Harrow is below them and Radley further still. I'd be taking a very close look at what they offer (which could be a phenomenal amount of extra curricular/ outstanding support to less academic boys etc) to justify aiming for a school that has modest results.

Horses for courses..........day/weekly boarding/full boarding/home schooling. There is no right nor wrong IMO.....suspects some will disagree**

On the contrary, if you RTFT I think you'll find that the one thing everyone does agree on is that different DCs in different circumstances suit/need different schools.

worcestersauce the friends I mentioned was in response to a previous posters comments about choose weekly boarding rather than full boarding. In my very extensive experience and as I've already pointed out weekly and full boarding are two different animals if you want full boarding then you are likely to not be overly satisfied with a weekly boarding school (and vice versa). I gave one example of this (and could have given more).
I have over the years on numerous occasions stated that 1 independent schools are necessarily better than state schools, 2. that no school however "hallowed" is right for every child and in fact clearly stated above that I wouldn't even send my dog to the other three mentioned in the title of this thread 3. It's all about finding the school with the right ethos that suits you and your child. That might be a day school (state or independent) a flexi, weekly or full boarding school, or it could a Steiner school or one riddled with meaningless ritual and ridiculous umiform. It down to what works for you and your DC. If it works for you and your DC then it's not inferior in any shape of form, for you and your DC its simply the best school in the world but this does not mean it will be for another family.

worcestersauce thank you for the grammar lesson. I have never held myself up as an expert on either spelling or grammar as I have very signifucant dyslexia and make numerous spelling and grammatical errors. I frequently have to change words because the spell check can't recognise what I'm writing or look up spellings etc.My spelling and grammar was heavily criticised at school and its only now that I'm old, fat and grey that I no longer care what others think about it and I've developed the confidence to write on forums like this.
This is a usually a friendly informal section of MN where people opinions are genuinely sought not a spelling grammar test.

notagiraffe I don't think you will find that Harrow is too far behind Eton academically these days with the full effect of the new head there now beginning to come through. Winchester is obviously an excellent school and the most academic of the bunch however as has been said before the overall results are not the best metric of which school is best for one's DS. The school and everything it represents must suit your boy's character - this is why we chose H over E. Yes, E is also an excellent school ( before we get a few people shrieking on here over the Eton uber alles , as they say in Germany) and coming from an H advocate that's refreshing. So if nothing else as prospective parent must spend significant time at the schools being considered in order to get a true feel - schools change and the changes can be subtle yet profound.

I think you will find many Eton parents who would acknowledge that Harrow and Eton are on a par, I know at least one family who have a son at each.

Quio totally agree that the most important aspect is that the school is a good fit for the boy. The Winchester boys I know felt like they'd come home when they toured the school. My boys felt the same about their day school. I couldn't drag them away from it whereas everywhere else they just headed for the cakes and look at their watches.

Well, that may or may not be so, OEs end up working for OHs, but what’s for sure is that all alumni from any school you care to name, end up ultimately working under the direction of that OE at No. 10! grin

I am afraid with recent events that is not a ringing endorsement for Eton. Two OEs have messed up the UK between them. One by being out of touch of the reality and worries of people's lives outside his gilded bubble and assuming too much, the other using his undoubted abilities to misdirect people for political means.
I hope that present Etonians will learn something from this but I fear not. Sorry but I am cross and past posts like that one and others of Peterenas just encapsulate the attitudes I would most want my DCs to avoid however desirable a school.

The overwhelming majority of OEs steer well clear of politics (very wisely IMO).

To be fair to Eton, having watched the documentary about Boris a few years ago, I think he might have been even worse if he hadn't gone there .

As everyone knows lover of Eton me but I don't think we can blame it for today's disaster!

The UK needs good politicians but not of this sort.
Indrid I am afraid that I cannot see how the Eton and Etonian characteristics that Peterenas portrays would in any way counterbalance developing that sort of ambition and arrogance.
I know that there are loads of 'normal' OEs but it does n't take many of the other sort to cause havoc.

