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Original poster

match.com...... would you sleep with someone on a first date?

43 replies

jvs · 05/09/2008 19:13

Met someone I had been chatting to for sometime through internet dating site last night..... I did not but could have easily ended up in bed! I really was very tempted (he seemed lovely!) would that have made me a bit of a tart? Have not been on a date for years and it might (possibly) have been something I could have done as a 20 year old (I never did that said) but would not have expected it of myself at age 37!!!!

OP posts:
OneBoyOneGirl · 05/09/2008 19:15

Not now im older and wiser, although I did once

BBBee · 05/09/2008 19:18

maybe it is not like a first daye if you have been talking online etc because you know each other so wekll already.

or maybe i have a slutty justification streak!

feedmenow · 05/09/2008 19:18

If you want to then you should go for it!! Who's to say what is or isn't tarty? So long as you're careful then no harm done....

arewenearlythereyet · 05/09/2008 19:21

oh God help me am off for a first date with someone have 'met' on net, am so out of practice was looking for the bar tonight for some virtual dutch courage but have forgotten how to start a thread so am hi-jacking this one. for the record its probably best not to shag them on the first date I think, gives you and them something to look forward too!

arewenearlythereyet · 05/09/2008 19:22

ps not because it would make you a tart at all, you are a grown woman with a mind of your own

Original poster
jvs · 05/09/2008 19:22

Was very... very tempted!

OP posts:
Desiderata · 05/09/2008 19:23

I've always slept with men on a first date. I don't want to waste my time on a small schlonger.

Original poster
jvs · 05/09/2008 19:25

arewenearlythereyet..... hope your date goes as well as mine!!!! Where are you going?
So I guess it is ok to jump into bed on a 2nd date then??? Good am so out of practice!!!

OP posts:
beansmum · 05/09/2008 19:27

I would/have on a first date, if I a) didn't really want to see them again but thought they were attractive and fancied a shag or b) liked them a LOT and didn't want to waste time. I am a bit of a tart though, or was pre ds.

Original poster
jvs · 05/09/2008 19:31

....do you think these days men think any less of yo these days if you do jump straight into bed?
Beansmum/desiderata.... am beginning to think I am a bit of a prude!

OP posts:
TracksuitLover · 05/09/2008 19:35

I don't think it is wrong or slutty to sleep with him on the first date but I think waiting a bit means that you will be more reassured that he doesn't want you ONLY for sex but enjoys seeing you for YOU and who you are as well. I've always slept with men immediately and wish I hadn't. I wish I had made them 'earn' it a bit by taking more time to be nice to me and show interest in me and respect first.

Chequers · 05/09/2008 19:37

Personally I wouldn't but don't think it's a bad thing.

My mate met a guy on match.com - he went home with her that day and never left, they've been married 3 years now with a dc on the way

Original poster
jvs · 05/09/2008 19:38

Blimey Chequers.... maybe I should have slept with him after all!

OP posts:
beansmum · 05/09/2008 19:40

if a guy is going to think less of you for sleeping with him on a first date (it takes two surely?) he is a bit of a twat anyway. imo.

muggglewump · 05/09/2008 19:43

I would if I wanted to.
I wouldn't not sleep with someone just to make a point that I am a "nice girl" or some such shit, mainly because I'm not and I don't judge decency on when someone has sex.
If we both wanted to have sex I see no reason not to. If he didn't want anything to do with me after, it would show me we had different attitudes to sex, plus he was a total twat anyway.

citylover · 05/09/2008 19:44

I think it would depend on the guy really. One I spoke/texted etc from online I think I would have had we met - he has gone cold though - no idea why! He is very very fanciable and I am really attracted to him.

Another that I hope to meet next weekend would not, and wouldn't be able to as will have to get back for babysitter, there has been no suggestive talk at all between us.

That doesn't really help does it. But as someone who doesn't like rules would just go with the flow and my instincts in any given situation.

arewenearlythereyet · 05/09/2008 19:46

JVS date 2 def! just going to the pub for a drink. have also 'done it' on first date and wished I hadn;t so guess that may colour my view a little, but certainly would again i'm sure...

cafebistro · 05/09/2008 19:53

Have 'done it' on a first date and also purposely waited a few dates and in both instances the 'relationships' have turned out to be crap.
Two of my longest relationships ( excepting the one im in now!) started off as one nighters. i think if your into someone go for it!

Original poster
jvs · 05/09/2008 19:57

ooohhh better dig out the bikini wax then!!!

OP posts:
arewenearlythereyet · 05/09/2008 20:16

no purposly have not, so I can't!(wink)

Hobnobfanatic · 05/09/2008 20:29

I think waiting - even if you are both gagging for it - is kinda more exciting. Though traditionally, I've generally shagged on the third date with all my long-term lovers; the current one (through Match), I waited until date 5 (I'm positively frigid now I'm in my late 30s!).

But if you both want to, why the hell not? If you've been chatting online, you must know each other pretty well - just trust your instincyt.

When is date 2? Wear your best undies!

Lizzylou · 05/09/2008 20:39

I did with DH, 12 years ago, we have been married for 6yrs next month. I was only 23 at the time.

I think that you should go with the flow if you want to, depends what you want from the relationship. Maybe not advisable if you know you will get upset if they don't call again (happened a few times to me as a student )

LolaTheShowgirl · 05/09/2008 20:54

you old schlappers! get in there

NotDoingTheHousework · 05/09/2008 20:57

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NotDoingTheHousework · 05/09/2008 20:58

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