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Original poster

Swinging neighbours

77 replies

Sheet · 30/12/2009 22:15

We joined our local swinging community just recently. We feel committed enough to have planted Pampas Grass in the front garden as a marker.

We are new to the local swingers community and were getting to know some close neighbours really well. Last night the woman of the couple did golden showers all over my husband in front of some other neighbours. He got his coat. And I followed him a couple of hours later.

This wasn't what we signed up for and I feel she's taking the piss. What do you think we should do? How should we handle this situation? Our children go to the same primary school.

OP posts:
Original poster
Sheet · 31/12/2009 00:11

VicarIna. I'm sorry to hear that. Is he a Baritone now?

OP posts:
CantucciniVS · 31/12/2009 00:15

Message withdrawn

VicarInaTinselTuTu · 31/12/2009 00:24

only the front one fell off....cant say i noticed any discernible difference.

CantucciniVS · 31/12/2009 00:28

Message withdrawn

HopingForASunnyDay · 31/12/2009 00:44

Strictly speaking, it was your DH who 'took' the piss...well him and possibly also the front room carpet (depending on her aim, of course)

Anniegetyourgun · 31/12/2009 11:10

See that's what happens when you plant bloody pampas grass in a suburb, instead of a nice bit o' privet like decent folks.

#huffs#

scrimble · 31/12/2009 11:14

Is it really true about the pampas grass in the front garden?

My parents have a pampas grass in their front garden, though they didn't actually plant it there.

ItsGraceAgain · 31/12/2009 11:26

Scrimble, have you noticed any funny-smelling damp patches on your parents' living room carpet?

SimpleAsABC · 31/12/2009 12:16

Or ceiling?!

BigBadMummy · 31/12/2009 14:01

You have all just made me piss myself laughing.

Hysterical.

bruceb · 31/12/2009 14:22

(without a witness/recipient, I should add).

aka BBM's other half.

MABS · 31/12/2009 14:28

very very funny girls,love it

shockers · 31/12/2009 14:38

My briefs are very wide but I'm not on the neighbourhood watch committee... should I join.
Where can pampas grass be purchased from? It would look just the job on the front lawn of our bungalow.

bruceb · 31/12/2009 14:45

Any good garden centre should sell it.

Or you could go round your neighbourhood and find someone with a nice bush and ask for a cunting.

bruceb · 31/12/2009 14:45

cunting cutting.

Obviously

BelleDameSansMerci · 31/12/2009 14:51

Does April need some help with her plumbing?

pinksmarties · 31/12/2009 20:16

Oh my god, i haven't laughed so much in ages.

Thanks to you all for cheering me up. I only joined last night cos ive been dumped after 27 years and this has made my day.

funny women are what keep the world turning.xxx

Pantofino · 31/12/2009 20:24

I'm intrigued by the Ikea comments! Dh was saying the other day about popping round to look at the Cnut range of bedroom stuff, and told me that they do 3 sizes of meatballs with 2 different sauces. I thought he was suggesting shopping and lunch, but I wonder now.....

CantucciniVS · 31/12/2009 20:57

Message withdrawn

CantucciniVS · 31/12/2009 20:58

Message withdrawn

Pantofino · 31/12/2009 21:18

I don't know about the pampas grass, but he recently bought one ofthese for the front garden. He said it was religious iconography.

shockers · 31/12/2009 21:59

What church?? I've been thinking of changing... our vicar is a little dull.

VicarInaTinselTuTu · 31/12/2009 23:32

not me then...i wear tutus. made of tinsel.

CantucciniVS · 31/12/2009 23:37

Message withdrawn

bruceb · 01/01/2010 13:05

An old friend of mine reckoned the vicar was the prime mover in the wife-swapping circle.....but then what do you expect in leafy Surrey?

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