Oh crap. MIL gave me a very expensive dress, I gave it to charity shop, she wants it back......

[DrNortherner]

She put on weight and it no lobger fitted her. Was a very expensive long burgundy evening frock with bolero jacket. She said it was too expensive to give away, but she wanted me to have use of it.

It was too old fashioned for me, and she often dumps her cleared out stuff to me.

Anyway, she is off on a cruise next month, has lost weight and now thinks she'll fit into it. I did not have the heart to say I donated it to a charity shop.

She's coming round on WEdnesday to collect it.

Should I tel the truth, or say I can't find it, or I lent it to someone else.....?

HELP me.

What about saying you took it to a shop that sells "nearly new" clothes as it didn't suit you and you thought it a shame to waste it as it was "such a beautiful dress!" and FAR too good to give to charity AND you really didn't realise she would want it back or you'd NEVER have sold it etc. You could offer to give her the money you "made" on the sale of the dress! I don't like lies but sometimes it is the only way - and I think this is one of those cases. Good luck!

most of these won't work as you'd have said when she first mentioned it.

BID, BID, BID!

Moths are your only hope.

Ring her this evening. Say you have some bad news. You got the bag with the dress in it out of the wardrobe to air it. It was then you noticed moths had attacked the back of the dress and it is completely ruined.

You are now so worried about all of your cashmere/woollens (delete as appropriate) that you have bagged up the dress and thrown it out and you're now frantically checking all your and DH's sweaters before bagging them up and putting them in the freezer and first thing tomorrow you're off to buy some cedar moth repellents.

By this point she should be eating out of the palm of your hand and you go in for the kill. "MIL, I suggest you check your wardrobe too as I would hate for it to happen to you too".

This plan should work because (as anyone who has had moths will tell you) once you find an infestation you have to chuck the damaged items away as far and soon as humanly possible. They are a bugger to get rid of so noone in their right mind would open a bag to get a look at the damage. There is no way you would have known this earlier when she called. You can make it seem even more realistic by putting a couple of jumpers (in bags, this is v important) in the freezer.

NB, this evil plan should not be used for dresses made of synthetic fibres

No one has mentioned a mouse yet. Perhaps one had made a nest in your cupboard and nibbled it to shreds. And you know how mice pee on everything so you heartbrokenly had to burn it. Weep if necessary because you loved that dress.....

You can have a black and gold velvet and taffeta dress that someone gave me if you want to offer her something equally bad as a consolation.

It might be worth checking with the charity shop in case they held it back for some sort of Christmas display. Or someone from the shop may have taken a fancy to it and might be bribed into giving it back.

You are devestated, you loved that dress. You wore it at every opportunity and one evening a waiter spilt [x] on it. You took it to the dry cleaners, who ruined it, so you buried it

buried it

LOL

She will want it dug up, I bet you

Is this the dress? Is that also your MIL?

I have moths too - also curly bears or whatever the feck the pupae of moths are called. However the worst one this year has to be the wasps nest which was discovered up the skirt of a ballgown in my 'posh' (very rarely opened) wardrobe.

So yes I'd be going with insect damage. If you have a cat say the cat bought an animal in and left it in the wardrobe to moulder and the dress got maggots on it. She'll wander away shuddering and won't ask any more. Incidentally this can happen, I once found a wild rabbit in my knicker drawer (no pun intended)

LOL
hye norhtener
your SISTER in law will have a field day

oh that's right, she's a real cow, isn't she? Can you blame it on her somehow? Kill two birds etc

If you've already agreed that she can come over on Wednesday, then I think you're going to have to go with the "I can't find it" excuse. I think I would say that I lent it to a friend and was sure that she'd returned it.. but maybe she hasn't. Then try to get in touch with said friend, but to no avail. When eventually (after the cruise) you do get in touch with your friend, you can be very cross because your friend gave it away to a charity shop, thinking it had been given to her (not lent). That way, if MIL has seen it in a charity shop, it will all tie in nicely.

Wish I wasn't such a good liar

WMMC where do you live?

yes oyu lent it to her and she was drunk and cant remember

we are idtentifying you a lot N
hope sil doesnt read this

WMMC you need to get on top of those. If you find one, squash it with something pointy. If you see a moth, kill it straight away.

Spray under furniture where you have wool carpets and in the wardrobe.

We moved here and half the carpet was eaten away, so ripped it up, hoovered floorboards, sprayed, went round at night killing moths that settled on the ceiling for a few months. Have not seen one flying for ages now.
You can get rid, it just takes careful searching and keeping on disturbing places they might hide - look under individual drawers, especially plywood ones, they like the dust.

what if one of MILs friends has bought it from the charity shop

and they are onto you

Is there a risk of that - sil?

Justanothermanicmummy - if you check out my profile my house is on there - we have a variety of wildlife - less now the cat is dead and not dragging them in every day. But in Oxfordshire.

Tell her you gave it away to a charity fashion auction to raise money for (insert name of charity that she likes here) and that it made £50 for xxxx. Say it was the only thing you had that was worth anything and you thought it was a really good cause, given that you probably wouldn't have had occasion to wear it yourself seemed like a waste to have it hanging in the wardrobe forever unused.

btw had bad moth problem at old house - my mistake was ignoring them for a while, till they got bad. You need to be proactive.

Funnily enough they preferred the only room with no carpet - it had laminate floor, which creates masses of dust, they really liked that.

you tried it on and burst the seams, it was that tight

you took it to a dressmaker to get it repairedand she told you there wasn't enough leeway in the seams to alter it to fit you.

WMMC I had a look. I am so very . It's gorgeous! I live in a shoe box and the only wildlife is the moths

I think my plan is best

Yes indeed, I've been here four years, we've had: rats, mice, beetles, ants, wasps, bees, bats, woodlice, woodworms, silverfish, voles, frogs, newts, ravens, jackdaws, wood pigeons and finally, rabbits to deal with.

We are thinking of asking Rentokil if they'd like to use our house for training purposes