Merry Christmas to all other SAHP's

[yorkshirepudsx]

Hi all!!

With Christmas fast approaching I just wanted to take the time to say Merry Christmas!

As we all know - we don't get the Christmas party's, the bonuses or gifts from bosses. We don't get to dress up and go all out feeling our best.
For us, the work actually increases over the festive period and more often than not, we end up burnt out!
I've been so stressed working out how we're going to afford XYZ, if my little one is going to be happy with his gifts (which I know he will, but I'd give him the world if I could!)
Then of course, organising Christmas Day & Christmas dinner for my little family + 8 guests, I don't have enough seats or plates🤭 then the wrapping, my GOD the wrapping!!! 🤯🤯🤯

So I'm just here to say - I feel you, I see you! And I know things may seem like a huge marathon, all just for one day! - But please let yourself have a merry little Christmas too! Whether it's a short but sweet 5 minute bath with a crappy bath bomb, or a sneaky half glass of wine once the kids are in bed 🤗
We get so caught up in the worries and stress of it all, so don't forget to give yourself some time this year, even if it's just 5 mins! Or let yourself eat that box of chocolates whilst you hide from the kids 🙈
I hope you all have a lovely Christmas and best wishes for the new year❤️❤️❤️

I'm on first ever maternity leave for this Christmas and I understand your concept op, although it's made me aware how the intensity is only going to increase when back at work and she is actually aware!! Quite the future reality check..... I cannot describe the fear!!

Ten points for taking the come back so well though, merry Christmas, make sure you do something for you not just your family xx

Aw @Weewillywinki I love the way you describe your DS as a colleague 🤣 I might adopt that one. I hope you get your lovely dinner this year!

Merry Christmas OP! 🎄 xxx

I work full time.

No Christmas Party
No bonus
No gift from the boss

In addition to my full time job

I also have to buy and wrap the presents.
Organise Christmas Day
Christmas Dinner for 11 guests.

Aye Merry Christmas

This wasn't a dig at working parents, I apologise if you've take it as that!

but please find time for yourself over the festive period in anyway you can & Merry Christmas,

I apologise again for anybody who's taken insult and negativity from my post, was not my intention or sentiment to it.

I know both working and not working is hard and both have their pro's & cons, I guess my post was just because I'm missing the pros of working and I just feeling like I'm drowning in everything at the min.

You might be looking back with rose-tinted spectacles, OP, or maybe had nicer working conditions than a lot of us (especially if you're thinking about bonuses).

Either way, you've been very nice to apologise and very gracious in your replies. I hope the fact that some people - me included - don't agree with you hasn't upset you.

I hope you and your family have a very happy Christmas

I worked on retail when I was a student. I loved working Xmas eve. We had such fun with the men who came in panic buying.

I'm a stay at home mum and I will certainly be having more than half a glass of wine and will not be waiting for the kids to go to bed!

I just didn't want to cause any upset to anybody at all, I wish everybody a merry Christmas, especially with how the previous two we were under restrictions etc!

I hope you have a lovely Christmas, and best wishes for 2023 🎄❤️❤️❤️

Yessss!! Have a glass (or ten???) for me too! I'm early days expecting again, so the alcohol part won't be included for me 🤭 have a lovely Christmas miltonj xxx

I adored working Xmas Eve in retail - for the same reason!🙈

You sound very lovely but your DH should be pulling his weight too and if money is an issue you might want to consider a part time job? They’re desperate for people in retail at the mo, evenings and weekend and then your DH can do some childcare, ‘life admin’, wrapping and so forth.

Come and get a job with me in a well known supermarket evenings and weekends. You get the joy of retail and your very important breadwinner husband can take on some of the hard stuff, like wrapping and planning Xmas dinner.

If I didn't live so rurally I genuinely would in a heartbeat!! I don't drive and we're 90 mins away from the closest supermarket, so it would be a faff for him getting me there and back with the kiddies, however - I'm hoping to pass my driving test in 2023 so once I have my own car I may return to retail 🤭

@yorkshirepudsx

what do you mean “a sneaky half glass of wine”??

why would you only have half a glass?

why would you need to be sneaky about it?

Tbf to everyone saying what about me. I work! you did post on SAHP not AIBU.

I've not worked for 7 years, have 3 kids at home and totally get what you miss about work Christmas lunches and Secret Santa etc.

How've on general it sounds like you and DH need a chat. Why are YOU the only one worrying about money? Why have you moved so far out that its left you isolated and stranded? Why can't he drop you near a reasonable bus route and you go into town for coffee and lunch with friends or alone? Why isn't he doing more?

Luckysantangelo, there wasn't anything to that just me saying 'oh if you want a sneaky glass of wine, do it' sort of thing, don't read into that at all it's just me trying to say if anybody needs time to theirself (no matter what way) then to do it, idk

Thank you I've been feeling really overwhelmed this week so even tho it's horrible nice to know I'm not the only one 🙈 merry Christmas!xx

Thanks, op! I'm at home for a few years while the kids are young (DS is 2.5 and I'm pregnant with no.2). I do miss the work parties / meals and generally Christmas atmosphere of being with other adults. Doesn't help that three good friends of mine moved away and it's been hard to build up a "mum" friend circle (I live abroad). Dh has had his Christmas party and even had a Christmas breakfast this morning so I've been living it through him 😅
We've got a nice Christmas date night planned tomorrow night for when DS is sleeping with some treats and a Christmas movie.

Merry Christmas to you and hope you find some time for treats too!

Sooo much of what I've said/how I've said it is being taken so out of context or picked apart like some sort of English literature lesson 🤯🤯🤯

We chose to move further away for various reasons, there were so many pros and cons but the cons of staying in town, closer to people, etc outweighed the cons of living here, the house is cheaper itself and cheaper to run, and we're away from a lot of toxic situations. My partner works away for weeks at a time, when he is home he does help as much as he can, but for now he isn't home so all the responsibilities fall on me, which was our choice, but we all choose the lives we lead (as a lot of you pointed out above) but that doesn't mean I'm not allowed to miss things for how they once was, I still appreciate the little things I have. I shouldn't have to justify every in and out.

As I've said, I am sorry if this post upset you - that was not the intention!

However, I posted it to the SAHP board, to reach out to any other SAHP's feeling similar in any way. I wanted to see if there were any other parents feeling overwhelmed at the lack of adult communication around this time of year, etc. some of the things I listed I know everybody struggles with regardless of work situation. I guess I was having a rant but trying to be cheery and a little humorous to reach out to other Stay At Home Parents that are feeling the same pressures.

Merry Christmas!! Hopefully the overwhelming feeling subside a little for us both, sending you love ❤️❤️❤️

odd post. Our office doesn’t have a Christmas party thank god. You can still get dressed up and go out. Nice you have a lot of spare time to plan Christmas…

I've been struggling to make mum friends too! So I feel you 100% on that one!! Enjoy your date night 😍😍 we have films and snacks planned for Christmas Eve when the littles are snoozing away 🥰 merry Christmas ❤️🎄❤️

It may appear to be spare time to you, but it's not spare, read all of my comments and you'll see that I meant no negativity towards other parents by my post.

@yorkshirepudsx

fair enough

you could still get dressed up and go out with your mates though.
why don’t you do that? Could help you feel a bit more festive party mood??

Op, I would absolutely fast track driving lessons. It must be very isolating for you.