Anyone else has a dh who talks too much during sex?

[NinaJane]

I love this man, but how do I make him stop?

You see, I set the scene in my mind - location, mood, various appropriate characters etc and things go fine for a while until my dh shatters it with just one spoken word - then I have to start from scratch again. I'm the kind of gal who cannot climax without a little bit of help from my imagination .

I've tried a gentle sshhh - doesn't work. I've tried to involve him in the process, but then he says something completely out of context and my whole picture blows up in smoke.

How do I tell him to just shut up, without offending him?

gag him

Earplugs?

Is he not saying saucy things then? It's not along the lines of 'have you remembered to pay the gas bill' is it? That would ruin the mood

Well it depends on what he is saying I suppose....

what is it he's saying?

ChallengingCitrusHalibut - lol!

It's hard to know as a guy, DW sometimes gasps that she wants me talk to her (sexy stuff only mind, not bills), but sometimes i wonder if i overdo it..

What is he saying??

You do the talking, say it out loud, whatever is in your head.

I also need to know what he is saying.. I once had sex with a guy who chatted way tmi IMO .. It was off putting.. Shame too as he was a pure Adonis. Please note the slept with him once! I could bare to do it again.

Seriously just ask him to groan or something instead as it puts you off.

In my mind I'm bent over my old Science teacher's desk and dh says: 'Are you sure dd1 is sleeping?'

Then I'm being ravaged by a stranger in the alleyway behind the pub and my dh says:' Did you put the dog out?'

When I try to involve him, I tell him that he is the pool boy and I am the bored housewife - then he will pipe up and say :'I can suck like a pool vacuum.'

It's hopeless really.

Tell us what he's saying! I have to say though that if DH announced during sex that he was (finally) cleaning out the garage, replacing the letter box or attaching to skirting in the conservatory he'd get a heck of a lot more than he bargained for in my response - iykwim

Couldn't

Erm can't you just enjoy sex with your husband?

Sounds likes hes bored because you're off in cuckoo land thinking about your science tesher?!

Duct tape?

Omg lol .. Your going to have to tell him straight..
"darling when I'm in the middle of fantasising about being bent over the science teachers desk.. Can you not ask if the dc's are asleep or if the dog has been put out.. It really puts me off"

Disenchanted5 - sshhh...

I once had a fling with a guy who let out this irritating, self-depreciating giggle just after orgasm (his, not mine!). It drove me BESERK by the end, because I would always wait for it. And he always did it. Argghhh!
But I've never had a chatty lover - oh, apart from the one who was always trying to take the lead, and insisted on going at a snails pace because it was sexier or more adult or whatever. He kept saying "just be". Never shag a hippy.

End of rant

I had a boyfriend who didn't make a single sound during the whole event. Very disconcerting...

Oh god, yes that is much, MUCH worse! I suppose talking at least lets you know they are there (if it's dark). Better than a deafening silence.

rofl I love that someone can giggle in a self deprecating way after sex...........that must be a huge let down. agree with the two above, much rather talk too much than not at all lol

lol @ the gas bill....

I find the very hottest sex is when we don't say a word, especially in the dark.

Silk scalf over the mouth. Additional silk scalves to tie his hands to bedstead if he can't keep his hands still as well.