Not sure how to put this but how do I get over thinking that hmmm, bodily fluids are eeeuurrgghhhh during sex!

[ilikeyoursleeves]

As I said, not really sure how to put it! Was going to name change but what the hell... I've not always been like this (I don't think) but I don't particularly like all the 'ickiness' of sex! By that I really mean when DH comes- I never go down on him anymore after nearly puking at the taste of it, I don't like the smell of it, the feel of it or the smell or thought of oral sex. (I love receiving it though which probably makes me the world's most selfish lover!). And most often after having sex I have to go and wash my hands, is that normal?!

I feel like I can't let go and I'm worried DH will feel put out at the lack of adventure he's getting! I've had 2 DC's (youngest 6 months) so that might be a factor?

Anyone else like this or am I a freak?! Any hints to help me get back into it all? I enjoy sex once we get going but I'm usually too tired (surprise surprise), maybe things will get better once DS2 sleeps better.

[Malificence]

BJ over a condom ? God NO. Can't see that's much fun for either party.

[crankytwanky]

Put a sterident under his foreskin when giving him oral sex.
Not only will your teeth be sparkling white but his knob will be minty fresh!

[crankytwanky]

Seriosly though, is it a practicality thing? Would you be adverse to a pearl neclace if you didn't have to clean up afterwards?

I can see where you're comming from (No pun intended!) as my DH has really thick jiz that gets stuck in between my teeth! But on my body it's easy enough to clean up.

[AnyFucker]

oh for gawds sake, I am trying to enjoy a creme egg here....

[MarineIguana]

AF - pmsl

cranky - BOAK

[Malificence]

Stuck in your teeth, what, like toffee?

Look, Kerry ( God I hope you're not my SIL!) - I'm sure that most men ( my DH included) adore getting head, just like most women, BUT, not all of them do.

[ilikeyoursleeves]

maybe I'm a bit OCD cos I always wash my hands loads during the day but that's cos I am wiping two tiny bums all day long!

I can't seem to go to sleep after knowing that I have stuff all over my hands. Actually the more I think about it I think it might be to do with the fact that DS2 still feeds during the night and I don't want any 'germs' to go on him?

[Malificence]

AF - I do approach oral much in the same yummy way as a creme egg. Apart from biting the end off, obviously.

[sungirltan]

op nah your not alone i could have written that post....but my grossed outness has gone up big style since i had dd so maybe it is something to do with the dealing with poo all the time?
i reckon with me that bf is such a personal space killer that when i'm dome with it for the day the last thing i want is dh slobbering all over me!

meanwhile you can get these little sachets of lube in ann summers flavoured like naff cocktails (pina colada etc) they are brill for disguising yucky tastes. durex very cherry also good.

af - he he he

[AnyFucker]

germs ?

that's a bit OTT

[MarineIguana]

Maybe if you could get your DH to eat enough creme eggs, the experience could be transformed into a gloopy cadburyesque delight?

[AnyFucker]

sungirltan...have you read all the thread ?

[EssenceOfJack]

Mal, I know, but in the interst of helping

I think flavoured lube and things like that taste much worse than a bit of bodily fluids, but whatever...

at spunk being sterile, I don't care if it is, I wouldn't wash my hands in it!

[sungirltan]

af - well i thought i had this time.... - (looks worried)

[hobbgoblin]

AF i won't tell u what we do with creme eggs...

[EssenceOfJack]

hobb, I mean I lvoe DH, but I don't share my creme eggs with anyone for any reason.

[mamasunshine]

I could have written this post! I have the same problem, the thought of bodily fluids make me gag, I also hate having it on my body...hate touching it and have to wash my hands ASAP after sex. I never used to have a problem. However I also have a 7month old and 22month old, so maybe the lack of sleep, bf, constant nappies/sick etc is part to blame??? I hope so

[AnyFucker]

lol @ sungirltan...just teasin' ya

hobb, ffs, I don't wanna know, but I bet they get quite "melty"

[AnyFucker]

kerry...lol @ "gloss"

you don't polish ya bedposts with it, do you ?

[Malificence]

I seem to give the best head when I'm having some "attention" of my own, not 69-esque, that's too nice to be able to concentrate on anything but being played with definitely makes me more enthusiastic.

[cheerfulvicky]

Another one coming out of the closet, err so to speak.

I have a healthy appreciation for sex, but not for semen. If I'm going to come into contact with it, I get nervous. I'm sure this is something that could be partly gotten over, with time. But I think also part of it is just me being me. I do have venus in virgo = bit fastidious

I'm wondering if it depends on the partner to some extent? How comfortable you feel with them, how clean they are down there, their diet, and their attitude to oral? No women should ever feel obliged to give it, or nagged and chided over the issue. An atmosphere of gentle openness and safety is the best start to becoming a bit more daring when it comes to bodily fluids.

[BitOfFun]

Have you tried CBT? They would recommend either gradual desensitisation, or it could be uick and effective to try "flooding therapy", where you sit in a bath of semen.

It may take DP a while to produce that hygienically though, so perhaps let him draft in some friends, or just go for some warm wallpaper paste?