Worried about DH

[Washersaurus]

He is so scary sometimes...

DS2 has D&V again,so DH just went off on one stomping about, moaning how he is always ill - when I told him we just had to deal with it as no use complaining, he started punching himself in the head whilst he was holding DS2

He says he doesnt want to speak to me and that it is all me and that 'he knows what my game is'(he always says this)

tis weird and i'm not sure what to do

sorry about typos have sick baby on lap

i'd be worried

has he always been like this?
It does not sound ok at all

for you.
CAT me if you like.

do you think he's depressed?

agree blinks.. Washersaurus, you and kids fine though?

are either of you getting any sleep?

oh washersaurus,
what can i do to help?

do you have msn?

I'd get him to see someone professional asap.
This isn't normal and he is quite probably ill.
Are you and the children safe?

DS2 asleep on my lap here on sofa and DS1 in bed

DH has gone to bed

Do you feel safe>?

He goes through stages like this where he hates me and threatens to kill himself or leave.

I asked him to see the doc about his temper - apparently the doctor told him he needed a divorce, not counselling.

Most of the time he is fine though

NHS Direct/24 (depending on whether you're in Scotland or England) have specialist advisors who deal with mental health.

you can remain anonymous and you can call for advise and/or he can too.

they can point you in the right direction.

0845 46 47 - nhs direct

08454 24 24 24 - nhs 24

A divorce?
Even if he did need a divorce punching himself in the head is not normal, no matter how you look at it.
How long has he been like this?

I don't worry for my safety, but I do worry that he doesn't seem to care about scaring the children at all when he gets like this

you need to speak to his doctor, and probably some close family so you're not alone in this.

It seems to have happened gradually IYSWIM

He has always had a bad temper when cross, but these days he goes from 0-threatened suicide in about 10 minutes

Hmm, I can understand that, it can be quite scary for a child.

My step-father was bipolar (they called it manic depressive then though)
He would get quite odd moments where he was sure my mother and I were plotting things behind his back, I don't know if it started like this but what you're saying about him 'knowing what your game is' sounds very similar to what my mother said he was like at the beginning.
She found it really hard to get him to get help and even after he was diagnosed he wouldn't take his tablets sometimes.
I think you really need to call someone in the mh profession, I don't want to scare you but my stepfather got worse and worse, going to train bridges to throw himself off and being violent towards me.
If he is ill you need to try and get him help, for his, yours and the DCs sakes.

Sometimes I wonder if it really might be me..I mean, I do know which buttons to press to get a reaction...?

It's not you.
No-one punches themselves in the head unless they are ill or trying to get a reaction themselves.

it's not you washersaurus, he sounds very ill.

He won't talk to me at all though, and I don't think his family would take me seriously - grumpiness runs in their family
from what I can tell.

Have I done this to him? He has had to deal with so much financial stress and DS2 never sleeps and is always ill..

please call nhs direct/24.

i work there and they can really help

I can't call whilst he is upstairs - he probably isn't asleep

He has been all weird about going to bed the last couple of nights; refusing to sleep until I went up too

Sorry am chatting my mum on msn (about something totally different)

I just thought DH was being a bit controlling about the bed thing. He got really cross last night because I said I was going up with him at 10pm and then spent 30mins tidying the kitchen. You would have thought it was the middle of the night the way he was going on at me.

can you talk to your mum?
does she live nearby?