Why would a grown woman do this?

[RooBee17]

I have been attending a local slimming group for almost 2 years now. On the same day i started another new member joined and we became good friends. We socialisd outside of group and took our kids out for days out.
7 months after starting slimming I gained a little confidence in myself and started dating a man I am still with now.
My friend met him once and she seemed really happy for me.
In the past few months my friend gave up slimming so doesn't go anymore so I go it alone.
Recently my boyfriend attended a group with me on his day off work. I have made good friends there and I talk about slimming a lot so he came to check it out.
I returned the following week on my own and the ladies were shocked.
"Your boyfriend isn't what we expected "
I found out from them that on a week I wasn't present my friend showed them a pic of my boyfriend. Except it wasn't him.
It seems she had googled someone with extreme facial tattoos and piercings and claimed it was him!
I messaged her when I got home. It wasn't confrontational. I just said the ladies were a bit surprised when my boyfriend showed up as he wasn't anything like they had been shown and I then mentioned the photo she had showed them.
I don't know what I expected her to say but she just played dumb and said she had no idea what I was talking about.
I can't work it out, but I am done with this friendship now. I really can't be bothered with such childish behaviour.
Just had to get this off my chest!

This is relationships, not AIBU. Some of the aggression on here is nuts. This is why I stopped starting threads on Mumsnet.

I'm glad that I'm not the only one who finds that strange.

Showing a pic of someone elses boyfriend is bizarre behaviour whether it was him or not! I cant imagine how that would even come up. Weird friend you are best off keeping away from her.

I’m wondering if those who are commenting about it strange your bf coming in has actually attended SW themselves . I used to go for years and it happened now and again that a partner would pop in, quite normal . I’ve now lost all my weight on Mounjaro so no need for SW , but no not unusual at all if u ask me

Is it hell. Its for anyone. Its not aerobics, you don't prance about in lycra. Its a slimming club. Why do you think its for women? How the hell would a man seeing what its all about be insensitive?? Do you not remember the slimming club from Little Britain? "Dust!" Definitely mixed. I know its not a documentary but if even that sexist crap had men at slimming I think we can cope in 2026.

Haha I really am grasping at straws!

Hi op, based on your op & subsequent responses I believe your former friend is jealous, bitter & mean spirited. Life is hard enough, no one needs a friend who behaves as you describe. I’ve never understood why people do things like this but life is full of unpleasant people who cannot stand seeing others happy. Keep doing what makes you happy op ❤️

People do really weird shit I’ve realised by being on this forum.

bringing your boyfriend to slimming group, what to show him off as you’ve got one or as he’s controlling. It’s such an odd thing to do, then she’s showing pics of some random bloke,

why on earth is she showing people pics of your boyfriend, why do others want to see what he looks like. How’s it such a big deal you’ve got a boyfriend,

It's pretty inappropriate tbh - people are quite vulnerable at support groups and bringing someone along as a +1 / tourist will make some people (who are paying to be there) uncomfortable.

It is not allowed in most groups like that to bring in someone else due to gdpr.

Just don't take the bait OP. You've explained enough.

He sat there whilst attendees had their weigh ins?

She obviously jealous , and fed up with her own life i knew someone like this.
You don't need this kind of person in your life they're toxic.

Men do go to slimming clubs you know.

Indeed
As a guest? Not so much

Was that the only weird thing she did or do you look back now and see the clues?
Don’t get me wrong, that was more than enough weird to block and ignore 😂.
Thanks for sharing, I love randomness in life! Well done sticking with your slimming.

Yeah, there are a few issues with the info provided.

There has been an influx of 'new boyfriend' threads recently where the single friend is clearly jealous. Im not sure what is in the air these days.

I've had "friends" like this - in primary school! I've literally not seen (been the victim of) this behaviour since I was 8 or 9! She reminds me of those girls who used to make fun of your voice, or do impressions of how you walked, etc. It was like your own friend hated you. I guess girls like that grow up to be like this woman.

There is no accounting for why she chose a picture of a random unconventional looking guy, and tried to pass it off as your boyfriend, knowing it would spark controversy. She's mentally unwell. You can't spend any more time wondering why she's done it. Just know that this sort of thing does happen a lot to other women. I still see it now, but it hasn't happened to me personally since school, as I say.

She's absolutely desperate for attention, and unfortunately she's made you her target.

My goodness. Get a life.

Could the group have mixed up two stories? Maybe she mentioned meeting your boyfriend, and the photo was about something else entirely but they conflated the two? I tend to think things are more likely the product of miscommunication than deliberate lying. Especially if you are a close group who might show each other photos of your lives, so it could be likely they would see a real photo of him at some stage so why would she put herself in that position?

She probably slags you off to the other’s in the group because she’s envious of you, and probably wasn’t anticipating that you’d bring your boyfriend to slimming group. Just having laugh at your expense, really.

She’s a horrible person, but I guess that says a lot about how unusual it is for people’s partner’s to tag along if she thought she could get away with it without them ever finding out he looked nothing like that.

Hypocritical.

yes! even if it was him, that can only be because they're gossiping. I thought as a pp said at first - she showed a fake photo because they were being nosy asking questions if they knew she met him only, why deny it?

Why?! Slimming groups are open to men and women, so being a man isn’t a problem. They’re also open to people who aren’t overweight and are just maintaining a healthy weight, so not being fat isn’t a problem either.

It’s Slimming World, not an AA meeting.