Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So would you take revenge on the other woman if your DP/DH cheated on you?

85 replies

LynetteScavo · 23/08/2008 21:42

Tin of paint over her car?

Informing of her benifit fraud?

How far would you go?

OP posts:
NotDoingTheHousework · 23/08/2008 21:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 23/08/2008 21:44

I would take revenge on him.

In court.

Big style.

Her? She's a loser if she goes out with a married chap and she'll get what she has coming sooner or later.

ranting · 23/08/2008 21:44

I'm not sure but if he was the physically nearest he might feel the full force of my wrath first.

MrsSnorty · 23/08/2008 21:44

I would feel like it but probably wouldn't do it. (Revenge being a dish best served cold and all that). Think the DP/DH would be more deserving of an act of fury unless other woman was a friend/someone you trusted.

SquiffyHock · 23/08/2008 21:45

Not unless she was my best friend and I felt like she had cheated on me too. If she's a stranger then I'm afraid all my venom would be directed at him.

Hope you're okay.

bythepowerofgreyskull · 23/08/2008 21:45

probably not, I am more of a curl up in a tight ball and hide from the world kind of person

I envy the passion of people who do things like this though

hockeypuck · 23/08/2008 21:45

I'd probably get revenge on both of them. DH by doing the same back to him and Other woman in some other way (nothing criminal though - too much hassle) you can get arrested for criminal damage for paint over car. But I reckon giving her name and number to all the double glazing comapanies in the area, signing her up to anything you get money for by referring someone (Next, Boden etc)

Petty I know, it's obvious it wouldn't make you feel better but you feel like you have to do something!

Shitehawk · 23/08/2008 21:47

No. The kind of stupid bint who goes out with a married man would not be worth me expending my energy on.

I would want to take revenge on him big time though. He is the one with the wedding ring, he is the one in the relationship - he choses to stick it somewhere it shouldn't go, he pays the price.

LynetteScavo · 23/08/2008 21:49

Oh I'm OK!

DH to tired to cheat on me LOL. One of my best friends has just been cheated on, but is rising above revenge. It just got me thinking, as I think I would make the other womans life hell.

OP posts:
KerryMum · 23/08/2008 21:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

beansmum · 23/08/2008 21:50

I punished the last guy who cheated on me by insisting that he took me out for drinks with the other woman, so I could meet her and not have to bump into her accidentally somewhere, Edinburgh isn't that big. He was soooooo scared all evening, I had an ok time actually. I wouldn't take revenge on the woman though.

LynetteScavo · 23/08/2008 21:50

too tired. (like me)

OP posts:
Kally · 23/08/2008 21:53

I beat the crap out of my x when I found out. He was laying there asleep after I'd been sitting in my car heartbroken and crying so the kids wouldn't see me so distraught. I came indoors when the lites went out knowing the kids would be asleep and so able to tackle the situation calmly. But he was asleep!!!! Snoring his head off in the land of bliss!!! Boy did he eat a knuckle sandwich whilst he slept. The thing is you don't realise how hard it is to hit someone who is totally oblivious, deep in sleep and unaware. I stood there for a good few minutes before I actually did it.
He woke up absolutely stunned, as to which I brought him down with another one. Thats what you call release. But I have never ever done anything as aggressive as that since and looking back I don't know how I did it as I am a quiet calm person usually. (Well he did hit below the belt morally)...

whatdayisit · 23/08/2008 21:59

I don't get this revenge on the other woman thing. Its was him who cheated.

But I would be very tempted to inform, if she was a benefit cheat.

expatinscotland · 23/08/2008 22:03

I have no problem grassing benefits cheats, though.

They make people who claim legitimately look bad and that pisses me off.

NotDoingTheHousework · 23/08/2008 22:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

ElfOnTheTopShelf · 23/08/2008 22:04

I dont think you gain anything from revenge. Yes, some small satisfaction but I guess it doesn't last long.

Getting on with your life and showing you have moved on is always a big kick for ex partners ime - my ex cheated on me, messed me around, but despised it when I got myself a new man (now my DH) and would come into pubs when we were there to stare at us.

I guess that dropping the new womans number in the phone boxes under "personal services" wouldn't stay on your mind too long though...

troubledfriend · 23/08/2008 22:46

No. She was not the one who promised to be faithful to me.

Just like I would not think it ok for her husband to come round and beat up my husband.

VERY low class Neddy behaviour imo

Nor would I seek revenge on my husband. An explanation, yes.

umberella · 23/08/2008 22:49

No - not because I didn't want her to suffer, but because what goes around generally comes around imo.

Plus, you shouldn't let yourself get too bitter about stuff.

Tiramissu · 23/08/2008 22:58

As others have say HE is the one who cheated.
As for her no i wouldn't bother. Simply because she will get her revenge later anyway.

'Once a cheater, always a cheater', she ll do it to her too. And you will watch them arguing and splitting up and you ll have a good laugh

Tiramissu · 23/08/2008 23:04

obviously i meant 'he ll do it to her too

QueenyEisGotTheBall · 23/08/2008 23:12

i wouldnt do anything to the other woman unless she was someone i knew or was related to. i would consider the benefit cheating thing though
i would however exact some embarrassing and possibly painful revenge on my DH if he ever dared to stray. i would expect nothing less if it were me straying and my DH wanted revenge
and also i would add a nice big fat divorce to the revenge list as cheating is a deal breaker in my book regardless of the specifics of the relationship (how long you have been together, how well you usually feel your marriage/relationship is going) although i suppose i would have to find myself in that situation to actually know what i would do with DH (this is what i did with the other relationships in which i was cheated on)
xx ei xx

ginnny · 24/08/2008 00:43

Five years ago my ex left me for another woman. I didn't do or say anything to her, just walked away and left them to it. Now he's doing the dirty on her and confiding in me about it.
I'm enjoying my revenge now - thinking that now the boot is on the other foot and she is now feeling what she put me through.
And most importantly, I still have my dignity intact. whereas she turned out to be a complete nutter.

electra · 24/08/2008 00:44

Absolutely not - I would see it as his fault, not hers actually.

AnnVan · 24/08/2008 01:02

I don't think I'd want revenge on her. However, having said that I know someone who went after a married man, got him, was having it off with him in his marital home behind his wife's back and eventually got him to leave the wife. She sometimes refers to his wife, and always with a little smirk, as if she thinks what she did is awfully clever. I think it's despicable and wander how long it will be before he cheats on her. Some of her relatives say that he's flirted with other women right in front of them!

Swipe left for the next trending thread