Internet pornography

[NKffffffffeace0ed1X128a12cac94]

I discovered on my husband's laptop that one night while I was sleeping he was looking at internet porn. Not so bad ,you think!, it get's worse. On his history of websites and images were sites involving pre-teen girls. I have confronted him and get the usual I don't know why,I'd had too many beers,I don't even like young girls,I didn't get an erection, blah blah blah. It wasn't just one site or one search although he claims they were all linked and he clicked on the link, although I believe you can't do that on google images. Every time I think of it I feel physically sick and don't know what to do. We have 4 boys of 3,10,14 &17. I keep thinking about their friends and girlfriends he will come into contact with. Am I over reacting? What should I do? I have no one to share this with as both my parents died last year. Can anyone help?

good plan from dittany there op - if you really cannot face speaking to the police then phone the nspcc and at least get some advice.

this whole thing is making my skin crawl - but please stay op - i think you need to talk this through.

A friend of mine is a defence solicitor who not that long ago had to defend a paedophile charged with dowloading illegal images. I asked her if people can "stumble" across such sites accidentally and she reckoned that it was rarely an accident. "Never Google 'PTHC'" was her advice, though I had no idea what the initials meant. "PreTeen Hard Core" apparently. So if the OP's DH was deliberately Googling "Preteen" then I'd wonder how innocent his intentions were.

The only other thing that strikes me is that the OP should be careful what she herself ends up viewing when searching for her DH's viewing habits, in case she too is technically guilty of looking at illegal pictures, even though she's only trying to find out what her DH is at.

you would think in today's modern world, we could prevent google from showing up webpages/images with certain words like 'pre-teen'.

i don't understand how there can't be some kind of net for such images/content.

From what you said about the images you searched you need to act. He's wised up now because he knows you're watching him.
I'm hoping it was a mistake but it's sounds odd.
Is there anything else to make you suspect him?

As a pornographer I can assure you that 'preteen' does mean child abuse images and is different from 'barely legal' which means 25-year-olds in school uniforms.

And it's fairly difficult to 'accidentally' look at images of children being abused (whether records of abuse or computer-generated Photoshoppery) by accident. So I would agree that the OP's husband has unhealthy tastes and interests and that she should contact WA/NSPCC on her own account and the police to deal with him.

bjawn you really do make no sense. Preteen is preteen (pre - as in before, and teen - as in 13 and up) and isn't just a clickthrough on a normal porn site (no idea what porn sites you've been using )

OP I really hope you are ok, and have to agree with others, this isn't something innocent Are there any other search words that you've seen? There are a few others that are definite signs he was looking for child porn. Though the lack of them doesn't make him any less guilty.

Please do something about it, or, if you really can't face reporting him yourself, let someone on here do it for you.

Some points to consider: Firstly, my advice to the op would be NOT to search through the computer looking to see what he has or has not looked for. If she does that, then a) she is potentially committing an offence herself, and b) if this does end up with the police she may find that she has compromised the evidence.
Secondly, it is just about possible to accidentally get onto these sites, but someone would have to be in the "right" area to get there - i.e you can't suddenly get from national rail enquiries to child porn, but if you are on porn sites anyway then it might just about be possible.
Thirdly, there is an organisation (afraid I can't remember what it is called - possibly Stop or something like that) where men who are worried that they might be attracted to children can get help - might be an option to explore if OP wants to do something other than go to the police.
Finally and most importantly, the crucial issue is child safety - the children on these sites are real, as is the abuse. Demand for pictures fuels the supply. It is a growing industry and needs to be stopped. OP also needs to consider her own children and their friends - "just because" someone looks at child porn on the internet doesn't mean that they would themselves abuse a child, however ...
For what it's worth, I cannot conceive of staying with someone who looked at child porn (it is, believe me, truly truly vile - I've seen alot in a professional capacity), I cannot conceive of ever trusting them around a child, and I would contact the police.

Best advice I would give is, hand that laptop into the police immediately, they have magic ways of making things that have disappeared reappear! Jokes aside though, they can find out what he's been doing without you comprimising evidence or getting yourself into trouble.
If SolidGoldBrass is right, then act now.

I'm so sorry to hear what you're going through, it must be so terrible for you

OP, are you able to sit down with your dh and have further honest and frank discussions with him? MrsBarchester's post re: contacting an organisation is a good idea, perhaps your dh has some issues that need addressing?

Much of the outcome from this discovery would depend upon whether this is a long term habit or curiosity. If it's been a case of first time curiosity then is it possible that counselling or something to that affect could prevent things going further? If he's made a habit of it then yes, there is only one option...

I'm sure we would all be abhorred to find our dh's/p's looking at porn involving children and an immediate reaction would be to involve the police, however, as the OP has said, there is a wider picture to consider. If it were as easy as turning him into the police and walking away I'm sure the OP would have done that by now.

NK needs all the help and advice she can get it on this and arguing over whats right/wrong about porn won't get her far. Hopefully somebody can come along with more names/numbers for professional organisations that are better qualified to advise.

Unfortunately, OP is not the first and won't be the last to find oneself in such a situation

OP, why you are even questioning what you should do is beyond me. You surely know the answer to that.
If the girls look pre teen but are really older, then as far as I am conserned he should still be strong up. To look pre teen the girls would look 11/12, it's like excusing peadophiles. "Oh, it's ok because they're legal!" No it's not!

But OP I do feel sorry that you are in such a mess, but you have to realise if he didn't stumble across this stuff (which you have no way of proving) he will be in serious trouble.

By the way I am not totally anti-porn, some girls do go into through choice, it is their choice to make.

OP, try having a look on here

OP, I think you have your answer and I am sure you are feeling terrible. Please go to the police, if your DH is looking at this stuff he has betrayed you and mislead you, you are not being disloyal by informing the Police. If you can't do it straight away please tell someone in authority and get help.