” I am afraid with recent events that is not a ringing endorsement for Eton. Two OEs have messed up the UK between them.”

Either you are supremely ignorant, sendsummer, or your knowledge of British history is absolutely zilch in order for you to make this kind of comment which is not too far short of criminal slander/libel. I reckon you owe the two OE’s and the great School at Windsor all of whom you’ve defamed, an apology, after you’ve educated yourself with this short article.

One wonders if this half-century “mess” could all have been avoided if it was handled right from the very onset by that OE (bottom-left of top picture) instead of the grey-suited grammar schoolboy at the centre?

One wonders if this half-century “mess” could all have been avoided if it was handled right from the very onset by that OE (bottom-left of top picture) instead of the grey-suited grammar schoolboy at the centre?

What do you even mean by this? Why the cryptic links? Who would have been better at dealing with ... what? Should Jeremy Thorpe have handled the EU? the Eurovision? The brexit? What?

Why don't you say what you mean in plain English without links to wikipedia?

Read my message. What is "right from the very onset"?

That JT pic was taken in the early 1970s. Does it look like a scene from Eurovision?

Or does it look like a snap taken 36 hours ago when Brexit was declared?

Or do you think those guys are at an EU conference - a term that didn’t exist until two decades later?

I've read your message. It is incomprehensible.

Maybe there is a code that is given to parents of Eton students but the rest of rely on simple declarative sentences for communication. Could you give that a try?

I’m glad you’ve admitted it’s incomprehensible - to you.

I promise there’s no hidden code in the message. It’s written in plain simple English. Try reading it again.

Peteneras I do owe you an apology; I misspelt your username. Otherwise you are reinforcing what I said previously - Sorry but I am cross and past posts like that one and others of Peteneras just encapsulate the attitudes I would most want my DCs to avoid however desirable a school..
Poor communication and the trap of delusion are IMO other critical characteristics to avoid.
Happygardening is quite right, Eton overall as an institution can't be blamed for the consequences of the two sides of the EU campaign but those consequences are a lesson for those who regard political power per se as an emblem for the reputation of that school.

I'm staggered that peteneras is slinging around accusations of criminal libel with so little foundation and without bothering to check what on earth s/he is talking about. If that's a demonstration of what Eton produces, no thanks.

summer I'm sorry, but you are sounding as unhinged as Peteneras! He has a very strange special feeling towards Eton, shared by no other Etonian parent, or Etonian, that I have ever met.

You may be interested to know that the poll held within the school this half resulted in a resounding vote for Remain, at 65%, significantly higher than in the country as a whole.

IMO the havoc has been caused by the failure of the Labour Party to get to grips with their voters, and explain to them that Brexit is not going to have any effect on immigration whatsoever!

Good grief, I came on this board to get away from the inanities on this subject which abound on the other boards. This may well be the thing that is finally going to wean me off MN for good actually. So if you don't see me around, you'll know I'm in the garden, instead of wasting time on my iPad.

The blame has to be laid squarely at the feet of an old Etonian who did not need to call a referendum.. That act is what has caused this havoc. All parties are responsible for ignoring great chunks of our society but that decision to appease the right in his party led us to where we are today.

Indrid I know that Peteneras has a unique glorified view of Eton and its auminis' contributions to the UK but many posters reading this board may take his views as typical.
BTW I am not commenting on the political stance of present Etonians but the responsibility for incompetence and misdirection for two 'powerful' OEs. I have ranted enough now.

Cameron is clearly at fault for agreeing to the vote and I'm no fan by any stretch of the imagination but I very much doubt that being an old Etonian has anything to with it. He just completely misjudged the mood of man on the Clapham omnibus who's worried about immigration, stirred up by the likes of the DM and economically illiterate.
A complete tragedy.

I think that DCs political misjudgements could more realistically be laid at the feet of his political educators at Oxford. Just saying!

Fair point Indrid, 'education' is not restricted to a person's school. However a certain poster uses OEs in prominent positions as emblematic of the desirability of the school, that logic works both ways. I feel parents should not use those views to guide their school choice.