man with kids vs without

[GoldenDeliciouss]

this is aimed at mums rather than those without kids so if you are a single mum do you prefer to date a man with kids or without? i also thought id prefer someone without but as ive got older and definitely dont want anymore im now thinking men with kids would be a better option as long as they are same age as mine or older (definitely wouldnt consider someone with young children) so single mums whats your preference when dating?

I’m not single, but if I ever was to be, I don’t think I’d be interested in a man without children, because (a) if he was my age and wanted children, but never had a serious enough relationship where it was an option, I wouldn’t be interested. I’d assume there was something wrong with him.

(b) if he never wanted children, I don’t think we’d have enough in common to forge a successful long term relationship. The only men I know my age who have chosen not to settle down and have a family are out partying every weekend, dabbling in drugs, just generally living a lifestyle that wouldn’t be compatible with mine.

When I started dating again post separation, I didn’t have any fixed ideas about dating men with vs without children. Could see there would be pros and cons to both tbh. Then was surprised by just how many childless men there were on the apps. I only went on dates with 3 in the end, all childless as it happens, and am now in a loving relationship with a childless man. I have children (some primary aged and some adult age) and it works perfectly fine for me tbh. It’s made things less complicated because there is only 1 set of childcare responsibilities to work around. I don’t have to worry about “blending” anything. My ex has also moved on with someone who has no children of her own so no blending there either

Just because a man had made it to his 40’s or 50’s without children of his own isn’t necessarily a red flag. And doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t like kids.

Man without kids every time. I do not want a blended family.

I’m a lone mum. Depends really why the man with kids was single…. Mostly it’s because they were shit dads to their own kids?. They aren’t the kind of people I’d want around my own. Childless men come with their own issues of course not least the question why they dont have children - is it because no woman looked at them and thought they were good enough to be the father of their children? Are they selfish? Peter Pan syndrome - didn’t want to grow up and then got their late 40s and early 50s and missed the child boat. Both types come with red flags.
if there was a 3rd category of a widower with children I’d prefer that very small pool personally

most childless men will want kids? do
you want more?

No!

I have no interest in becoming a step mother figure.

When I was on the date sites (happily single and over the want for a relationship now) I avoided men without kids as I just found them selfish with no real idea of the realities of parenthood. However, after a while I also avoided men with really young kids, especially daughters, as I found them obsessive. However, that said, they’re not all the same so had I got chatting to someone I seemed to connect with, the kid situation wasn’t really an issue as really you need to judge them at face value.

The men I date tend to have kids but older kids, I’m late 40s and no way would I date someone with younger kids.

If I were to date again I’d be happy to date a man with older children, or no children. But not young kids.

I think it's all well and good to think you never date someone's with/without kids, or kids above a particular age but it can all go out the window very quickly if you meet sometime who truly knocks your socks off ...

This is where you have to think with your head, not your heart!

Another man’s children hold no interest to me. I wouldn’t date anyone that has kids.

This is where you have to think with your head, not your heart!

Which is all well and good til you meet someone your heart can't love without 😂

I’m not ruled by my heart, so I’ll be okay!

I think it depends on the individuals life story. I’d sway more towards with kids but if there was an explanation like they’d been with someone who didn’t want or couldnt have kids and now felt like they’d missed the boat then that could be the ideal. In my experience having DC doesn’t necessarily predict kindness, unselfishness or understanding unfortunately.

Without. Definitely.

Always without. I say that a SM.

not for me, cant be dealing with young kids so wouldn't get past the talking stage

wouldnt be a step mum if they are older kids my kids are teens certainly not looking for a step dad

My daughter is about to go off to uni.
A man with no kids - maybe.
A man with young kids - absolutely not!
A man with older / adult children living at home - LAT relationship at most.

I’m a woman without children and have recently realised that I will never again be someone’s number one - unless, perhaps, I date someone without children. If they do have kids, I’ll always - quite rightly - be secondary to their kids. I think that might be quite hard long term.

yeah thats totally different which is why this is aimed at single parents as we already have kids 🤣 so they are our priority

It depends on age, your own and the kids. I'm 40 and most guys I've gone on dates with have been aged 38-45, all the ones without kids still wanted them, but were planning to have them "later".

So doesn't have kids and wants them - I've had my kids so this wouldnt work.

Never had kids and doesn't want them - why would he want to make a life with my kids, wouldn't work.

Has kids - only option.

Yes, I agree about the obsession with young girls. What’s that all about? They treat them like princesses but can't parent them, which is rather nauseating.