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Original poster

man with kids vs without

79 replies

GoldenDeliciouss · 27/10/2026 15:40

this is aimed at mums rather than those without kids so if you are a single mum do you prefer to date a man with kids or without? i also thought id prefer someone without but as ive got older and definitely dont want anymore im now thinking men with kids would be a better option as long as they are same age as mine or older (definitely wouldnt consider someone with young children) so single mums whats your preference when dating?

OP posts:
FunPartyIdeas · 29/10/2026 17:48

Buscake · 29/10/2026 14:14

there seem to be plenty of men who don’t have kids, or who don’t want kids from what I can see. I’m 41 and currently chatting with a guy the same age as me who has no children and doesn’t want them. We’ve been on a date and it went really well: his life is busy, my life is busy, and we’re both really happy to go at a nice slow pace and I’m enjoying getting to know him. I feel really validated that I can put what I want first, rather than conforming to what I think a man would want from me.

I’ve done so much therapy and so much work on myself, the bar is really high and I’m not lowering it for anybody. If they don’t meet it, I just won’t pursue it. So on that basis, I just don’t match with men with kids 🤷 there was one guy I was speaking to who turned out to be a dad, but hadn’t put that in his bio: it just didn’t go anywhere because I knew it wasn’t what I wanted.

so this works for me right now, but if you’re looking for a more traditional partnership then be upfront with them that that is what you’re looking for. How are you finding dating OP? Are you on apps, etc?

Fair play to you!
Do you have kids of your own?
I had two (50/50 shared care) when I met my now husband. He was 41 and didn't have any of his own.

Buscake · 29/10/2026 20:49

@FunPartyIdeasyes I have 3 secondary age kids and I’m solo parent - their dad is prohibited from any form of contact.

shuffleofftobuffalo · 29/10/2026 22:54

Without. I don’t want to parent someone else’s kids, especially if they are younger (mine is mid teens now). I also don’t expect or want a man to step into “stepdad” role and parent mine.

I do find (from experience) that many men who have kids and are dating assume a woman will take on all the childcare. No thanks.

Original poster
GoldenDeliciouss · 30/10/2026 01:39

thanks for all your thoughts, still swaying more towards men with kids (older kids.) haven’t started dating yet just planning on getting back out there now so was thinking ahead 😂

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