What does this mean? My boyfriend hasn't texted me for 5 days but still keeps liking my IG stories

[ThatCalicoCat]

I'm looking for outside opinions because I genuinely don't know how to interpret this.

I'm 24F and my boyfriend is 21M. We've been together since January and are long-distance. He hasn't sent me a single message in 5 days. During those 5 days, I've seen him online every day, actively joining Discord calls and gaming with his friends for hours.

What confuses me is that he's also still watching and liking my Instagram stories. So he's clearly seeing my activity and interacting with it, but he hasn't texted me at all.
We've already had conversations about me feeling lonely and wanting more communication. He knows this is an issue in our relationship.

I'm not trying to control his gaming or his friendships. I'm just struggling to understand what it means when someone has time to be online, talk to friends, and like your stories, but not send a simple "hey" to their girlfriend for 5 days.

Would you interpret this as needing space, emotional avoidance, losing interest, or something else?

Have you contacted him and he hasn’t replied?
Honestly it sounds like he’s really just not that into the relationship. If he was, he’d have been in contact.

Maybe this is how the younger generation communicate now!

Dump him you deserve better

Have you messaged him?

Lost interest. He is prioritising playing games with his friends over maintaining a relationship.

Long distance relationships only work if both parties are truly commited and put in a lot of work. Not just saying the right things and making the right noises.

Don't pay attention to what people say - pay attention to what they do! And he is showing you exactly where you are in his priorities.

Have you messaged him?

I’m the one who reach out to say hi every morning and he’ll just reply as good morningg or something like that and that’s it. If I’m not finding any topic to talk we barely talk at all cuz he always doing something (He always responds to my texts tho he’s not really initiates any conversation with me anymore)

How many times have you met in person?

If he wanted to speak to you he would. It's as simple as that. For whatever reason he isn't interested in talking to you, for nearly a week.

He sounds like a shit boyfriend. You can do better. Send him a message and tell him simply that it’s not working for you. Then find someone who can be bothered to offer you more than the bare minimum. His poor communication is bad enough, but no communication at all is just lazy and shows you where you are in his priorities. Have you dated much before him? What are your experiences and expectations of a relationship? Your boyfriend should make you feel cared for and cherished not left wondering why he’s not contacting you. Raise the bar for your next boyfriend

Sounds like you are at different stages in life, and want different things - probably time to move on and find someone more aligned

I'd actively start dating other guys. This one is hopeless. He's only 21, try dating older guys, say 26-28.

We’ve met for 3 times and everything went extremely well back then. He’s coming to my country in the next 3 weeks but I’m not so sure anymore rather I should meet him or not

Zero effort is needed to watch and like IG stories, he's probably watched hundreds over the last five days and liked many of them. Texting requires more interest and motivation (though not much), and he obviously isn't interested in putting in even that little bit of effort. I'd say he's not particularly interested in you, sadly.

@ThatCalicoCat with respect you’ve met 3 times. He is an acquaintance not a boyfriend

Start channelling Miranda.

You've only been together for 5 months and he is showing you that you are not his priority.

Move on @ThatCalicoCat

eta; do not meet him in your country!

You've met him 3 times in 6 months. I can't imagine any 21 year old male saving himself sexually for that. Sorry, but I'd eat my hat if he wasn't seeing other women.

It sounds like he’s lazy and will passively drop a like on a story but can’t be bothered to have a proper conversation or quality communication with you.

He’s prioritising his friends etc over you.

What does long distance mean? Do you ever actually meet up? Wouldn’t be enough for me, even if he WAS calling or texting me a lot.

He has lost interest in you but is stringing you along for the opportunity of a trip to your country. I assume he will be staying with you and getting free accommodation and food. Even if he is going to stay in a hotel, you being available will be of benefit to him.

Cancel his holiday and tell him you won’t be staying in contact with him. Then do more with people who live near you to be in a position to meet a decent man who will treat you well

Why on earth are you interested in this loser, OP? You deserve so much better. Just block him. He's not interested, he's immature and he doesn't even live near you, thank god.

Not.

Is he even coming especially to see you? Or just happens to be over so you’ll meet up while he’s here?

Move on, this is going nowhere.

Can I ask whether you paid for his ticket - or for anything else in your relationship? Did he think he was going to stay with you?

End it.
He's not that bothered about you or he would make more of an effort.

You both live in different countries whats the point in all this drama.
Find someone in your own town.

You're not even in the same country, you've only met three times in five months, and he can't be arsed to text you. He's not really your boyfriend, is he?

OP, please just find a person who you can actually interact with face to face rather than someone who doesn't even live in the same country as you. I'm all for OLD but why make it so hard for yourself?

He just sounds like he can't be arsed which isn't surprising for a 21 year old.